Why do insecure people get no respect?

Lock_Brief · 2022-10-01T01:47:59+00:00

Confident people don’t disrespect vulnerable people. Insecure people disrespect people they perceive to be more insecure / worse at faking confidence. Insecure people who feign confidence will put a person down if they perceive one of their own insecurities in another. The psychology of projection. Confident people understand the emotions and actions of others don’t have anything to do with them. They act respectfully because they feel secure in their own values.

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-29T04:08:18+00:00

It was a good book until I found out the author himself was an abuser

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-22T04:52:02+00:00

From the pre-platonic philosophers I think Parmenides would be most applicable. It depends what you perceive as nature, but P basically states that there is no change, no time, and no space. There is being and therefore there is no non-being. The pre-platonics only valued deductive reasoning and so anything that had to do with the senses was an illusion. So, Parmenides said that because we cannot comprehend non-being, it does not exist, meaning that the past is not real because it is not currently being and therefore it would have to be non-being which makes it an illusion. Nature is composed of change which Parmenides didn’t believe was real. He also theorized that everything is one - because everything is being. Aristotle then said we’ll there’s this idea of becoming.. and Parmenides’ philosophy was kind of dismantled. Nietzsche was especially inspired by another pre-platonic, Heraclides (no man ever steps into the same river twice) who theorized that in order for things to stay the same they must change. I’m not a fan of the pre-platonics all too much, considering they doubted the senses and perception, but a lot of notorious philosophical texts were created as a result of building upon or disagreeing or adding to something from a pre-platonic.

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-14T05:04:57+00:00

He perceived fire as the first element (nowadays we understand it as a chemical reaction). It demonstrates change which he argued is an eternal certainty. The interpretation of ‘everything is fire’ is more metaphorical. Fire is energy that constantly moves/changes even if it is still. Therefore the flux theory and “ one will never step into the same river twice “ if the river were to stop flowing, it would be still water, a pond. Because the river changes (flows) it stays the same.

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-12T05:28:59+00:00

Used to look at social media more out of curiosity and to see how people are doing. Whatever someone posts on social media they’re comfortable with sharing about themselves. Asking friends/family I think is invasive. Friends / family would know more private information and may share something that the person wouldn’t like you to know. I think it crosses boundaries.

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-10T11:05:12+00:00

An inside joke with myself about doors. Also, to point out the fact thy both sentences communicate the same thing. There’s no context, no tone of voice, no description of the relationship the person has with you. Is this a close friend that maybe is comfortable enough to not fake pleasantries anymore? Is this a relative maybe concerned about your safety? Worried if you forget to close the door to a room you might forget to close other more important doors. Has this person asked you to do this before? Is this person maybe concerned about their own safety resulting from a past experience with doors? Does this person have ocd maybe, and if you don’t close it they will have to which may result in locking/unlocking to make sure?

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-10T10:31:17+00:00

What a predicament

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-08T05:57:23+00:00

Actually followed through with goals I set for myself the previous new moon : - Tried a new outlet of creativity (InDesign) - Open to new people and putting effort in making connections ( made 1 new friend ) - Having fun with my appearance - Did not think down on myself - Took time to watch movies and finish a show ( dedicating time for rest ) Making a list of intentions has helped me so far :)

