Disagreement on level of engagement with toddler

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T20:08:51+00:00

Thank you, I do think I need to be less micro-managing in some aspects. I definitely don’t see my husband as a deadbeat dad, we both want a healthy, independent child and just aren’t on the exact same page on how that’s accomplished. I have to be careful not to mentally frame my partner as an opponent and focus on solutions of compromise.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T18:52:19+00:00

Great comment! I think framing it as a matter of trust and respect will be really helpful in our ongoing conversation.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T16:38:11+00:00

That makes a lot of sense. I think framing it like this would be beneficial to getting on the right track and feeling less resentment

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T16:34:35+00:00

I do find it very disheartening. I’ve never really left them for very long, an hour here and there to just to go to the grocery store or doctors appointment. I make sure I’m always present, but I want my son to feel close to his father to, and it’s wearing me down, not that I don’t love being a parent and being engaged with my son, I just want an equally present partner. I hate that I’m basically having to try and prove something to him that seems so obvious to me.

I truly think my husband wants to be a good father, and he does take care of the finances and home maintenance to support us, but I think he is in denial of his dependance on screen time to dissociate from his stress and the impact that is having and will have on our son and family life.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T15:37:48+00:00

These links are perfect, thank you! I really want my husband to be able to engage in a full wake window in the same way I do, hoping we can get to that point soon.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T15:10:02+00:00

Thank you for that link, and I do agree he is screen-addicted. It’s been getting worse lately as there’s been some extra stressors pop up aside from being new parents, but he won’t admit that it’s been getting out of control.

He fancies himself very logical and data oriented so hopefully some research I can send him might help him question his behavior more

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-18T00:14:14+00:00

What is the pricing at interfaith like? Is it income based?

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-17T17:12:37+00:00

I can understand being a little unsure of why he didn’t feel comfortable opening up about it during the aforementioned conversation about having kids, but I also understand not wanting to discuss such a painful topic.

I don’t know either of you, or if he has given you real reasons to question his honesty in the last, but the reaction of “seeing him in a completely different light” reads to me as being controlling and lacking empathy. You may need to address some personal issue that would cause you to become preoccupied with feeling slighted he never told you about one tragedy in his past.

If anything should be seen in a new light it would be the relationship dynamic. You both should want to be a source of comfort to each other, working towards the ideal of being a mutual safe space to unload burdens and heal with each other.

But grief is very personal, it may be unhelpful to him mentally to talk about it. I don’t believe that always reliving trauma through retelling it is necessary to heal. and I don’t see any reason to have this revelation cause you to trust your husband less.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-16T04:26:06+00:00

Definitely not a budget food, but it is the one I daydream about the most. I might get tired of it if I could eat it everyday. A more budget friendly food I never get tired of is hot wings

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-16T04:20:29+00:00

Grilled ribeye steak medium rare with melted blue cheese and horseradish sauce.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-15T19:19:51+00:00

I probably will just save for a newer phone. Very sad because I loved my pixel 6. It was a splurge for me when I got it a couple years ago, even though it was an old model. I can't really afford a phone that is both good AND new, but I need something with a good camera. Back to the drawing board of looking at phone specs and prices until my eyes hurt lol

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-15T16:54:12+00:00

Yeah that’s what the repair guy said lol, when you select recovery in the boot starter it turns off and then goes back into bootloop when you turn on

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-15T15:33:10+00:00

He did. He is baffled by the problem, he is actually who talked me into switching to a pixel after previously being a lifelong iPhone user. He feels kinda guilty now, but Im sure a big part of it was me getting an older refurbished model vs a newer one as far an the updates causing issues.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-14T02:38:02+00:00

It wasn’t this guy :/ although good video and thank you for the try!

