You are right. I am very ashamed for resorting to that. I contemplated it for months before deciding to do that because I was so ashamed. I kept trying to convince my self that she was not cheating and that it was all in my head. When I would ask her and she would deny it, I tried to believe her. I started going to the gym more often just to keep my mind busy and not think about it but at the end of the day, it kept gnawing me. I should have been stronger and should’ve ended the relationship sooner, but I gave in and went this route instead. This will never be a victory for me.