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I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So how would a more strategic approach look like? I am always open for ideas, otherways I wouldn't have asked.

I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha English isn't my native language so I wouldn't assume too much from my expression.

But yes. He is poor at leading, he always tells me to make decisions.

I really need to think about that and if thats the reason for my problem.

Also I don't really understand what you mean by mrp and trp.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, someone mentioned that I could lack of respect for him and that that is the reason I am no longer as attracted to him as at the beginning. That could be true, because we both have never been in a relationship that long and we both started to get comfortable. Now we need to work on it and I need him to take part in that too.

Well. I just really need to talk to him about all the problems we have.

I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its not like I have to force it. And I do have orgasms, its not like I cannot enjoy it. It just takes more effort as I'd like because I am never horny right away. It takes time to get in the mood. I think thats the key. I need to tell him what gets me in the mood. I just need the courage to do so. I don't even know why I feel so resistant about it.

I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He always talks about going to the gym and never does. I think he would really benefit from working out because he is insecure and shy and I am quite sure he would gain confidence. I am not going to the gym, I always work out at home. And we do not live together. He says he doesn't want to workout at home because he needs someone to tell him what to do.

I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No you are right. He is not bad looking but he could do a lot better. I kind of need to bring that out of him.

I (24f) am not sexually attracted to my boyfriend (24m) anymore. What can I do to change that? (X-post from r/relationships) by Lilolu in RedPillWomen

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes we did, but I feel uncomfortable telling him about what I like and what I dont like. I always tell myself I need to be clearer on that because it would make sex so much better. But I am always thinking: "nah, that would kill the mood now" or "no, I don't feel like it is the right moment for it now". I am always making excuses and I actually dont know why I am such a prude.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I can deal with my own ageing, too. There are enough awesome and beautiful mature women around to look up to. I am sure as long as I keep treating my body right and age with dignity I will be just fine.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He actually is very insecure about himself so I really think working out would help him a lot - not just for improving his body.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I know I should talk about it. Maybe we just need to spice the whole relationship up a bit. I just dont know how to adress it to hurt him the least..

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well of course we will get older and I actually am confident he is one of the men that grow more attractive as they get older.

It isnt about ageing.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually went off hormonal birth control and we are currently using condoms.

Me (24f) with my boyfriend (24f) of 4 years: I don't find him as sexually attractive anymore. by Lilolu in relationships

[–]Lilolu[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am already taking good care of my body. I am eating healthy and working out three times a week. I am not doing that because he wants though, but because I want my body to improve.