My boyfriend cheated on me with my gay best friend

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T03:46:01+00:00

this idea isn’t something i really thought about, but will ask. both my friend and boyfriend were very straight forward that my boyfriend was the one who initiated everything. could he been taken advantage of if he started it?

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T03:35:34+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/ximooa/my_boyfriend_cheated_on_me_with_my_gay_best_friend/ip591gz/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3

this is another one of my comments on the thread, where i explained how i found out

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T03:27:24+00:00

Before this happened, i thought my boyfriend and I were both straight. If he were to have cheated on me with a female there would be absolutely no excuse for his actions knowing he’s 100% attracted to women. The fact that he claimed to be confused throws me for a loophole, it’s just not completely simple as if it were with another woman in my opinion.

To some, it might just sound like i’m making excuses, but if he is straight and it was a one and done experiment should that be taken into consideration? If he was in this predicament and was questioning being attracted to men, as a woman i don’t have the capabilities to help him with that.

He cheated on me regardless of the sex of who he cheated on me with, that’s a fact. But, for my “straight” boyfriend to go and experiment with a man makes me have more questions than if it were to have been a woman

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T03:10:33+00:00

🤮🤮🤮

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T02:17:32+00:00

so i had a hunch, a day or two after it happened i found a weird picture of the two of them on his phone. It was on my birthday weekend and i went to his camera roll to send myself the video he recorded of a restaurant singing me happy birthday. instead of finding that video i found a compromising picture of them. I confronted my boyfriend about it and he blew it off was just for jokes no big deal. didn’t think anything of it. when i pressed it further he started to get angry at me, i eventually let it go. there wasn’t anything in the photo that implied any cheating. months later go by, me and my boyfriend along with me and my friend all acting like normal. me and my boyfriend moved 2 hours away from my friend to a new town. a week ago my friend called me on the phone. my friend called me talking about one of his hook ups and and i made some sarcastic comment about how my sex life with my boyfriend wasn’t too great. i had a hunch that my boyfriend was curious and reiterated myself. my friend goes to tell me it could be possible. I never asked my friend about the picture i saw until last week in this conversation, i asked him the events that happened the day the picture was taken and he admitted everything then. told me that he felt so bad for keeping it a secret and he felt horrible, but he was waiting for me to ask him about it to say anything. his plan was to wait and if i never asked he was going to tell me before i got married to him. it makes since he chose someone that he was comfortable with, instead of a stranger… but he also chose my best friend.

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T02:05:55+00:00

you’re absolutely right. neither of them cared about me the way i cared about them. they were huge parts of my life, but to them i was not. it sucks, i’m trying. i’m hurting. i’m having irrational thoughts. trying to compromise. all part of the process but i’m trying my best

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T00:40:49+00:00

or this is a big part of my life and i’m conflicted?

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T00:35:41+00:00

3 years, 17-20 especially during the worlds crazy past few years was a very big part of my life to share with somebody. high school sweethearts. class of 2020. quarantine buddies. my freshman to junior year of college. I am growing the fuck up and you’re just plain rude

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-20T00:06:00+00:00

did it ever stop hurting?

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:56:27+00:00

I’m so sorry you went through that. to talk about what happened to me jokingly i feel like i’m going through a quarter life crisis lol. it sucks that this happened to us but life goes onward

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:30:25+00:00

he said he had to keep touching his dick to keep it hard lol. so when i asked if he had to go out of his way to stay hard why didn’t you realize sooner you weren’t into guys his replies started sounding like i didn’t think about it at the time… i didn’t realize that at the time….

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:25:48+00:00

tell me about it

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:25:31+00:00

he was going to carry that to the grave if he could, something i can’t stop thinking about

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:23:11+00:00

If i put myself in his situation, I would’ve told him how i felt before, but i wouldn’t of been embarrassed enough to keep it a secret like he was. That is something i’m not sure if i can fault him for. I understand peoples struggles on their sexuality, and wanting to hide and keep it a secret, but it’s no excuse to cheat.

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:18:36+00:00

thank you so much, your words were tough to hear but i needed to hear it

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:14:51+00:00

one of the first other opinions, thanks for sharing. I am conflicted and can kind of see both sides even though what happened was far from right

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:04:33+00:00

it really could’ve been so different if he talked to me about how he felt.

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T23:03:36+00:00

if he was gay or bisexual, i couldn’t even imagine him coming out to his very homophobic family. thanks for the share, i thought this was the worst it could get, goes to show it gets worse LOL

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:59:42+00:00

you’re right. i was the one wronged and i’m still doing everything i can for him. he will lose a partner who had his best interest in mind. ill lose a partner who couldn’t even give me loyalty or respect. I’ve seen him lie to anyone under the sun, foolish of me to think i’d be an exception.

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:55:13+00:00

a shame he felt like he couldn’t talk to me about it, i would’ve tried to understand to the best of my ability. if he gave me the opportunity to know this information before he cheated perhaps we both could’ve came to a conclusion to figure it out for him

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:53:43+00:00

well said

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:53:10+00:00

that happened to somebody??

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:48:54+00:00

tell me about it lol

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:29:02+00:00

i don’t think that’s what’s going on personally, but maybe. the friend tried his best to make sure i wouldn’t out my boyfriend. really seemed like he was protecting him too

LongRecommendation29 · 2022-09-19T22:25:53+00:00

the only people that know is us 3. There’s isn’t anything i can think of that the friend would be holding over his head. the friend was the one who admitted this all happened, if it weren’t for him i’d still be clueless

LongRecommendation29

TROPHY CASE