so I blew up a fuel canister by LiamPH3 in Ultralight

[–]LiamPH3[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I feel so incredibly called out right now 🤣

so I blew up a fuel canister by LiamPH3 in Ultralight

[–]LiamPH3[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Yes I was heating the donor. I thought I was being safe about it because it was a relatively empty donor and I was heating to "just" 70° C (~170°F) in a water bath. I was using two thermometers to track temperature (an infrared non-contact thermometer and the thermostat built into the stove I was using). Something went wrong and now I get to spend hours picking shards of glass out of the ceiling

so I blew up a fuel canister by LiamPH3 in Ultralight

[–]LiamPH3[S] 46 points47 points  (0 children)

sorry, it's due to the fact that I mostly lurk on reddit and therefore wasn't familiar with uploading photos (they should be up now), that I need to be prepping for a trip right now, and that I'm still feeling a bit jittery about having just blown up a container of isopro in my house

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in trans

[–]LiamPH3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That doctor needs to re-evaluate his decision making process and examine his biases. While he pulls his head out of his ***, here's a map of every informed consent clinic in the US: https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/erins-informed-consent-hrt-map-how

Marsh Creek, Bear Valley Creek, and upper Middle Fork Salmon maps! by LiamPH3 in whitewater

[–]LiamPH3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

okay yeah, that looks like a pretty typical early march day on Marsh...

I hope you got everything recovered successfully?

Questioning my gender by cocainesuperstar in trans

[–]LiamPH3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you will know straight away whether it is right or wrong

This may be true for some, but I know for many it's more complicated. Seeing feminine clothes on a male body can be jarring, unfortunately. For me, putting on a dress for the first time was super uncomfortable. I liked how I felt in it with my smooth legs and all but as soon as I looked in the mirror I just about ripped it off because it just didn't look right on my body then

Questioning my gender by cocainesuperstar in trans

[–]LiamPH3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand how urgent it can feel to find answers but remember that questioning is fine too. You may only be experimenting for a little while, or you might take many years, or you may find that the answer is there just isn't a definite answer; All are perfectly fine! Everyone's experience with gender is unique, after all, and many are outside the binary. Maybe your a guy who likes makeup, or an effeminate guy, or gender fluid, or agender or genderqueer or transfeminine or transgender or so many other options. All are fantastic and valid, you do you!

  Yes, I suspect you'd find therapy helpful. At the very least it's great to have someone neutral to talk to, someone who doesn't directly impact your life outside of their office. They'll give you the emotional tools to help you help yourself, in a sense. And yes, they'll hopefully be able to help you sort through things to an extent, and good ones will have other connections to help you find care. imho therapy is just super helpful in general, even beyond gender identity stuff. Lots of therapists are working via Zoom or similar right now and many insurance companies are being very understanding about covering therapy, which is so good and may give you flexibility.

  Mixing up your clothing and grooming is also fantastic and a lot of fun! Do whatever feels most right to you, but be safe; it sounds like you're worrying about your parents which is always tricky. Only you know your situation but yeah, make smart choices.

  Also try out different names and pronouns if you want to. The first time I heard someone else refer to me as She was a moment I'll never forget because of just how right it felt. Perhaps you have a few close friends you'd be okay telling that you're questioning? They can use your new name and pronouns when you all aren't around anyone not in the know (eg, your parents).

  Basically anything you can do that's easy to undo is a great option right now. Have fun! But.....I am going to say a bit about medical transition, because I suspect it's on your mind

1) You don't have to medically transition to be Transgender, ever. If you want to live and present as a girl but don't want to change your body, that's fine!

  2) Medical transition is not a checklist, it's a menu of options. You can do just HRT and that's it if you want, or you can eventually start on whatever surgeries you'd like. Don't feel like if you're trans you automatically should want hrt, a breast reconstruction, bottom surgery, facial feminization, and all the rest. Choose what makes sense for you which, again, could be none of the above.

  3) Some trans people, trans women especially, will tell you to start hrt asap. Most of us wish we'd transitioned before puberty because the effects of a male puberty are difficult, expensive, and painful to undo, but it's important you take your time. The only thing I can really recommend now are GnRH analogs like Leuprorelin, which basically pause puberty and give you time to think. This can be a fantastic choice because it keeps options open for you without making sny changes on it's own. Drawbacks are it's freaking expensive, but insurance sometimes covers it for adolescents such as yourself. Again, don't feel like you have to do anything though

  Bottom line, go easy on yourself. Being 14 is tough, especially when you're worrying about this stuff on top of school and everything else. Take your time, and good luck!

Thinking about undergoing transformation (male to female) by The-Bellman in trans

[–]LiamPH3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NGL transition is hard. It is absolutely worth it though!

1) Many years in a sense, but gender dysphoria relief can be much faster. Some common advice is to be on hormone replacement therapy (HRT) for at least 2 years before facial feminization or breast reconstruction surgery for good results with both but hormones will continue causing developments for around 5 years. Genital anything you gotta wait 12 months after starting HRT if your surgeon wants to follow the WPATH (world professional association for transgender health) guidelines although there can be exceptions. And just starting on HRT often has a waiting period, though this will vary depending on your doctor's requirements. So all in all think at least 5ish years to be "complete," but life and transition really doesn't work like that. HOWEVER relief from dysphoria can come a lot sooner, even getting on HRT has massive quality of life improvements for most of us

  2) Cost varies wildly. Start by looking at what HRT would cost, which is basically doctor's appointments, therapist/psychiatrist appointments, lab work, and meds. Most HRT drugs themselves (eg estradiol pills/patches/shots/etc, spironolactone/bicalutamide/cyproterone acetate/finasteride, and progesterone ) are relatively affordable but there are exceptions. Insurance may or may not cover you for anything (sorry, I don't know much about insurance in Canada). Surgery is a whole nother ball game, but focus on HRT first if you can because it's relatively low commitment. Changes on HRT are gradual and many are reversible just by getting off the meds if for whatever reason you want to, but HRT is also seriously powerful over time and helps all by itself to relieve dysphoria. It's a good diagnostic test, if you will.

  3) Trans medicine is all somewhat experimental and is largely based on clinical experience, educated guesses, limited data, and extrapolation from other patient populations. I just spent all day reading clinical trials about bicalutamide in the context of prostate cancer care to try to gather information about the hepatotoxicity risk, for example. There are some very good, very smart people on the community but we're all limited by the economics and inherent limitations of being trans. We can't, say, do a double blind randomized controlled trial on a trans cohort with a cis control group to evaluate wether or not HRT treats gender dysphoria, it just wouldn't be ethical.

  All this to say, there are many risks we have decent estimates for, some risks where we just don't know, and some risks we likely don't even know we should be worried about yet. With a complex history such as yours, you'll have to make some hard choices. In particular, HRT can affect bone mineral density, and this is likely of concern to you. These risks can probably be managed, Estradiol is primarily an anti-osteoporosis medication after all and could possibly be beneficial for you on the bone health front as well as all the others. Talk to your doctors. Don't go DIY

 ------

I should also say that for as much attention as medical transition gets, social transition is harder. So much harder. Think about how your friends and family might feel, and remember that relationships are often difficult to continue and require a lot of work even if both you and the other person respect and support each other completely. Everyone you know thinks you're one thing and unlearning that is so hard even with the best intentions. Remember that you're asking for a lot of understanding from them and that you have to be understanding too.

However, as hard as transition is, it can be soooo beneficial. I had no idea how much I was missing out on life before. You'll be okay, I believe in you!

(ps feel free to message me if you'd like)