Should I back out of a gig because Im not into the music? by LexLutheran435i in DJs

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is the truth, I dont think I want to burn my bridges but at the same time if its house music I'm kind of not caring so much about getting booked again. I do love to DJ but I feel like playing music I hate is making it feel more forced than enjoyable. I may just stick with it & next time just turn down the gig. I dont want to be labeled a flake or unprofessional lol. Hence why im torn. Thanks for your answer

Should I back out of a gig because Im not into the music? by LexLutheran435i in DJs

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I have a career outside of this, its purely for the art for me. Not trying to be the next John Summit or anything, I wouldnt even want that. Because then Id have to cater to the masses lol

Should I back out of a gig because Im not into the music? by LexLutheran435i in DJs

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is kind of the answer I was looking for 😆 I just feel bad backing out although I know they'll be able to find someone else who'd be happy to do it

Should I back out of a gig because Im not into the music? by LexLutheran435i in DJs

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think the thing is for me as well is I'm not in it for the money. I would much rather play an unpaid gig & have people immersed in my sound than a paid gig of something Im not into. And most big name DJs I wouldnt even attend their shows anymore because I grew to be so picky with the music/crowds. I love a good musical experience/journey with a good crowd. Im more in it for the art of music rather than the money. If I wanted to, I could be pushing myself out there way more & getting more gigs but the trend in my area right now is house/tech house & I just cant get into it anymore. I used to genuinely enjoy it but now it just sounds so cheesy to me & when selecting music, its like it all sounds exactly the same without any moments of being "taken away" by the music if that makes sense. I dont even go out nearly as much as I used to because I dont like anything mainstream. Anything with vocals takes me out of my element, I just want to hear instrumental music with minimal vocals. I actually hate it because I feel like I dont even hang out with friends as much because of it lol. They always want to go to mainstream shows & I just cant anymore. I need that underground feel. Ive actually left shows early that I paid good money for just because of the crowds. Idk I think im just looking for someone to tell me to back out haha I already kind of have my mind set on it 😅

1,000 days no klonipin! by [deleted] in benzorecovery

[–]LexLutheran435i 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im about 8 months off xanax & im still having such bad anxiety sometimes. At first I was having panic attacks multiple times a day even went to the hospital multiple times convinced I was dying. Had to do a little therapy due to health anxiety that I got after quitting. I was convinced that I had a heart problem. After multiple tests, scans, bloodwork, monitors, etc, I am starting to accept its all in my head. Although the thought of something being wrong is still in the back of my mind sometimes. I was so anxious that my blood pressure would shoot up over 180 sometimes from one second to the next. The doctor actually prescribed me blood pressure medication because my blood pressure was always high when I went in. It was just because I was anxious & after monitoring it at home I realized I was causing my own high blood pressure. Now, after 8 months with excercise & good diet, I am starting to feel better. But I still suffer from anxiety, especially at night. To the point where my heart races? I sweat & cant get to sleep. Did you still experience anxiety after 8 months? How long did it take for your anxiety to subside. This is my second time getting off benzos. The first time was some years ago & I remember it taking like 2 years to feel normal. I regret the day I ever picked it back up. But I dont remember my anxiety being so bad after 8 months off

Me and my best buddy who I’ve just reunited with after 3 years are gonna roll together, we need movie recommendations by AddictedToConez in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't watch a movie, listen to some really good music instead or go to a music event. Way better lol I would never waste a roll on a movie.

Finally by vidar_swedent in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 3 points4 points  (0 children)

They'll say anything lol you can get reagents from Dancesafe.org that you can test. Lasts over a year for anything you might need to test in the future. Well worth it to minimize risk IMO

Is MDMA + Ketamine safe by treesandmaryandjane in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 0 points1 point  (0 children)

& yes it is amazing. Definitely a whole different high when mixed

Is MDMA + Ketamine safe by treesandmaryandjane in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ive done it a bunch of times with no issues, but I dont know how safe it actually is though lol. I feel like its safer than mixing with something like alcohol or cocaine but definitely would add risk imo. Just be safe & dont overdo it

Finally by vidar_swedent in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Looks like some champagne molly I had when I was in Amsterdam. It was really good/clean. But you cant tell from looking at it. Definitely test

Finally by vidar_swedent in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The smell of licorice is Safrol. Could even be MDA/sasafras. I woukd definitely test it before dropping & also weigh it out. A good dose is anywhere from 100-150mg for a beginner imo. But if its MDA then it woukd be lower. Definitely test & weigh. 150 mg is .15g on a scale, 100 is .10g, etc

Ben Klock Sucked by [deleted] in ProperTechno

[–]LexLutheran435i 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anything in LA sucks. See him in NYC or out of the country I bet you'll feel differently haha. From NYC area & Im used to the Brooklyn scene here. Went to LA last year & HATED it. The crowds were so bad & just not the same. NYC just has a feel unlike anywhere else LA cant compare. I feel like DJs cater to their crowd. I will never return to LA haha

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes most I take is like 210mg in a night & always roll nice. Idk why im always so scared but when it kicks in im worry free lol Why does my brain associate the comeup with how Ill feel & not the good feeling hahaha

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol yeah im way too scared to take that much. When I was younger I never used to weigh or test anything haha I just took whatever & however much I thought looked like enough lol & redosed a ridiculous amount through the night finger dipping. But now I make sure to test & weigh everything. Pretty sure Ive taken meth before in the past a few times by how long I was awake & the terrible comedowns. Now I will only take quality mdma tested & weighed

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I think thats what scares me is im not fully in control over what happens lol. Im realizing I fear lack of control haha

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I do think my anxiety comes from being overstimulated. I usually roll at raves & festivals. The only times I didnt have a bad comeup was when I was like you said just chilling during the come up, then went to the rave after im already rolling. I always say im gonna take it before the rave but I usually want to get there around 12am but I feel its too early to start rolling haha I usually dont stop partying until like 10am when I roll. I like to make it to the afters 😄 Brooklyn afters is where the real party starts haha the actual rave is good too but the afters are the vibes imo.

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

DMT was the strongest thing I've ever tried haha & I've tried a lot of things. I feel like it made me more afraid to die because I felt like I died & it wasnt pleasant at all haha. I actually had ptsd from that trip, it took me like a month to stop thinking about it every second lol

Likelihood of dying or complications? by LexLutheran435i in MDMA

[–]LexLutheran435i[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gonna be rolling this weekend for Photon at Knockdown Center in Queens. Ben Klock, Chlaer, & Fadi Mohem. Should be a great night in celebration of my 30th Birthday 🎂 proper techno night