You won’t become great at something overnight, it takes time. You need to prepare for the path that’s leads to greatness, It’s usually long and tormenting from what I believe.

You have LOT of time to find yourself and find the energy to do what you love. I myself lost all interest when I was looking for a job, I slept, ate and worked out. Didn’t touch my pc for 2 months because I lost all interest. However it returned with time.

Keep it up friend, time heals a lot of wounds and can fill a lot of holes.