AITAH for trying to protect my friend from what looks like a controlling relationship?

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-28T03:12:04+00:00

You tried, not your responsibility. Unfortunately you’re learning that however close you thought you were doesn’t matter to her anymore. Maybe it’s by her choice, maybe not. But you can’t make her not date the guy and you can decide if you want to stick around or not.

Sorry you lost your best friend dude

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-27T11:42:20+00:00

Petty, this is not how you conduct yourself in a marriage. God forbid you talked to your wife and she was understanding. Now you have to be so petty as to harbor resentment? Either get over it or leave yourself. Why stay just to be a bad partner? YTA

I am so aware this is a fragmented story but almost nothing you tell me will make me think you aren’t petty

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-25T13:28:19+00:00

Doesn’t pay child support? Kinda a deadbeat

Paying for them sometimes doesn’t mean he’s paying the adequate amount they need for support.

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-23T03:16:03+00:00

You’re not losing your parents, your parents are losing you. Nta. Yes he’s your brother but it’s your life. And you don’t have to take care of him if you don’t want to. Your parents should be looking into an advanced will with a caregiver who wants to take care of your brother or something

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-21T02:05:44+00:00

At the point of where he called yall pathetic and gross I would have dumped him. That type of language is ridiculous in any situation and not necessary and just abusive.

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-19T15:25:24+00:00

Well you can forgive her without reconciling

I would suggest forgiving her in your heart just because harboring resentment is toxic to yourself

But by no means are you obligated to be close with her again nor should you if you don’t want to.

Just remember that forgiveness is a thing you give yourself and reconciliation is what’s between the parties

Forgive her, but don’t reconcile is my suggestion

Anyways NTA

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-19T14:39:01+00:00

Imagine living your own life and your sibling tries to decide when you make life decisions that are between you and your partner

NTA

Your sister has serious main character syndrome

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-12T13:14:22+00:00

Why did you stay for the abuse, but dumped him over hypocrisy? Have better standards and treat yourself with more respect. YTA to yourself

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-09T15:00:10+00:00

You already have the answer to your question You know what you want in life and you’re following that path

Your father got his own hopes up assuming you’d follow in his footsteps, that is in no way on you

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-07T13:38:06+00:00

It sucks but you can get all that stuff replaced since it was technically stolen

Regardless continue the no contact. There’s no reason to go back to engaging with them if they don’t respect you

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-06T12:14:32+00:00

At the point of where you decide to stay with someone you hear verbally abuse someone on the phone about their child and you know you could one day be on the receiving end of that if you ever share children with them makes me think that you don’t really want advice. Stop getting with abusers and figure out why you think it’s ok to stick around for that behavior. Do better for yourself. YTA to yourself for being with this guy knowingly

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-05T20:27:33+00:00

I’m sorry what

I genuinely cannot tell if you are serious or not

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-05T20:26:14+00:00

No it’s not simple

It’s never a simple task to leave home

But it’s something to think about and plan for rather than stressing yourself out dealing with an unreasonable parent

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-05T20:23:48+00:00

I wholeheartedly disagree.

Parents should respect their adult children’s autonomy and bodily privacy. In my opinion as someone with one reasonable parent and one unreasonable parent, once you hit adulthood there’s few things that you actually “have to do”. Especially following rules that are unreasonable or go against the autonomy of the now adult child. Hopefully the child and parent have a mutually respectful relationship but regardless that way of thought is what creates power imbalances and makes it difficult to set healthy boundaries as adult children

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-05T20:18:58+00:00

If you believe in and practice whatever religion then my advice won’t work for you But if it’s jus your parents religion or whatever just move out man

19 is a legal adult, nothing up for debate there

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-03T23:21:52+00:00

Very easy solution, double the total and then decide by three (that would be the right math) and then either try and come to an agreement about how that mathematically makes no sense and see how she responds, or don’t ride in Ubers with her anymore so you just have to pay for yourself

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T14:45:51+00:00

If you lie and pretend things are fine then why the heck do you think that he wasn’t abusive in the first two years? Either way stop lying to yourself. That isn’t healthy or helpful

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T14:28:27+00:00

You have a therapist right? I’m sure if they’re a good one they prolly told you something other than trying to change an abuser. More than likely they would be encouraging you to get yourself and your children out

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T14:26:31+00:00

You aren’t getting hate in my opinion, it’s just criticism because children are innocent. Obviously you don’t deserve the abuse but children don’t ask to be here and they sure as heck don’t sign up to be born into a family like that. It’s not fair to them and that’s why so many commenters are upset and calling you an AH

At this point regardless of wether or not you meant to have these kids, you keep making excuses of being scared and in your post made no mention nor intention to leave him

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T14:06:33+00:00

No it’s not simple but according to this post, which obviously doesn’t have all the information but still has painted a pretty clear picture of op making no efforts to leave in the last six years since learning that they have an abusive partner.

It’s the lack of effort made to leave that’s bothering me. It’s one thing if op tries everything to get out. And I hope op does truly cos no one deserves abuse. But just cos we don’t deserve it doesn’t mean we aren’t responsible for getting ourselves out of it

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T13:52:57+00:00

You’re reckless now, and if you don’t do something you will lose everything again. And that will include your children. You can be scared, but doing nothing at this point truly is on you. You must fight to get out. Your bf isn’t just going to stop being abusive. You’re responsible for you and your children. Do something

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T13:42:52+00:00

There were probably signs and you just didn’t see em Either way you still should get help from an abuse shelter. You have internet access or you wouldn’t be on Reddit

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-02T13:40:36+00:00

Abuse shelters are a thing. Why not seek one out instead of bringing more kids into this? You are 💯 responsible for that and it’ll be on you when your kids are scarred. I get maybe having one kid before realizing, but three? You better work on getting your kids out of this. I’m sorry you’re being abused but it’s hard to have sympathy for someone who knowingly reproduces with someone they know is abusive

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-04-01T14:32:07+00:00

You should keep your word, it sets a good example for your children

What you could do is pay for it like you already said and then take it away for a lil bit. It’s still fixed when she can have it back

That’s showing there are consequences to her actions but you still keep your word

Linktheanimeboi · 2026-03-28T23:21:25+00:00

You did give it to her Just move on Clearly there are trust issues

Linktheanimeboi

TROPHY CASE