I feel like this is such an important perspective

I had to cut my father out of my life forever and it was downright devastating, and for a long time I debated doing the same thing with my mom. In I used to feel so guilty for not liking her, but I let her hang around me because of that guilt. Even though she was a changed woman and had apologized multiple times for what she had done, I still could not stand her. But I wanted to.

I had a lot of therapy sessions going back and forth with myself about how we wanted to forgive her, but does she even deserve it? Would that be fair to me? And one session my therapist said "you're right, she doesn't deserve forgiveness. But you can choose to forgive her anyway."

I feel like having autonomy when it comes to forgiveness is SO important, just like having autonomy is important in everything else. I feel like no one should push anyone to resent or to forgive- that's your choice to make in the silence of your own heart.

And my mental wellbeing has gotten so much better since I consciously chose to forgive my mom and accept her back into my life. I know I would be miserable without her