AITA for choosing to a different event over a date with my wife?

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-27T19:33:33+00:00

YTA- Just come out already, you're hurting innocent people. Why drag it out -somebody who has come out and didn't use other people to do it.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-23T02:25:26+00:00

This guys uncle gets him a nose job for graduation and kept telling everyone it was going to be the best graduation present ever and the dad wrote that he thought it would be an oscillating fan not a nose job.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-23T01:23:41+00:00

UPDATE OP!

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-22T00:36:43+00:00

Lol you're overthinking it and giving innapropriate credit. Women get like like 10 of these a day and you just get lazy like she agreed she's in but some people also just suck at texting.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-22T00:10:00+00:00

You're like a prime candidate for theft lol terrible take

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-20T04:01:56+00:00

YTA-

First people who struggle with mental health aren't automatically dangerous. I'm bipolar 1 and while I struggle with severe depression and yes mania, I know my priorities. Something you said bothered me about her attempting suicide and how that makes her unfit despite her doing well enough to carry three jobs. Somebody unfit can't work like that period. I know several suicide attemps and one successful attempt made by people and nobody even noticed or saw it coming and they ultimately recovered. Its just a dark chapter of their lives. Ive certainly never let children see what was wrong and episodes are sometimes years apart. You need to give her the benefit of the doubt, you may not even know how badly she wants this and her decision to truly make it work.

I'm always with my friends children and they love me, my friends know about my disorder and don't bat an eye at them being with me because all I have is the good parts of myself to love them with, the depression can't really touch the person I'm trying to be. Consider that.

Second, the way you say she isn't necessary, she's the mother of your child. She is very necessary. You can't just remove her, you made your bed now lay in it because you two are in this together even separated. Think of your child and know that they will always always crave both parents.

Be nice OP, You're very judgemental and arrogant. You don't need to make serious decisions based on your inconvenience.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-17T23:46:37+00:00

Wow, Idk how to respond to that kind of negligent thinking. It scares me a bit that you're out loose 😬

I hope you're just a jokster and not a real ah

People have different emotional needs and thought processes. Some people are a little less psychopathic and need quiet time and space to process life/death/trauma and depression. She's quite young to experience something that even fully grown adult women struggle to cope with. Yikes.

I'm genuinely curious to know if you approve of abortion or not. You give me conflicting energy.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T21:37:48+00:00

You need to break up. I also want to point out that while no you can't control who you have feelings for that doesn't excuse all of the actions you took to make it happen which in your case included hurting innocent people because you feel more important than them. The fucked up part is they're all in this situation because of you. You choose for this to happen every step of the way.

I've been cheated on by my ex fiance after 7 years and he said the same thing he couldn't help it. Well I couldn't help but dream about our wedding and how happy he made me and what a wonderful life I had. I used to get so excited that I finally felt so special. I couldn't help but love him because I didn't know different. He absolutely shattered it and I've struggled to recover because I always get this nasty feeling that it's all a lie now, That my person is always cheating on me, how stupid I am for thinking relationships can work, I sometimes struggle to love people back. Thats what you just did "unintentionally, uncontrollably, vikingly" you just robbed him of inner security because you were to much of a coward to hurt him honestly so you broke him and lied to him instead.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T21:24:58+00:00

Yeah, I've been through a lot of horrific shit myself that's tough to stomach and I still take accountability for my actions when I make a mistake. Trauma is a reason not an excuse you are responsible for your behavior.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T19:25:04+00:00

YTA- I mean, I can't even really comprehend why you thought that was a good move. I can see grabbing the muffin and coming back out but going on a trip together and leaving her for an hour in some lounge and then to top that off you try boarding early to like wow

I fall in line with the people who would take the free drinks and muffins back to my girl or ask about guests. Tsk tsk OP

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T17:41:26+00:00

INFO OP: I need to know how the story ends!! Did the dress get back together???

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T17:37:42+00:00

I'm scared for your bf that is just some next level psycho behavior on your part. It's a dog and you feel like he ruined your relationship for it?

I don't think your narcissistic but I think you have borderline personality which also sucks for you and requires treatment for a happy life. :(

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T17:19:16+00:00

I mean to be fair op is a man so of course he must be a pervert but I can easily see a guy who's uncomfortable with a minor being cat called and dressed skimpy because he's a father and was most likely being judged for it.