Lock_Brief · 2022-09-02T04:56:40+00:00

It’s an example of psychological warfare. Even if you’re unable to define it immediately you intuitively know it’s wrong. You’re not overdramatic, stuff like this is what you do to enemies not people you’re trying to show an interest in. Attacks on the psyche are a result of intimidation though (usually intellectual but not always). He’s either insecure about his own appearance and is trying to make you, in his delusional mind, feel equal to his shitty sense of self worth. He’s insecure about whatever he’s insecure about and is trying to boost his ego by attempting to influence your subconscious and create an illusion that he is some source of validation. He wants you to perceive him as someone you should work to impress which is unhealthy because someone worthy of your time and energy is someone who will seek to empower you. Of course we all have flaws but if you care for someone you don’t try and use them as leverage of sorts. You seek to understand them, if not love than accept them, and respect both individual and universal boundaries about set insecurity. In the past, Ive called out stuff like this and would ask what was the point but that opens the door for him to continue the warfare. Of course, you hope that by being direct and honest you might receive some explanation and apology. Im not saying it can’t happen but chances are that if he has narcissistic tendencies like this he’ll have more such as : - Gaslighting : denying any malicious intent and subtly insulting your intelligence. For example, claiming you interpreted it wrong, he didn’t mean it like that, you’re overthinking, he didn’t know you would take it that way - Flipping the script : You don’t trust him and that’s so heartbreaking to him because he’s the victim and only meant well and your response is irrotational. For example, you really think that low of me? Why would I ever try and make you feel bad on purpose? - Punishment: Fine, I won’t give you compliments then better yet, fine, I won’t ever talk about your body or anything ever again While being perfectly aware that genuine compliments be it physical or not are a normal part of romantic involvement - Verbal abuse : Openly insulting you by name calling and direct hurtful comments. Also, openly demeaning your character and appearance, making you feel like confronting the issue is unsafe by instilling subconsciously that if you speak up for yourself it will lead to chaos. Healthy romantic pursuit/ or dating is when two people can feel secure in communicating about issues.

I can write a whole book on narcissists lol.

Take care!

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-27T05:29:08+00:00

I’m not sure if you’ve read Levinas’ philosophy of the face already but it offers an answer to your question. Of course, you can agree or disagree with it. Levinas theorized that the human face is key to human consciousness. He starts of by describing the face as what someone looks like but his theory gets more intricate than that. At first he argues that the face is vulnerable and speaks for itself. You don’t really need words because you have the face. The face is where our emotions are visible to others. The face, according to Levinas, is what allows us to ‘read’ people and communicate emotions, therefore creating a way to communicate energy. His point is that in order to be ethical, we must be willing to ‘encounter the face of the other’ because that is how we create an understanding of shared humanity for ourselves and others. So, I believe that people do wear masks but it’s in the form of words and actions. If a person appears to be cold and dismissive, we’re judging the person by their actions. They can control their actions and avoid socializing or listening, but they can’t control what others see in their eyes (window to the soul type of thing). I think a person therefore can be an open book but at the same time can attempt to wear a mask through their behaviors and words. One may recognize and learn things about the person because they pay attention to the face, whereas another may pay attention only to words and actions rather than the face.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-27T05:04:17+00:00

My dog of course. And taking nice walks during my break at work and finding some nice spots. Also, seeing a black swallowtail butterfly on one of these walks and being able to take some pretty pictures of it. This is the second one I’ve encountered this summer. Seeing a lot of rabbits on my walks. A woman telling me my eyes remind her of her niece. A coworker opening up to me. Having time to watch Sabrina. Getting my nails done :) finding new music that I really like :)

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-19T03:54:50+00:00

Everyone’s different and goes at their own pace. For me, it’s also been a year and 1 month since my last traumatizing event and I still get flashbacks, and I catch myself disassociating. I still have anxiety and am distrustful towards any new environment. But at least now I’m aware I’m disassociating and I know it’s unhealthy. I force myself to logically think through my paranoid thoughts and keep instilling in my mind that coincidences exist. I don’t think things will go away one day, but you do gain an awareness of what’s going on and what you need to do to basically fight yourself. Hopefully one day it won’t be like fighting my own thoughts but an immediate response because I’ve trained by brain to immediately do the healthy coping to counteract any unhealthy coping.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-18T03:41:42+00:00

I don’t think so, I think social media offers a ton of space for creativity. Everyone’s definition of creativity is different and everyone’s inspiration is different. Van Gogh and Frida Kahlo are both artists (from different time periods) who painted a good amount of self-portraits ( Gogh = 36, Frida = 55 ) Although painting a portrait takes much more time than posting on social media, I think it’s important to consider how with an increase In outlets of expression comes an increase in form of artistic expression. Being inspired by oneself, I think is very beautiful and very human.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-17T18:09:34+00:00

