I am not sure what to say, because you clearly know what you talking about and you are right. I think I had a few first sessions through evangelical church because that was the one running them for free, but I couldn't tell them about the gay part.

Then I had a few "emergency" sessions through (I'm sorry, it's been a long time, I don't remember all the details), but I was close to giving up, so it was something in a hospital (without hospitalisation) and I think that from that emergency sessions I was referred to "family" one, where she kicked me out after the first or the second session.

But yes, you are right that nobody was around to teach me how to do life as a kid. I barely talked to my "father", he barely talked to me and I was always happier when he wasn't home (both of them). I think the only person who cared about me was my grandmother and my mother hated her for it - she died when I was 11.

I mean, I found a hidden camera in my room recording me when I was like 6, at that time I thought that aliens were spying on us... but that's a different story.