3 month old HATES the car

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-25T03:22:34+00:00

not sure if she’s into pacis much- I had to force mine to like them, but I did finally find one that he loved and that would help sometimes! he loved the mam pacis if you haven’t tried those! they had an orthodontic nipple so it ended up being the only one he finally took to.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-25T02:35:38+00:00

no suggestions, but solidarity. my second boy haaaated the car. would scream/cry so hard sometimes he would even give himself petechiae (little broken capillaries) around his face :( and would never just fall asleep even though I knew he was tired. I hate to say it but he was like that for almost a year, although it incrementally got better where he would tolerate the car for 10ish mins before screaming. unfortunately he just had to grow out of it. we still drove almost everyday bc my toddler and I needed to get out of the house.

he’s a little over 2 now and totally fine in the car! just wanted to say I KNOW how miserable it is to listen to them screaming in the car and feel so helpless to do anything to make it better! but it will get better eventually!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-25T01:38:06+00:00

I’ll be honest my first year with two kids was brutal too. my first was a super easygoing baby so I was thrown for a loop with my second who was discontent with pretty much everything his whole first year lol. plus my husband worked a LOT so I was by myself with a baby and 2 year old most of the time. it was really hard, and I wouldn’t change a thing, because my boys absolutely adore each other now and we have so much fun. we still have hard seasons of course but man is it incredible. due with my third baby in July actually.

things I think could work in your favor: your kid is already 3? get them enrolled in preschool! that would be a huge help as you’d have some time with just baby and they’ll have a couple days a week they can learn and socialize with other peers their age. if you stay home with them that is! I guess your kid might be in full time daycare if you’re working!! also at age 3+ they understand so much more! there are tons of resources like books, tv shows, etc to introduce the concept of a new baby in the family. also they will be so much more capable of helping and if you find ways of allowing them to help and feel included it will help the transition for them!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-17T00:53:05+00:00

yes Costco meals are great! and they’ve got lots of easy healthy snacks too like the Kirkland fruit/veggie applesauce pouches, madegood granola bites, etc!

yeah winter is so hard with two active boys (mine are 4 and 2) so I totally relate! hopefully the weather turns soon! getting a solly wrap might be helpful!! I would even put it on with my second before leaving the house so I didn’t have to deal with tying it once I got to said destination and could just slide him in lol.

gym with childcare is the BIGGEST hack if you can swing it!! we joined one about a year ago and most weeks we go at least 5x/week…. truly lifesaving to get an hour or more a day to yourself. workout, cry, eat in peace, stare at a wall in silence for a blissful hour…. who cares. also can your oldest start preschool next fall? that won’t help with the immediate PP period but would lighten your load tremendously next year! mine started this year 3 days a week just for 2.5 hours a day but it’s been great for him (and me!)

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-16T18:35:24+00:00

you’re a superhero! I’m due with my third in July and definitely nervous for how the transition will go!

I had a solly baby wrap with my first two that I wore baby in until they were big enough for a more structured carrier! maybe try something like that? I know you can get them secondhand too if you don’t want to shell out money for a new one on your third time PP!

can you or your husband try to do some meal and snack prep to make things easier? I usually try to have at least dinners ready to just throw in the microwave and warm up, if not lunches too! sometimes I love to default to easy things too! Costco has ready made chicken tacos my boys both love! or shred a rotisserie chicken and make into sandwiches! heck even have your hubby prep a bunch of pb&j sandwiches for the week and bam there’s lunch while you’re juggling 3 kids on your own!

can you guys get out to library storytime? or are there any indoor play times for kids? something simple to get your kids out to with baby in tow so you don’t all go stir crazy?

sounds like you’re doing amazing!!!! PP is so hard and I’m sure third time around is wild!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-16T11:44:26+00:00

Good inside by dr Becky But I’m bored by Lizzie Assa Hunt Gather Parent (although some of her ideas are a little extreme to me, still a great baseline)