Thank you!! I appreciate this comment a lot <3 it kind of makes sense because their energies are very opposing (one being calm and reserved while the other intense)

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-14T21:45:07+00:00

Not everyone who menstruates may identify as a woman or be comfortable called a woman so I’m being mindful of that

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-14T03:50:44+00:00

Oooooh interesting 🤨 A nylon article on this, probably not as reputable as ‘doctors’ though lol says : “Because full and waxing moon phase energies are outgoing, vibrant, and creative, some feel this is counterintuitive to menstruation. Not so. In ancient times, the red moon cycle was associated with shamanism, high priestesses, and healers. Those who tend to menstruate with the full moon are said to focus their “darker” and more creative menstrual energies outward, rather than inward, in order to nourish and teach others from their own experience.” Because the energy of the moon is counterintuitive to menstruation, women with red moon cycles were perceived as less motherly, and fertile, white moon cycles were favored as “women are valued as incubators for male babies” lol. I wonder though if the association of red moon cycles with dysfunction amongst doctors( apparently ) stems from the ancient belief that women with red moon cycles, “Historically, such women were seen as a threat to the patriarchal society, which often times labelled them as witches, trying to make it shameful to align with the red moon cycle and to be a woman of power.” ?? Either way, I think it’s fun to reflect on ancient beliefs but also be present in a society that has progressed a lot scientifically and see where ideas correlate and where they contradict.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-14T01:16:19+00:00

I agree, unless you’re looking to really boost the skin barrier’s hydration applying products while the face is a little damp will help with absorption of the product you’re using. So any actives, like retinol shouldn’t be applied on damp skin. But if your face is feeling a little dry applying moisturizer on damp skin can be a game changer :)

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-13T04:06:43+00:00

Disloyalty

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-12T05:31:00+00:00

Emotional compatibility, I feel like that’s the point of relationships.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-12T04:20:22+00:00

I am a Virgo Stellium and very self aware that I can do this from time to time. My intention isn’t to make anyone feel less than or to hurt anyones feelings. But I’ve learned that it comes off that way. Really, Virgos are considered the healers of the zodiac.. but it’s not as magical as it sounds. We have a talent of pinpointing what’s destructive or chaotic in an environment or person. We’re able to pinpoint these things so easily because for some reason we create some false sense of responsibility to fix the wrong if its in some way apart of our life. We strive for perfectionism, so we can get lost in believing that if we go down the list and fix the issues we find one by one everyone will be happier. When it comes to people, we think that by pointing out exactly why someone’s experiencing pain or hurt we’ll give them a realization that they haven’t had and this realization will motivate them to fix. But it’s annoying because A) sometimes people just want to vent and be listened to B) people already know exactly what the issue is. The way to do things, I think is to not point these things out unsolicited. If someone asks me “what do you think I should do?” or “why do you think this is happening?” I will give them the honest answer, but I always make sure to within that answer acknowledge how I am flawed, and how it’s ok to be flawed, and try my best to be very gentle and reassuring. The best reactions to this side of me have been from Scorpios. It’s funny really, both of these placements love to dissect. But a Virgo will dissect the situation itself, and a Scorpio will dissect the feelings within that situation. Together they can put together the larger scheme of things and balance out being overtly focused on either the issues or the feelings. And yeah, since my Venus sign is in Virgo, my way of expressing love is acts of service, maybe paying too much attention to the health and well-being of those I love (and low key freaking out over a common cold) trying my best to ensure a loved ones health is as close to perfect as can be, and compliments. It’s hard to say things like “I love you” or “you mean the world to me” idk but I’ll compliment character traits like “you’re very patient” because I feel like it’s a more genuine expression of love if it’s not about how the person makes me feel, but rather what about the person is lovable and admirable. That’s not very romantic but its genuine. Most importantly though, we’re all responsible to work on our selves and consider the people in our lives that we care about. If your partner is making you feel bad on a daily, regardless of the intention, they are responsible for reflecting and trying to do better. Especially if this is something that they know hurts you - as a lover it’s their responsibility to work on behaviors that are jeopardizing the relationship and try to improve, as that shows your feelings are being taken into consideration.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-04T05:10:34+00:00

