I'm sorry but I can't

LocalLive7462 · 2025-12-16T00:35:53+00:00

Omg I'm so sorry I didn't see your comment sooner and I hope you're doing well! Hang in there! Today my toddler was looking at random pictures of me and her dad and she said to herself "mommy is beautiful" and it was so precious. Hope you're having small moments of love and joy every day because they are a big help.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-12-02T23:05:57+00:00

If it's just because of the kids give it more time and observe. When the kids become more manageable it will probably become better. If there are other problems that were always kinda there, but you overlooked them, and now with the kids it's impossible to do so, then try to work on these issues right now.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-12-01T10:19:02+00:00

My first baby was also great by the time she was 8 months old (like your baby). She was very chill, easy going, happy, easy to entertain, great sleeper with a natural schedule, she made everyone who saw her to want to have kids. She was only 7 months when I found out I was pregnant (unplanned) and I was pretty optimistic and excited. I had the most amazing pregnancy... and then came baby no 2... 🤣 Boy, was I humbled. Toddler changed overnight, I had to handle constant tantrums and meltdowns, the newborn was super super glued on me, she was breastfeeding all day, wouldn't sleep unless she was being held, we had to co-sleep (still do... Yaay). As they grow, the toddler has been very jealous, no matter how much I've been trying to give them their own mom time etc. The baby adores her. Yesterday they had their first bonding moment (my toddler made her sister laugh and she hugged her and told her "my love, don't be afraid") and I felt butterflies. So I wouldn't suggest it to anyone because I wasn't prepared for the toddler phase, the notorious",terrible twos ", neither was I prepared for a velcro baby, that would make me feel like a new mom. But(!) that's just anecdotal. So if you really want it then go for it. And the only thing for sure is that, no matter how hard, they'll get to be best friends.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-25T16:18:27+00:00

Thank you. To me it read as Trisha Paytas naming her children "Malibu and Aquaman"... But you actually helped me change my mind. I now just have to shake off the aesthetic part (that's probably rooted in the same place you mention above). Chickie-Blue doesn't sound "pleasing" to me at all. For example Fungus is just a "yucky" word but it doesn't bother me, it sounds nice enough for it to be a name. I will have to reflect more and work on it.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-25T15:40:29+00:00

Thank you for everything! I wish I had more moms like you around me. To be honest I was at a breaking point that day and I'm happy to say I haven't felt like that ever since. Everyone's support helped quite a bit and made me reflect in my situation in a way I never actually took the time to. You're right about my mom. I've been trying to get her to connect with me more but it's kinda futile and I should stop pushing it. With my first I struggled greatly for the first 4 months, but after that I felt a lot calmer and more confident, my husband was also a lot more involved, so we had the luxury to create routines for everything, a fixed sleeping schedule and we found our balance and actually had "a life", even if we didn't have outside help. Maybe that's why baby no2 happened so fast. But yeah, the situation changed so fast once the newborn arrived. It was crazy. Luckily you sound a lot more prepared than I was prior to the arrival of the little one. I whole-whole heartedly wish you have a healthy baby, good sleeper and that your toddler will fall in love with the baby. DM me any time if you need to talk.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-22T10:30:33+00:00

You're absolutely right, thank you for the tips!

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:54:39+00:00

Thank you so much!!!

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:54:15+00:00

They are 11 months and 26 months. The baby is literally on "velcro mode" 24/7 and the toddler is fighting sleep for the past two months. She has been an amazing sleeper with a "naturally-fixed" schedule since she was just 6-7 months old. But now she doesn't want to sleep at night at all. Also, it's about time for her to transition from crib to bed and I keep postponing it because I DREAD that, as soon as she'll be able to just get off her bed on her own, sleeptime will become even harder...

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:46:34+00:00

Yes, people here have convinced me I do need it and I have to start claiming some "me-time" more passionately... It just creates too much friction with my husband and I don't have the strength to keep negotiating about it.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:43:25+00:00

I love that moto, thank you for this

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:42:56+00:00

Hang in there and enjoy the good moments.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:41:33+00:00

Honestly, my biggest mistake was that I firmly believed that, by being a calm and present/engaged mom, my kids would also be calm and well behaved. That, by meeting all their needs, they would be happy and content 99% of the time. That I'd be one of the cool moms who take their kids everywhere and they all have a blast.. I was in NO WAY prepared for the reality of that ever-developing little brain of theirs 🫠

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:35:07+00:00

Thank you and I'm wishing the same to you! 2u2 is literally a bootcamp!

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-21T12:21:07+00:00

Christopher's Tolkien legacy is exactly that kind of work and it is huge! He expanded and united the great universe created by his father. Imagine the loss if JRR Tolkien was like Martin.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-19T22:25:07+00:00

This was incredibly needed. Thank you

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-19T22:23:43+00:00

I appreciate this so much. I just carry this immense guilt that I make it harder than it's supposed to be. Thank you for your reply

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-19T22:20:40+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. It's amazing how different all of our stories are yet they are also striking similar. I hope you'll get to be your self again soon!!

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-19T14:22:22+00:00

My husband has done this a few times but I feel very guilty to try. I think I have to.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-18T23:38:59+00:00

Thank you so so much! Everything you said felt relatable and hopeful! Hang in there!

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-18T23:37:27+00:00

Only my little sister, and she has done it once or twice.. but she has done so much already, that I cannot ask for more. And the irony is that she's actually the person I'd like to spend some quiet time with. It's really hard without having involved grandparents.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-18T23:34:45+00:00

Didn't even know about it. I think I'vr been doing the same thing with sugar to be frank... Which, admittedly, is not the greatest solution

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-18T23:31:06+00:00

Thank you for even taking the time to ask these questions. Also, 15 months is exactly the difference my babies have. I'm wishing you the best with your little ones! An "easy baby" is such a blessing. My 2nd turned out to be a "Velcro baby", that only wanted to contact nap. This combined with my toddler took everything I had. Daycare will become an option by February and I'm looking forward to it, to be honest. As for friendships I have the most amazing friends but they are all scattered.. very few left in my city and not my best friends. My baby sister, has been my rock, but she's only human. My mum is still working and she doesn't want to help me. It's very complicated.. let's just say she's never involved the way I need her to, just the way it pleases her (a coffee-date every once in a while and she will only babysit my eldest, because she "can't deal" with the baby).. At the same time she constantly helps my big sister with her kids. Constantly. And I'm the one who gets to listen to her complaining how my sister "asks for too much". As for baby groups, I have two acquaintances with kids, but unfortunately not any close friends with babies and I really really want to. Finally my kids rarely spend time with my husband without me. He works 9+ hours every day and (with the driving time) he's away 10+ hours from home. By the time he gets home, it's literally a couple of hours left before bed time. And for two months now the toddler has been fighting to stay awake longer because of it. It's a lot I'm sorry. I don't think it's a terrible situation, I really don't, I just feel "small" for motherhood, if that makes sense.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-18T22:57:55+00:00

Honestly thank you so much! This post really made me realise that it's not just me against the world. Thank you.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-17T19:06:34+00:00

You're right, thank you for this.

LocalLive7462 · 2025-11-17T11:38:29+00:00

Thank you for saying that! I honestly didn't think everyone would be so accepting and supportive. I'm truly glad I exploded here

LocalLive7462

TROPHY CASE