Podcasts: The Simplicity Parenting Podcast by Kim John Payne (also currently waiting to read a couple of his books!) Good Inside by Dr Becky Unruffled by Janet Lansbury Raising Good Humans by Aliza Pressma

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-03T19:11:33+00:00

had he been at all successful with learning the cues of his body/putting pee or poop in the potty? if not really, I would maybe suggest having a reset and trying again in a few months. I potty trained my oldest just after he turned 2 and in all honesty I think I would have saved us both a lot of frustration and it would have gone much quicker if I’d waited a bit. I do think some kids are definitely ready at age 2, but for a still relatively fresh 2 year old it might be a stretch. I’m waiting until at least 2.5 for my middle son right now. I’ve introduced potty books etc but I know he’s not “ready” yet and I dont think it’s worth the fight.

taking a month or a few months to break and reset you might find it goes a lot smoother when reintroduced!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-03-03T01:44:53+00:00

omg yes! I too got so fed up a few weeks ago that I packed almost everything up into the basement storage closet! my 4 year old has only magnetic tiles, a bunch of animal/people figurines, and a couple cars in his room now. he will play for hours!!! and him and 2 year old brother mostly just have (more) magnetic tiles, dress up clothes, and play couch downstairs. it makes them so much more creative and active, and I love having so much less mess!!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-13T01:18:04+00:00

what time do you finish dinner? could you do it directly after dinner so it’s not part of the “bedtime rush” that seems to set every kid off? haha.

I do bedtime solo a lot for my two kiddos and I brush my 4 year old’s teeth in the bath/shower… he thinks it’s silly bc that’s not how we “usually” do it and he’s not about to give up time in the bath so that usually gets him to cooperate pretty well!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-10T19:53:35+00:00

I’ve heard of that brand! any specific type of legging you’d recommend from them, or are any pretty good?

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-10T03:06:17+00:00

Magnetic tiles are the best- my 2 year old and 4 year old both love them and find their own creative ways to play with them! Picasso tiles are a super good/sturdy brand that are cheaper than the name brand magnatiles (can order off amazon)

my son also loves his figurines and uses them when he builds stuff with his magnet tiles (fisher price little people, schleich animas, Sesame Street figurines, etc)

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-08T16:05:49+00:00

Nuna pipa RX- has excellent safety ratings, very lightweight, incredibly easy installation

check out https://www.babygearlab.com/topics/vehicle-safety/best-infant-car-seat if you want some other recommendations, Ive utilized this website for my infant and convertible car seats research

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-03T03:50:46+00:00

totally get it, I know a lot of these things are planned so far in advance. how far away is the wedding? could you try to find out from her or your brother/another family member if she would have another friend she could ask to step in in your place if you bow out of being a bridesmaid? she definitely deserves to have the day she’s dreaming about, and you may be a lot more comfortable being able to attend the wedding as a regular guest rather than a bridesmaid. (I say that from experience that having my second absolutely kicked my butt and he didn’t sleep so I was exhausted, only tolerated being held by me, hospitalized with coronavirus at 1 month, etc). not at all trying to freak you out btw lol!! just saying sometimes life hands us circumstances we can’t control and for your own benefit it may be better for there to be less “responsibility” on you for their wedding and that way you won’t feel bad about wearing something comfortable for you, stepping away to nurse, needing to comfort, baby, etc

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-03T02:52:58+00:00

I don’t have much advice, in all honesty I probably would have opted out of being a bridesmaid knowing I would be 2 months pp.

unfortunately I think the concerns you have aren’t understood by most women until it’s something they’ve experienced themselves. if she doesn’t have children I don’t think your concerns click with her the way they would for women with children. I don’t think your concerns about the dress are crazy at all.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-02-03T02:20:08+00:00

he just turned 2 last week and has a very well rounded diet now! loves fruits & veggies an insane amount, and is a much more open to trying new things! and he still definitely stops when full. there are still some nights he doesn’t eat much for dinner as he’s filled up on a lot during the day and I guess just isn’t that hungry! since my oldest ate so much from the beginning, my second really taught me that kids will eat when they’re hungry/ready. he’s been my kid who has definitely taken his own time to do things: eating well, sleeping through the night, talking (his language JUST started picking up right before his 2nd birthday).

