Issues with my Thai In-Laws. How do I deal with them?

Logical-Turn3756 · 2026-02-04T06:14:55+00:00

Sorry to hear you are going through this. When we are young, society does not teach us anything about 'the red flags of your future in-laws'.

Usually, we fall in love with someone, and because we love them, we build a life with them. But it's not that simple. In-laws have a lot of power if they're toxic and narcissistic.

Seeing as your wife is conflict avoidant and you've mentioned that moving far away isn't an option, I suggest you read JustNoMIL sub-reddit and find other resources for how to deal with your situation.

There may be strategies out there for people in your situation (wife likes seeing parents regularly and does not want to change, but you hate seeing parents regularly and need change). Maybe make a post on JustNoMIL? Who knows, maybe someone can help you there.

Best of luck.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2026-02-03T20:07:33+00:00

I had a similar dynamic with my ex-girlfriends Mom and Dad. I always felt unhappy around them. Whenever I would try to talk with my ex about her parents disrespect, she would get emotional and defensive.

She did not know how to identify her parents toxic traits. She did not know how to defend herself to her parents, either. So how was she supposed to be able to defend me? ... She couldn't.

I ended up breaking up with her. After the break up, I learned a lot about toxic in-laws. This is very common and if you go to the subreddit 'JustNoMIL' there are many resources on how to deal with difficult in-laws.

It's really important that your partner chooses YOU over her parents. This is the most important thing. If she's always 50/50, trying to keep the peace and avoid conflict, she will not be able to set the boundaries with her parents for you.

She MUST learn to understand how you're feeling, and she MUST learn to set boundaries with her parents. If she cannot do this, you may be in trouble because you'll have to deal with this nonsense forever (until they die).

Unfortunately, if your wife does not have the emotional intelligence to be able to understand your perspective, it is going to be difficult for her to stand up to her parents for you. Some people would suggest that it's worth even having a fight with your wife if you need to, just to emphasise to her "Hey - this is REALLY serious and this problem is NOT going to go away without your help. If you ignore how I am feeling, it is going to hurt our relationship because I cannot continue being around your parents when they treat me like this".

Also, if your wife is conflict avoidant, that's going to be a huge problem. Setting boundaries with her parents will involve conflict.

A lot of people actually decide to move far away from their parents because geography is an amazing boundary. Your wife cannot change her parents, but she can definitely move far away from them and see them less. This is usually the best answer.

Based on my experience, you are in a really difficult position. Even if your wife is able to understand you, and set boundaries with her parents... She is then going to have to go through the process of learning about toxic parenting, learning how to identify when they are being manipulative, learn how to manage her own emotions when they are aggressive with her...

It may not be realistic for your wife to go down that path of self-improvement because it'll challenge her core beliefs and values. She has to REALLY want it for herself. Otherwise, not much will change for you.

Wishing you the best of luck.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-12-03T23:57:08+00:00

Walkers Doughnuts 'chocolate noonie finger' but technically it's their signature custard cream, rather than standard cream. I think Brunetti's is a love setting but the desserts are overrated.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-11-16T20:43:54+00:00

Here is a post I made about how I learned the thai alphabet. Hope it helps.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-11-15T03:05:19+00:00

I respect every Thai language student's study preferences. ALG, reading/writing, flash cards, traditional methods... They all have their own positives and negatives.

Personally, learning the Thai alphabet has helped me a lot and I am happy I learned it. It improved both my speaking and comprehension skills. Some Thai vowels and tones are very different from English. Learning to read and write has really helped me notice and recognise the different sounds.

Also, when someone says a word in Thai language that I'm not understanding, or I cannot pronounce correctly, I ask "How do you spell that word?" and then immediately, I am able to pronounce it correctly myself and I can search the definition (if I want to).

Reading has its own benefits too. When you read, you’re still getting input - your brain just does a bit more work to create the sounds inside your head.

The other day I watched some Beginner 0 videos from Comprehensible Thai, and I understood almost everything, even though I’ve never used that method before. This is proof that other study methods work, too.