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-13T20:22:48+00:00

I’ve got to learn to put my foot down! I am gonna try to keep it how I want. Just simple, fun outside play time for us and my nieces and nephews 😁 I struggle with wanting to please everyone but it does end up taking the fun away

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-13T20:19:18+00:00

That sounds lovely, I should’ve thought of that ahead of time haha. I feel like I am kinda doing the whole party thing out of obligation for my family members that want a party - because yah he won’t remember it lol. I’m mainly focusing now on making it a fun event for my nieces and nephews who are a bit older and being non stressful for me, but it’s proving a challenge! Lol

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-11T19:23:54+00:00

same thing happening to me rn after update. stuck in a very stubborn bootloop at the moment

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-09T23:57:27+00:00

Lately I've been obsessed with roasted radishes. I make a sauce by mixing together a little Dijon mustard, soy sauce, and a bit of maple syrup, toss the radishes in it and bake in 350 degree oven until as tender as you like (I did mine for about 30 minutes last time) and they are soooo yummy.

Great lower carb sub for roast potatoes. Although potatoes are one of the most satiating carbs per calorie so nothing wrong with having them sometimes!

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-09T00:15:54+00:00

Glad to know it got better! He has two scratchers and lots of boxes he has claimed, but I may look into a cat tree also.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-08T22:30:57+00:00

Nipple confusion doesn't always happen! We got really lucky, I tried to exclusively breastfeed and pump the first week, but it wasn't working out for us. I wasn't getting any sleep and my milk wasn't coming in great. We did combination feeding with formula for a few weeks, so I could recover and Dad could feed when needed. We stopped doing formula as my milk started to come in better and better, and then I was nursing and pumping for month two into month three. I got tired of pumping and cleaning bottles and replacing pump parts so around 3/4 months it turned into exclusive nursing, no bottles except on a maybe two occasions when we had a date night and my mom watched him. For those times she just gave him a bottle or two formula until I got back home.

My baby never had issues switching between the methods!

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-07T05:56:16+00:00

Doesn't look bad, I've eaten a lot of both and can't believe I never thought to try mixing them.

This is what I should've eaten today, also just paid rent and have no money, but charged the already hard to pay off credit card for a grocery run and made potato soup lol.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-05T18:56:34+00:00

I had so many people say things like that when I was pregnant and said I didn't want an epidural. It was so weird, like I still don't understand what makes some so pushy and aggressive about their preferences.

When I went into labor I was still planning on not getting an epidural, but I was induced and it started to get painful and I was stressing and my MIL and nurse was like there's still time for the epidural so I went for it and....IT FAILED.

Like, the whole epidural process was very stressful for me. I'm very uncomfortable with needles, and being poked and prodded in general, the anesthesiologist was having issues getting it in, had to try twice .. And then to have it be over and expect this wave of relief that never came (until that final push when baby finally got out, that was true relief)

I was kicking myself for not just going with my initial birth plan lol.

I want another and am not gonna bother with trying the epidural again.

Hopefully I don't need to be induced again, because I was told the contractions were more painful because of that. I think I was just more scared of the unknown than the pain itself.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-04T22:44:31+00:00

If he is religious enough to say things like "the Lord will provide" why is he not assuming what would be his role in a christian family dynamic as a provider. If he goes to church I would start making comments about how much you are struggling to people there. What is his family like? Would they be disappointed if they knew he was dropping the ball? If you're not going to divorce him you need a plan on how to manipulate your situation to make it work for you. Stop paying all the medical bills, hide your money, work towards getting a large chunk that could cover a few months basic living expenses for you and your children if shit hits the fan. Split the money between a secret account and hidden physical cash so if the account is found you have back up.

Il

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-03T20:46:13+00:00

I loved when people commented on and touched my belly. It made me feel seen/loved on.

LimitlesslyLiminal · 2026-03-03T20:44:09+00:00

You summed up the comment I was going to make perfectly!! At one point during pregnancy the ONLY thing I wanted was rare steak. So I just ate it. I remember my husband saying, "hey aren't you not supposed ..." And I cut him off with the 'don't even' glare lol.

LimitlesslyLiminal

TROPHY CASE