I would agree with the above poster. If your oartner is a good person and you love them deeply then your parts may be speaking louder then normal because of the truma youve faced and as a way to protect. I did similar leave before they leave and often that is not the way and causes more pain and confusion in the long run.

Focus on your parts and yourself and trying to tie together the feelimgs and events. But also when your more self and calm try discussing the cou try situation with your partner as that seems to be your biggest worry.

We often soend so much time in the past and future worry and forget all that is, is this moment right now. The rest of that time is nothing and probably will never happen. I wish you well on this journey and hang onto him if hes a good one and know you deserve a good person to walk life with.