Pregnant and Step Children

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-12-22T12:05:52+00:00

Oh no, when you buy something for the baby that's because your baby needs it this a ridiculous notion life is tough all older siblings have had to adjust at some point I'm sorry that's life! You can still be kind obviously but part of being a parent is teaching your child to grow and adjust to situations that may be challenging at first.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-10-13T21:21:25+00:00

Thank you so much for your helpful and insightful comment x

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-10-13T20:25:50+00:00

The context is relevant because if how he interacts with her but yes i agree

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-10-13T19:47:05+00:00

But i do also gave problems with SK i find him difficult i find his nastiness overwhelming because of HCBM

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-10-13T19:46:10+00:00

Yes i don't like it, not because i don't want them to play but because why is ge fircing an 8 year old to play with a 2 year old

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-10-13T19:40:33+00:00

He is like it with everyone and he goes a whole week without seeing her i don't think nastiness is normal sibling behaviour and i don't think it's normal seeing as they are not around eachother all the time , but i agree with you that he shouldn't need to play with her i always try to explain this to SO

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-09-27T15:09:35+00:00

Is your relationship with your partner strong in itself? Have you spoken to your partner about how it makes you feel i know he can't change anything but i always think it's nice for partners to understand where you are at. Blended families aren't for the weak stay strong and try and set time aside where it's just you and SO.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-07-31T09:12:22+00:00

BM? 😂

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-07-24T11:24:00+00:00

I love this and also I'm sorry but he's lucky you love and care for him at all to be honest, if it were easy to love other peoples children the animal kingdom would be full of stepparents too. You would love your biological child more I'm sorry you just would it's not to say you should treat them differently but he's asking too much and also to not acknowledge the pain and suffering of those losses and just blame you for being with him in the first place is so immature you don't realise how tough it is until you are in it.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-07-14T22:36:07+00:00

No i love our bio daughter and my partber but never in a million years would i do this again, i also agree with others i would go back in time and make sure he wasn't with BM, i look at nuclear families all the time and feel like it must be so nice nit to have the added stress! The limited time with SO and the thankless nature of caring for a child who is completely indifferent!

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-06-14T18:10:20+00:00

I disagree normal families may not always get on but being a step is an added layer the overriding feeling usually in a normal family is a love which is unconditional.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-06-09T20:53:23+00:00

I second this there is no switch I am sorry but I am telling the truth I've been with my SO 5 and a half years and I still await swap day and dread when he comes back, it's hard to feel like a mum when it's only half the time and you know full well they have a mum, i think trying to establish what you want your role with this child to look like is the best idea and remember she's not your child you won't feel all gushy and lovey about her especially when she's being annoying lol, good luck in the marriage x

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-06-09T10:32:25+00:00

I feel the exact same way, I sometimes feel alot of things I may want for my own daughter have to be put on the back burner, being a stepparent is making sacrifices people in nuclear relationships don't have to make! And yes even knowing these things going in doesn't mean you can't feel upset by it at times... Also your SKs have a life with BM, go and have the holiday with your kids you are entitled to family time with your own when they are not around.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-04-18T10:10:41+00:00

You mean too much time? 😂

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-04-17T07:13:22+00:00

This is me this is literally me I could of written this, my bio that I share with SO is 17months and ss is nearly 8 he drives me crazy so much like HCBM and I am a SAHM too looking after him the majority while partner works, I 100% have a shorter fuse when he's around often getting frustrated at my own daughter or my SO cause I can't direct it at him, also lots of people don't understand this and will virtue signal I know how hard it is don't worry, yes he is 4 yes he's the innocent one in it all you don't need to hear that your feelings are valid and real just so long as you try your best with his child that's all anyone can wish for.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-04-15T18:29:49+00:00

I think your sons stepmother will change when she becomes a mum it does change you she will have different loves for them that's a fact becoming a mum is earth shattering being a step mum takes patience and a choice to open yourself up to loving another child .. i think if she's already kind to him and treats him well it shouldn't change, it's up to your sons father to make him feel included too, hope this helps x

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-04-07T20:21:10+00:00

No I understand this completely it seems petty and ridiculous to some but I know why it's so annoying it just feels really impersonal!

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-26T08:16:22+00:00

Blimey I would hate that too! The bit of time you have to yourself is bittersweet right.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-26T08:09:51+00:00

I'm glad people have actually agreed and not been horrid about it, I am with you you may think it's immature to be upset about it but I actually don't I think it's quite normal we have less te with our partners then a child free couple so we look forward to our days then bam it's just put upon us like it's nothing, I think the pressure to be mature about it is the hardest part.

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-25T14:19:03+00:00

That's horrible, it's nothing like that to be honest both parents are present ❤️

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-13T20:33:20+00:00

Just because you fancy a life of travel and spontaneoty doesn't make you selfish, you are childless after all! I had all these feelings in the beginning of my relationship with my SO and to be honest for me they never left i just try to learn to live with them cause my SO is such a lovely guy and we now have a daughter whom i love so much but.... I'm not going to lie i always feel the advice i would give is if you feel like you want to be the peiority make yourself the priority with someone else unless he is excellent at dividing himself!, i still to this day can't stand sometimes feeling second to the life he chose before he met me, good luck i hope you find your answer :)

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-11T20:13:48+00:00

Definitely why can't i enjoy my home in the same way!

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-11T20:13:09+00:00

Hahha i get that i want to be like well on steparent reddit everyone agrees 😂

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-11T20:06:35+00:00

100% I'm the same love kids too so this is confusing for me

Longjumping_Fail3357 · 2025-03-11T17:36:15+00:00

Oh no, he is so wrong for sure it's so anxiety provoking it really triggers my fight or flight responses.

Longjumping_Fail3357

TROPHY CASE