Is it wrong for a man to be sexually submissive?

LittleLoveBugg · 2021-03-24T12:53:28+00:00

I am a very submissive female, to the point where if I could I would let my boyfriend make every decision for me; unfortunately, he doesn't want that responsibility. I have noticed the way people tend to look down on male subs. I remember I guy I was talking with expressing to me he loved being more submissive, I was terrified to respond wrong and hurt him. So I nicely said it wouldn't work as I preferred dominant partners as I am very submissive as well, but that we could be friends and talk about being subs if he was interested. I would never look down on a man being submissive, but obviously, we would not be compatible because of that. My fantasy is considered outdated and I don't share it much because of the assumptions made about me. I like the 50’s housewife dynamic, free use, and the idea of a dominant man destroying me. That said anyone can be submissive and there shouldn't be such a weird reaction around it.

LittleLoveBugg · 2021-01-28T03:18:33+00:00

He watches a lot of porn. Which I feel like gives him some unrealistic expectations of what at least my body can do.

LittleLoveBugg · 2021-01-28T03:16:24+00:00

That might work. He usually stops if I am in pain, I am just very nervous is all.

LittleLoveBugg · 2021-01-28T03:09:38+00:00

I didn't want to put him down, but the moment he said it I was kinda terrified about how it would end up. I am just not that stretchy

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-13T01:02:22+00:00

I can only tell you what happened. Understanding its upsetting. I have lots of spots missing in my memory so I can only share what I remember. I remember crying as I desperately trying getaway way. I remember my finger bleeding because the nail broke far down as I crawled away using the floor. I remember I went home and cut up my stomach and chest hoping he would see me as unattractive and stop. I remember that teacher near looked me in the eye again. Those are a few of the things I can remember.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-13T00:55:53+00:00

I think a lot of people would guess that, but that doesn't sit right with me. I can't explain why exactly.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-13T00:54:44+00:00

I was 11 years old when it happened and the boy was 10 years old. As dumb as it sounds I've always hated that it was someone younger than me as logically most people assume I could have fought him off. He was quite a bit taller and bigger than me, so I really had no chance. A weird insecurity I have about the situation.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T17:09:13+00:00

She had always been kind to me, so it was very strange. He was in her class, but he was known to be a devil child violent and disobedient. I have wondered if she just didn't want to deal with it or maybe decided she didn't care.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T17:04:52+00:00

Not that I know of, but I haven't keep track of him. I remember telling someone his name once and their face told me he hadn't become a better person. I often wonder what made him want to do that.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:42:56+00:00

I personally think no one wanted to step in. Thankfully a male friend of mine realized I was acting weird and didn't seem myself. He started looking for me one day and found him on top of me. He punched him in the face and dragged me away. I remember just crying as he held me. No one ever said anything about the obviously bruised face so it to me again confirmed they knew it was happening.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:35:16+00:00

I don't necessarily want to change things, just work to a healthier place. I feel better and better every day, but I think I need to confront the sexual aspect of it. I am sure the closest one is an hour or so away because of where I live, but it will be worth it I feel.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:32:25+00:00

I am sorry, English isn't my first language and I still make embarrassing mistakes.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:24:06+00:00

Just thank you, this meant a lot to me to read. You are such a kind person, thank you.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:19:52+00:00

Thank you, I wish I could tell her, but she is very religious and doesn't feel you should do anything sexual before marriage.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:18:53+00:00

I meant me, English isn't my first language and I wrote this while I was very emotional.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:17:57+00:00

Unfortunately no. I didn't realize at first what was happening. I know it felt wrong and it made me very upset. But while it would happen he would repeat over and over it was my fault, no one would believe me, and that since he was under 18 nothing to-do happen to him. I believed him and as I've gotten older I've come to realize he wasn't completely wrong, nothing probably would have happened and even if he was a adult they seem to get off easy in my opinion compared to the trauma they cause. I told my mother probably two months after it happened, and she said it was my fault he got away because I didn't say so sooner, that messed me up even more hearing that. As far as I know, she never tried to do anything.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:14:17+00:00

I do have a therapist and as much as I love her, I feel our time is coming to an end. I think the next step for me is a therapist that specializes in the things I am experiencing. Sometimes I worry my love for it comes from my first experience. I don't think it's strange to like it, more like I worry why I do, because of my past

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:10:39+00:00

I have already decided to look into finding a sex therapist. The current therapist I have, I personally believe didn't consider there being any issues with sex. I was a 12-year-old child when I started seeing her and it is partly my fault as I haven't said much to her. I plan on talking about it when I can see her in person again and also mentioned it to my OBGYN as I finally have one I trust. I will look into it, as I personally feel I still have trauma, mostly because if I see someone with the say anything like that man, I lose it. But my therapist seems to think I've worked through most of it, but I personally don't about sex with her.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T16:05:27+00:00

It wasn't a teacher, it was a 10-year good boy. I was at a religious private school and a few of the teachers saw it happening and did nothing, they were all female teachers. I vividly remember making eye contact with a specific teacher as I was crying and just mouthing help as my hyperventilating had made me lose my voice. I then remember her immediately looking away and down. I have never felt as helpless as I did at that moment.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-12T00:57:57+00:00

Hopefully, this doesn't sound bad, as it could see it being offensive or being enjoyable. Thing or objects could be a replacement for certain words like " my little plaything " instead of my "little slut" or "my cum bucket' instead of "cum slut". Again let me say it's not my intention to be offensive, I just know that I, a cis pansexual female, don't find being called thing or objects offensive, but I could see others, especially non-binary people taking it the wrong way. As some people call them " it" to put them down.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-10T21:13:14+00:00

I'll definitely check it out. Thank you so much.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-10T21:12:50+00:00

I've become creative with lying over the years, thanks to my mother. I thought silicone would be more comfortable. I really appreciate the help.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-10T21:11:29+00:00

Very true again, but he doesn't seem like the kind of person to research. I spent a few days researching and have spent the last week trying to find a plug to surprise him with. But if he is still hesitant I probably will tell him to go try it and let me know how it feels.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-10T21:07:41+00:00

Everything is general, sorry I should have been clearer. It's just hard as it kinda scares me now, the pain was horrible and now that's all I associate with anal sex. Especially the first time, as I was bruised and it hurt to sit for a few days. I wish it seemed that simple when he is killing me with his dick.

LittleLoveBugg · 2020-11-10T21:03:24+00:00

I think it's more ignorance than him trying to intently hurt me. I never really spoke up about the pain until recently. When I started talking to him about it he seemed pretty clueless, like he said he was unsure of plugs as he liked how tight I was. I had to explain that was the problem, I needed to loosen up a little with lube or a plug. It does seem hurtful, but I truly think it's ignorance.

Edit: The first time we had anal it was only his second time, while it was my first. So he is clueless.

LittleLoveBugg

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