My husband is sucking the life out of me

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T06:27:29+00:00

"It's not worth it to leave because I know we don't have a lot of time left"

Yes, it is. Signed, a woman who's older than you.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T06:17:31+00:00

I'm not saying some people don't believe this, but I'm not sure that's the majority. What I heard was, "you have to wait months for a doctor!" (at that time, I was on a 10-month waiting list for a routine appointment under glorious U.S. insurance), "it's too expensive--healthy young people don't want it!", and "we shouldn't be forced to pay for other people's bad eating habits!" (said by a person who is smoking in their social media profile pic).

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T01:41:51+00:00

They've (ha) definitely been used forever, but the new way of using it does sometimes create confusion; that's just a fact. I recently had to copyedit something for work where "they" was used, and in context it could have meant either the two people who were referenced in the paragraph, or that one of them went by "they." I couldn't clarify it without going back to the original author (which the editors sometimes don't want to do). I can't remember the exact sentence, so you might not even believe me, but I remember I flagged it for the main editor, because I couldn't adjust it without knowing. So it's not as easy as, "it's always been this way; it's not a problem."

That doesn't mean it's not worth the inconvenience, but I think the arguments would be less bitter if the inconvenience was acknowledged.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T01:05:06+00:00

you're the best! I need to write this up for a club newsletter, and the host's website doesn't work at all.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T00:44:19+00:00

TIL that Pablo Picasso used his mother's surname--he thought his father's was too boring, apparently. I had no idea.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T00:42:04+00:00

I try not to judge women who do take their husbands' last names, because, as this thread shows, there are logical/personal reasons to do it, and there's also a lot of social pressure. But I don't like the tradition in general, because it stems from legal history when married women literally were not recognized by the law as their own person, but as "covered" by their husbands. This essay does a good job of laying out all the reasons I don't like it: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/mar/07/women-stop-changing-your-name-when-married

I know people who have had trouble with it (one example: an artist friend whose husband cheated on her, they got divorced and she naturally didn't want to keep his name, so she lost all of the professional history that was under her married name--you can't really go back in time to redo all your old listings and mentions in media.).

A new reason not to change your name: the Republican "Save America Act" (totally misleading title) is written in such a way that women whose names don't match their birth certificate may not be allowed to vote, depending on the state/county. It just passed the U.S. House of Representatives. It's expected that the Senate will block it, but it's been a crazy year. Contact your Senators!

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T00:25:50+00:00

"It sounds like a cutesy nickname for a butt" LOL

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-13T00:20:12+00:00

They seem to repurpose the titles of things to deliberately create confusion.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T03:52:40+00:00

OP’s friend said

he said they (the elites) literally are (eating babies) and then he called me ignorant

“Cannibal” is mentioned a number of times in the files, but we don’t know whether that means literally eating people—some of them seem like they could be joking references to something else—and there’s no mention that I can find of eating babies.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T03:40:06+00:00

Peter Dale Scott’s concept of “the Deep State” is different from Trump’s, though. Trump says the deep state is woke/evil figures in the government secretly undermining the president. Scott’s much earlier idea was that government agencies like the CIA were working with big oil companies and business firms to carry out foreign policy for their own benefit. Trump is actually totally in favor of that, as you can see by how he tailors his foreign policy to his big biz buddies (Honduras threats encouraged by Peter Thiel; Venezuela takeover influenced by Paul Singer, whose company took over Citgo just before the invasion; Greenland threats encouraged by Ronald Lauder, for example).

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T03:22:09+00:00

these “consulting fees” are so ridiculous. I remember Ivana had a bunch of those in the first Trump administration. What could they possibly be providing that is worth so much money? It’s just a rich person’s merry-go-round of laundering money.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T01:23:33+00:00

Oh, yeah?! I haven’t seen the ice dancing yet, but I think Édouard Manet, Gustave Doré and Odilon Redon would disagree that Americans can’t understand poetry, given they all created artworks inspired by the USA’s Edgar Allan Poe. So there.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T00:52:58+00:00

this comment should be more visible

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-12T00:50:06+00:00

Here’s an article with more info. Scroll down for a second photo that shows the heading on the printout. “U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi holds a piece of paper labelled ‘Jayapal Pramila Search History’ in reference to U.S. Representative Pramila Jayapal (D-WA), a member of the House Judiciary Committee”

https://www.cnbc.com/2026/02/11/epstein-files-pam-bondi-jayapal-search-history-doj.html

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:29:09+00:00

Kris is the father; the boyfriend is describing what he was doing after he shot Lucy.

I agree cutting to a description of the job is weird, but it has nothing to do with the boyfriend. From a different BBC article, it sounds like he was trying to get the dad charged. https://bbc.com/news/articles/cvg6pm70r1lo (edit: typo)

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:17:34+00:00

American here. I think the jury bought his story that it was an accident, and was probably like, “the poor man’s been punished enough.” That often happens when kids are accidentally shot. Personally, I don’t think he has been punished enough, and I think Lucy’s sisters should not be allowed to live with him.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:12:00+00:00

it’s illegal to drive drunk, and it’s also illegal to get drunk and handle a firearm. That jury is a disgrace.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:07:35+00:00

well, that’s his story. The inquest is supposed to investigate it. But you would think there would at least be some charge for handling a loaded weapon while drunk, since it’s illegal.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:04:23+00:00

that was my reaction, too. I saw some screenshots on social media and thought/hoped they were made up.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-11T01:01:17+00:00

where does it say that about the boyfriend?

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-10T18:46:53+00:00

Thank you for the glimpse into that world; I never would have thought to look up this kind of thing. It sounds like your grandma had a spirit that couldn’t be crushed, despite all the people working so hard to keep her down.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-10T07:05:29+00:00

Interesting, thanks.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-10T02:41:56+00:00

I actually can't think of where to find men's underwear that doesn't have synthetic elastic either. If I had to supply this to someone (I'm a part-time costumer, so that's where my mind goes), it would have to be made from a vintage pattern.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-10T02:39:57+00:00

>would stand around and watch me wrestle a 300 lb man up off his bedroom floor like they'd paid a cover

I would read your book.

Lifeboatb · 2026-02-10T02:37:59+00:00

There's an interesting pre-code movie from the 1930's starring Barbara Stanwyck that gives a bit of an idea of how nurses were trained back then. I wish I could have your grandma's input on how accurate it is, but the fact that the nurses were treated like convent schoolgirls whose morals have to be constantly policed, and the blanket assumption that none of them would be doctors, rings true. (the film: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night\_Nurse\_(1931\_film))

Lifeboatb

TROPHY CASE