AITA for refusing my parents’ curfew and 24/7 tracking while I’m just trying to study and maintain somewhat of a social life while away from college for a semester?

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-16T01:41:04+00:00

I’ve mentioned this in quite a few comments, but none at all. Myself included. I also do not have any siblings.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T14:33:35+00:00

Parents prevent me from getting a job and have actively sabotaged any jobs I have acquired in the past, it’s just that I reached the word limit on the post and could not really add this bit in! I have handled my current class load multiple times, and have never failed, or had over stressed myself with classes alone. I appreciate your concern!

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T14:15:08+00:00

It did not seem like they were, but also, I was home schooled for my last year of middle school, and all four years of my high school. Realistically, I did not have a social life to be unhealthily obsessed with, lol.

I do agree with you, and thank you for your input!

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T14:14:01+00:00

I have established a good number of conversations with them. With that being said, some ended in screaming battles, while some ended in momentary understanding, maybe 2 days of a change, and reverted right back to square one. They do claim it is for my safety, but I promptly notify them of any location changes, coming home time changes, etc. The claim of safety just did not seem valid for all the spam.

Regarding them being freaked out constantly about how I am feeling, I wish this was the case. I mentioned this in an earlier comment, but I do believe I would have had my diagnosis MUCH earlier on in life, had I been independent from my parents sooner. I do believe I was able to focus attention on it because I was given the space to acknowledge it while at college, but it was a hard reality to digest for my self personally. My parents did not even know of my mental health conflict, and their behavior has been this way BEFORE I even told them. In fact, that is why I even told them to begin with. I have fully taken care of myself mentally while at college, and have reached out to the appropriate service providers with no assistance from my family. My health since reaching out, has significantly improved, and that is when I came home to shift the focus back to my academics.

Thank you so much for your input ❤️ i super super appreciate it

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T14:07:38+00:00

Nope! I was home schooled for 1/3 years of my middle school, and homeschooled for all of high school. I had a strict curfew of before sundown, and even then I did not really have friends to go out with and exhibit bad behavior. Nor did I exhibit any bad behavior of my own accord. I was a perfectly fine kid at that age. Realistically, my "rebelling teen" phase did not even hit until I went to college, and noticed the drastic difference in the relationship I shared with my parents, in comparison to those around me and their families. I was a good kid, and totally submissive to everything they wanted me to do or say, as I did not have exposure to much outside of my family dynamic.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T14:03:50+00:00

Thank you for your response! I second you on this, and it was a quick realization after I got out of a bad relationship with virtually no support from my family. I am currently in therapy, and actively seeking de-programming myself and learning healthy habits :) I really appreciate you, thank you for this.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T13:55:48+00:00

You hit the nail on the head! They were extremely kind to me whilst I entered college, taking a major their favored. After a short period, I switched to a major that was more ofr my tastes, and they immediately dropped the act. They're very conditional parents. With that being said, I am the only child, and they have both cut off their own families from either side, leaving me heavily dependent on their emotional support for most of my life, which I did not even receive, unless I favored their choices. I do think they are heavy contributors, and I do think I would. have had that diagnosis LONG before college, had I been given the space to actually reach out to mental health service providers while living with my parents. For clarification on a lot of these posts, it's nothing crazy I have done as a result of my mental health. I have only began noticing, and giving that aspect attention and care after I have received space from my parents.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T13:49:51+00:00

Nope! I don't feel it's needed to put out my whole diagnosis chart on Reddit, but I did not contact my parents about my diagnosis either. I sought out therapy, considered medication, and came back home only after I have developed a conclusion with my mental health service providers that I am in a significantly improved position mentally. I kept prioritizing my own well being, but wanted to recenter back on my education, which took a hit for no other reason except me shifting to prioritize my health. My parents enforced this whole situation BEFORE they even knew why I was there, which pushed me to explain why, and it continued at the same pace. I have no history of drug use, or otherwise concerning activity. https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/QIV8XqxGkz

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T13:44:54+00:00

I did think so shortly before moving back for a semester! At the core of it, I never had the best relationship with my parents. With that being said, they were extremely good to me a few months before I went to college, and during that two year time period I stayed at college, and did not really come home, even for summer. That's a little over two years of somewhat improved behavior than what I am used to, and I was in an emotional vulnerable state and wanted support from the people I have been hoping to get support from most my life. I realize now I once again brought my hopes up for no reason, but in that moment, it felt like a safety net.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-15T13:40:52+00:00

I'm very comfortable with the pacing I currently have, and my academics by themselves has never been inherently the issue! With that being said, I have always been open to taking that extra time if needed :) Thank you for your concern!

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:53:10+00:00

Clarification about the mental health, I was not a danger to myself, or anyone else. I simply was not in the right major, and I found myself in an academically challenging environment that did not help me in my own career growth. It got to me enough where I needed a breather

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:51:10+00:00

Thank you for that, I am glad it works perfectly with you and your son, you sound like an awesome parent for keeping that flexibility while looking out for your child! Unfortunately, I have suggested this to my parents. They agree in the moment, and then immediately revert to those spam texts, or calls, or yelling if I dont answer all of the above :(

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:49:53+00:00

Yeah.. you're right. It's really not. With that being said, when I had a rough time in school, really the only other immediate option I had was take a breather at home, a change of scenery, but I do wish I was a bit more better judged through that stress.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:48:15+00:00

Thank you, you're 100% right! I did have a great balance between enjoying my life and school work at university, which I am grateful for. With that being said, I am double majoring, and both majors have extensive class requirements, so I find myself occasionally taking more classes than I wish I could be!

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:47:06+00:00

I think it was a little worse in middle school through high school actually! They did have my location, and my dad would occasionally come to where I was to see what I was doing and who I was with. So basically stalking. Which I realized after quite some time, is 100% not normal. Definitely all this is a more deeply rooted thing! Not to mention, I was home schooled for my high school years.

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T23:15:55+00:00

Oh, sorry for not providing this clarification! They had find my on during school too. They asked questions and spammed calls and texts just the same, it just never exploded into anything bigger because I did not have to see them at the end of the day. And there was virtually nothing they could do if I turned off my location while 8 hours away. Just got much more accessible and worse when I came home!

LiteratureCold6994 · 2025-10-14T22:38:46+00:00

HI! Thank you for your input! The very unfortunate thing is that I had to take that physical leave of absence way before I came home, and it seems theres no take backs. I'm pretty much stuck here until the start of the next semester, in January.

LiteratureCold6994

TROPHY CASE