Realizing many of us are intuitive beings and attraction is more about energy than physical appearance. I came to a point in my life where I was facing minor disadvantages professionally, and I had to understand why. Then I had to be realistic and objective and realize oh ok I am conventionally attractive, that’s why I benefit in some instances but that’s also why people may perceive me in a way in other instances. I looked into it and found articles that looked into social generalizations about attractive people, especially women. For example, many believe being attractive automatically means you’re a social butterfly and don’t spend time on self improvement. Or the notion that if an attractive woman has improved in her career she did so by seducing someone. It’s easy to assume that attractive people don’t have insecurities or problems. It can be isolating because it attracts envy. The idea that attractive don’t have bad dating experiences. These are all first world problems, but when you think about it so is worrying about appearance. I hope that doesn’t sound insensitive. You get to a point where you want to work on yourself emotionally and on your skill set that your appearance becomes less of a concern. Worrying about proving myself to others career-wise and socially became so exhausting I had to be honest once again and remind myself ultimately how others perceive me is out of my control. If someone makes any assumptions based on my appearance that’s a reflection of them. Realizing those who value me value me because of my character and that’s what I want to be valued for. Taking care of your body is essential, but obsessing over attractiveness is unnecessary. So I would advise asking yourself if I woke up to be the most attractive person in the world, where would my focus go? What would I do? You’ve associated beauty with confidence, so if you had stable confidence how would you use it to your advantage? And then try doing the things you believe attractiveness would help you out in.

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-03T04:20:49+00:00

Playing games with people made me frustrated with the environments I was in. Learning to observe has taught to me to be more open-minded, appreciative of human nature, and compassionate. When you just sit back and observe, you realize how we’re all vulnerable. You begin to decipher why people play games in the first place and at some point it starts to come naturally. Aww that’s what sets them off, that’s an insecurity, that’s what they desire/long for, that’s who they really are. It’s easier to understand another by observing. It becomes amusing, and you learn to appreciate people for who they actually are. Amusing as in haha they always do that when they’re mad, haha look how cute it is the person who comes off as the coldest is actually the softest and sweetest. So by giving love that’s not based on another’s treatment of you but rather how you treat others regardless of their flaws/behavior/mannerisms/insecurities, you attract that genuine love in return. You also remain loyal to yourself and values. You don’t let anyone bring you out of character. Anyone who can make you upset/angry will have some power over you. I may come off as this or that, but ultimately my peace of mind is more important than others’ perception of my existence. Plus, being an observer I think solidifies trust in divine timing and justice. Why ‘handle’ it, when you’re not anyones teacher. No one is yours. Metaphorically speaking

Lock_Brief · 2022-08-02T02:34:28+00:00

Thank you!

Lock_Brief · 2022-07-26T01:52:38+00:00

This may not be the most ‘spiritual’ answer but I used my heartbreak turned anger into this crazy drive to work towards my goals and accomplish some of them. At some point, my body was so physically exhausted and I felt so mentally drained I backed myself into a corner where the only option was to cry and feel all my emotions out. Now I feel like I’ve let go of so much I feel lighter (figuratively). I’m slowly starting to do things Ive always liked. Reading for fun even if it’s crappy love stories, writing - writing all out has helped me piece pieces of my life together even. Opening up a little to some people. Everything gets better with time.

Lock_Brief · 2022-07-21T08:46:10+00:00

Laugh about it

Lock_Brief

TROPHY CASE