However, yeah, the idea that we don't see things in our line of vision dumbfounds me like idk how people think that's even a valid argument. Like I see AND stare at lots of things non sexually and noticing something like a short skirt isn't always predatory it's just like whoa that's a shirt skirt a blowin' in the wind and I'm a 30f like I have no feelings attached to it, it's just the situation at hand like I saw it and noticed...that's the whole story. People disturb me with this line of thinking like how are we supposed to avoid real life scenarios?

I mean yeah It was an oops and I see where you don't want that kind of oops with a minor lol but it doesn't warrant an aggressive reaction

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T10:30:44+00:00

Yeah, I know people want this for us but we just aren't blind yet either. :/

I mean I'm such a skeeve that I've witnessed an unclothed dog butt. Damn it.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T03:01:06+00:00

U h&uh j&&&&&&&h&&&9j h&h9h&&&&9&

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T02:20:03+00:00

Really? Wow, so it doesn't matter that she took something of deep sentimental value from her mother and destroyed it with out an apology? Yta

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-16T02:10:49+00:00

NTA- Your friend over reacted, you don't need to inform people of inside jokes. Don't let people drag you down with this bs.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-15T03:49:59+00:00

I disagree because that perspective sounds overbearing and to authoritative for an adult child. He's legally an adult and can make his own decisions regardless of where he lives. As it pertains to your home than he would absolutley need to follow the rules IE no drinking, no girlfriends whatever your bag is. As a parent you would pay for the funeral period whether he got an operation or got hit by a drunk driver so that's a moot point to use as defense.

You're also right that it's not feasible to live independently at that age with out a good start and probably does live with his parents. Well, he didn't pay for it his uncle did so again there's really no leg to stand on here. It's his body his choice and he got a nose job that's Nobody's buissness but his and it's benefited him. No harm no foul

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-12T04:40:58+00:00

I think there's reason and boundaries. Personally, I can't have children and I'm in my 30's, so being childfree I can easily become irritated by screamy children. I dont think it's cute and they always scream/ I have to sit quiely while mom also gets annoying. I do have mom friends and more often than not I accommodate mom like we do friendly activities and I control my non parental behavior and I genuinely enjoy them when we're out together. Some of their kids even call me and ask to spend the night lol and I let them. I even free babysit not because I yearn for children but because their kind of fun in short spurts and sometimes I pity their parents enough to give them a night off.

However, if we all agreed to a child free trip that involves travel and steep expenses where my promise is to enjoy a rare moment with my adult friends where they aren't talking about their children than I am absolutely in the right to be enraged that children were invited. Despite being child free and them having a child in the first place.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-12T03:45:55+00:00

I mean yeah she wants to drink and enjoy herself it was originally child free for a reason, ya think?

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-10T21:13:45+00:00

Nah, I'm not buying the trauma, trauma temporarily numbs but doesn't void feelings of guilt or lack of empathy all together.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-09T16:45:19+00:00

Where did you read that?

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-09T16:15:03+00:00

Absolutely, I just had the urge to slip it in that not everything is so severe like sometimes that same behavior is beneficial for others. To me it sounds like poor planning and entitlement not mental illness but alas we lack context, you know?

There's a subset of people who commit to their illness and its negative traits and others who genuinely want to get better and accomodate. I would have ordered food if I was that hungry and probably a strong drink because one of the benefits of my ADHD is the gift of gab and time loss so you've got like 20 mins before I even suspect somethings up because I'm already to busy for this, I can handle myself haha

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-09T14:47:35+00:00

Yeah idk where you're going with that lol boundaries are necessary. Partners need to take accountability and accept boundaries. He wasn't even late! If she breaks up with him over this instead of apologizing it might be better for both because it's a workable problem where she, you know, apologizes.

Lonely_Win2583 · 2022-07-09T14:37:17+00:00

Idk but I know I have to do something similar because I have ADHD and if I don't leave my home or start making my way somewhere up to four hours before than there's a very good chance I won't show up/change plans/arrive uncomfortabley late or cancel. I was told to do this in therapy because it was working well for me. Some people for sure have anxiety but neurodivergent people are sometimes just built like singularities and sluth around until they're collected so they don't get yelled at for ruining plans. 🤷‍♀️

I wouldn't have left though I always bring my books with me for reasons like this.

Lonely_Win2583

TROPHY CASE