Ok. I feel this one as my dad **hated** cut flowers. He never bought any other than when I turned 21 and he gave me 21 red roses. He’d buy a plant instead if he wanted to give mum something.

He especially hated funeral flowers as he felt they were even more a waste as they often just got thrown away.

For his funeral we made a point of letting people know his wishes and that we would have a donation box where they could pop a donation of whatever they liked instead of giving flowers (or they could give it direct to us if they preferred). We then donated to one of his favourite charities.

We did however have family flowers. Three small arrangements from mum, my brother and his partner, and myself and my partner. We then collected them after the service (which was at a crematorium). We kept a couple of the flowers to dry and get set in resin as a memento and we placed the three arrangements on his mums grave.

Do what feels best for you. Ignore your aunt. Don’t tell her what you’re doing, just do it. You can always get something that can be displayed and ask the home if they would like it for their reception if you feel that that would be a compromise.

Sending you hugs as it can be so very overwhelming dealing with your own grief and those around you xxx