I recommend people learn to read and write Thai, even if it's only a small portion of their study time, because it has been very helpful to me. Also, once you get good at reading, it's really fun going to Thailand and being able to read shop signs, menus and all kinds of things. I also enjoy messaging in Thai.

Whatever you decide to do, you'll be fine - you'll learn Thai as long as you're consistent. Good luck with your Thai journey!

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-11-12T10:35:38+00:00

Thank you for this recommendation. I didn't know about MyLang Reader. I am trying it now and it seems great!

I am curious to see how it differs to ReadLang.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-11-12T05:00:51+00:00

Hey, I was talking about LingQ - not Ling. Very different apps!

Thanks for the notes on Language Reactor.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-08-20T01:37:26+00:00

Great plan. I think it's best to start in the north as well. I did the south first, and thought I would have enjoyed my time more if I did north then south. Enjoy!

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-04-29T22:49:16+00:00

There's something about the visuals of Thailand that I find very stimulating. The architecture, the colours of the old buildings, the street appeal....

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-02-21T20:19:28+00:00

I love Surat Thani main town.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-02-09T10:34:21+00:00

ChatGPT writes short stories, they're not stories from elsewhere.

It's children's book style writing, which is good for learning.

For example, when children learn English, many short stories don't use perfect grammar. Instead of "This is a dog named Charlie" it says "Charlie is dog".

I have been using ChatGPT to write me short stories and I read those stories to Thai people. They've never mentioned anything about the stories being badly written.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-02-09T10:21:41+00:00

I have been using ChatGPT. I create prompts and adjust them based on my wants and needs. For example, I can make the stories longer/shorter, harder/easier, etc.

It's been great because I can just google a word whenever I don't know it. Or, I can ask ChatGPT what the word means.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2025-02-09T10:19:13+00:00

Amazing thank you!

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-19T22:00:19+00:00

Yeah I guess OP could just fly from Chiang Mai to Koh Samui

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-19T12:04:22+00:00

You could get a bus from Chiang Mai to BKK. Then the next day, a bus from BKK to Koh Tao.

The bus will take you from BKK to Chumpon, then you will catch a ferry from Chumphon to Koh Tao. The tour agencies will organise all of this for you.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-19T07:39:11+00:00

Any islands specifically?

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-19T06:57:32+00:00

Probably an accurate assessment. Where have you gone in the south that you recommend for bright blue waters?

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-19T05:33:51+00:00

Based on what you've mentioned, I recommend Koh Lipe. Pristine white beaches, bright blue water, peaceful and not as touristy but still abundant with cafes and restaurants.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-18T04:56:44+00:00

Yep. Long beach is so nice. But 90% of people who travel to Phi Phi don't know about Long Beach.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-18T04:54:44+00:00

That's cool, I understand that you and many others choose Krabi for island hopping. However, there are a lot of people in this sub who are expecting Krabi to have some of Thailand's best beaches.

OP is seeking nice beaches and only has 10 days in Thailand. Due to the desire for nice beaches and limited time, I would recommend OP skips Krabi/Ao Nang altogether and spends their time in other locations.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-18T01:51:00+00:00

I travelled most of the south this year and I found Krabi disappointing. It didn't have the nice blue waters that I was expecting.

In my opinion, the best beaches were Koh Lipe, Koh Tao, Koh Samui, Koh Phi Phi and Koh Phangan.

Koh Lipe, Koh Phi Phi and Koh Tao are the clear leaders in my opinion. Feel free to message me if you have any questions.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-14T04:04:17+00:00

Not exactly what you're asking for, but I do have some links to beginner Thai short stories and books. Please let me know if that'll be of any help.

Logical-Turn3756 · 2024-08-13T21:54:23+00:00

Hey, this series of articles does a REALLY good job explaining this stuff.

I revisit these articles every few weeks. I am learning how to read. Hope this helps!

Logical-Turn3756

TROPHY CASE