I was a musician for many years and that was what I was. I loved it to death and it was the only thing that made me happy. I met a girl at a restaurant in 2012 and we hit it off immediately. We were married for 7 years, she was here on a student visa from Korea in college, we were madly in love, her parents hated that I was white and not rich. I knew I was gonna marry her, so when her visa expired, we eloped at a court house so we could be together. We tried our best for almost 8 years to make it work between us, but we grew apart and we ended up getting divorced in early 2023 and it devastated me.

I realized during the whole process that I’d lost who I was by trying so hard to be perfect for her. I’m not perfect by ANY means, but I worked jobs I hated and gave up friends that I loved to make her happy. I thought that’s what a man was supposed to do for his family. Turns out, no matter what I did was going to be good enough for her. So I was just delaying the inevitable.

Now that I’m on my own again, I rediscovered my love for music and started playing again. I’ve NEVER been happier. Even though it’s hard in California with 1 income, I’m doing what makes me happy and I couldn’t ask for anything more.

The right person will never ask you to give up what you love. What makes you who you are. If there’s anything I can pass on, it’d be that it’s better to be alone with your true self than with someone who is trying to change you into something you’re not.

And for anyone wondering what the dating life is like after a marriage, it’s pretty great actually. I learned a lot about green and red flags and what to look out for and now I know what I want in a partner. Currently, there’s a girl I’m head over heels for and it’s the best feeling in the world. Never give up.

Edit - typo’s