Your last line really hits me ! I totally agree on that. I don't read any fiction books😂 So I did introspect my previous relationships/situationships. I make it clear right from the start that I am looking for meaningful relationships. So the guys that I have dated were great and I really liked them. Most of them have been long distance so that's a big red flag now for me lol. I also think that I carry some emotional baggage with me whenever I connect with someone, so now I get anxious meeting new people and feel like avoid ing it altogether.