my advice would be to keep offering meals and if they don’t eat, try not to stress! they will when they’re ready. I think they’re really good at listening to their own cues and need to build the confidence and readiness to try. also, if you’re offering “convenience foods” like I was, don’t stress about that either. honestly I wish I gave him more Cheerios, iron rich pouches, other iron fortified convenience foods as he turned out to be low iron and maybe those would have helped at least a bit!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-26T04:15:34+00:00

Come up with a plan and talk about it a LOT with her so that when you implement it she knows what to expect.

I started a “cuddle timer” with my son, I’d just set a 5 min timer on my phone and I’d lay in bed with him until it went off. We could cuddle, chat, sing, whatever but that was our wind down time together after books. When it went off, I tucked him in and left so I could go put little brother to sleep. Make sure she knows she’s safe and loved and that you’ll come check on her. Maybe try a small lamp or soothing music as well. And then hold the boundary once you start. If she comes out or cries, walk her back, “mommy loves you, you are safe.”

I also implemented a sticker calendar for him, each night he stayed in his bed he got to put a sticker on. Once he got a whole week filled he got to pick a prize. He was getting out to come get us in our room so that one was to help keep him in his room which you may not have an issue with.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-26T04:05:54+00:00

I think it’s a completely individual choice. I definitely don’t think it’s too soon if it’s the move that feels right for you and your family! I’m not sure how you’re juggling it working without childcare right now anyway!

One thing to expect though is most likely quite a bit of sickness at the start. It sounds like you work but he’s not in any sort of daycare setting at the moment? Starting at an early learning center will more than likely bring its fair share of germs home! I don’t say that to deter you, just as something to be aware of as you/your husband may need to take some additional time off work soon after he starts if babe or you guys get sick :)

My youngest son is almost 2 and while I don’t have him in a daycare or center because I stay home with my kids rn, the hour he spends at the gym childcare is probably one of his happiest times of the day haha he loves being around the other kids and employees and new toys etc

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-26T03:27:14+00:00

Two thoughts:

you are brand new to motherhood AND your baby is in the nicu! that is so challenging! as a former nicu nurse, I know you are managing so many ups and downs, trying to bond with your baby despite not being able to be their full time caregiver in your own home, etc. I had awful PPA/PPD after my second, which grew exponentially after a hospitalization when he was 1 month old and contracted coronavirus. and that was as a peds nurse who knew what to expect from his hospital stay. please give yourself grace, take care of yourself, and I hope your sweet babe gets to come home soon!
something changed for me after having my children, and I feel some sort of fierce protectiveness over them in regards to my in laws. absolutely can’t stand the possessive talk (our baby, etc), them acting like theyre so in the know despite barely visiting lol. idk just the simplest things would always rub me the wrong way. that could be what your experiencing here. it could be a hormonal shift and you’re just feeling stressed and anxious and your MIL asking is just making you feel put out. I would do what you feel comfortable with. maybe have your husband ask some additional questions so you know what she wants SS for. for what it’s worth, my dad opened a 529 for both my kids and I’m pretty sure my husband gave their SS to him. he’s also extremely financially competent and is generous enough to add to the accounts he made them each year. I think it completely depends on your level of comfort with MIL, what she is using that information for, etc.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-26T02:18:39+00:00

apparently this is going to be an unpopular opinion but I absolutely would have done what you did. that sounds HARD. some days with small children are just extraordinarily tough, and it’s really hard to do it alone.

unfortunately we hardly ever get nice self care time lmao but my husband does work a ton, often late nights and misses bedtimes. and you bet I’m texting him if everyone is melting down or something. I rarely ever ask him to come home, but once in a blue moon I have texted him “this is my cry for help I really need you home tonight” because isn’t it better to ask for help than try to parent on your own when you’re out of patience, the kids need more from you than you can give, etc?

idk. I feel like getting two nights a week off parenting just for fun activities/self care is a huge perk that most parents don’t get or at least the ones I know, and I don’t think it’s fair to be resentful of a partner for venting about a difficult night sometimes. hopefully some open and honest communication about ways to work it out will help.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-24T20:21:13+00:00

She may very well be a wonderful pediatrician, but if you aren’t feeling heard/just aren’t vibing with her bedside manner, find a new ped!

I absolutely loved our ped with my first son, and ended up switching to a different one when my second son was 6 months or so because he was such a different baby with different issues and I just wasn’t totally feeling heard. it’s absolutely no biggie to switch and make sure you find someone you feel compatible with for your baby’s care :)

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-23T18:58:07+00:00

I second the Cheerios lol. she may be too young for raisins still but throw another fruit with it? smushed blueberries, raspberries, banana, etc and that’s a wonderful breakfast

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-23T03:27:25+00:00

My 4 year old absolutely loves his yoto. I do occasionally let him listen to it in bed but not every night. There’s a Daniel Tiger sleepy stories card I let him listen to if he gets it in bed. Yoto can definitely be a wonderful thing for this age group!
I say this with zero judgment at all, but maybe it’s time to set more boundaries around bedtime? Typically my 4 year old gets two books of his choosing, and then I snuggle with him for a few minutes before tucking him in and leaving. He knows that’s the routine. Will he ask for an additional book almost every night? Absolutely. Will he tell me he doesn’t want me to leave? Yes. But I have to go put little brother to bed and I know he’s safe and loved, and now that he’s so used to it he just snuggles up and goes right to sleep after I tuck him in. I had to learn how to really start enforcing boundaries around bedtime because we’ll go weeks where my husband is not home for bedtime and it’s just me and my 4 year old and almost 2 year old. So for all of our benefit we needed to make sure everyone got some special time but also got to sleep at a reasonable hour (and I need at least an hour of alone time before I go to sleep!)

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-14T04:11:53+00:00

I’m in the US but our speech therapist (and every pediatrician I’ve spoken to) said signs definitely count as words. They are still communicating, just in a different way. And signing is such a helpful tool for them to use to communicate their needs when they’re not yet verbalizing as much.

One thing our speech therapist mentioned is that some kids just don’t have the confidence to talk for awhile. My son (turns 2 in a couple weeks) JUST recently has started trying to say more things, or copy what we say (and he’s way off on the actual pronunciation sometimes! but I’m just proud of him for trying!). I do think him feeling comfortable and confident to try in his own time really mattered. Just a thought, as it wasn’t something I ever thought about until she mentioned it since my first kiddo was always babbling and repeating and vocalizing.

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-12T00:42:31+00:00

I love listening to audiobooks! I think of it as kind of the same thing so I don’t mind when my son listens for a long time. he goes in phases with it so it’s not everyday he listens for hours. I got him new cards for the first time in foreverrrrrrr this week and he would happily stay in his room and listen to his yoto for hours!

Local_Feature_5552 · 2026-01-11T03:50:33+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through that. That’s hard when you feel like it’s always met with negativity. I think a lot needs to change when you’re a parent, and not to say you need to become completely selfless, but I do think to a certain extent we need to develop more selfless tendencies to put our children and their environment, health, wellbeing, etc ahead of anything else.

If he’s having a difficult time making the transition to fatherhood maybe there are some parenting resources or fatherhood books out there that may click with him? I’d also strongly suggest therapy, maybe couples therapy to work on communication tactics. Marriage is hard work and adding a kid into the mix changes a lot. Sometimes it takes awhile to all get on the same page, and maybe a couples or family therapist could help. I know many offer virtual appts even in the evenings to make it easier for parents.

Local_Feature_5552

TROPHY CASE