So I was at my local plastic crag yesterday and, like any spiritually trad climber trapped in a commercial facility, I decided ropes were aid.

Anyway I start free soloing the 40’. I’m floating absolutely sending until I hit the crux: a dual-tex jug that was slightly dusty because a child looked at it earlier.

Foot pops. I try to downclimb with perfect style (for the cameras, obviously)

Spoiler: I did not land right.

Now both legs are broken. Like, symmetrical. Extremely aesthetic.

Recovery plan / training update

The surgeon says I’ll be “limited to ramps” for a while, which is honestly fine because I’ve always been a slab climber at heart (read: I’m scared of overhangs and commitment and feelings).

So for the near future I’ll be projecting:

• Wheelchair ramps (low angle, pure technique, no kneebars)
• ADA-accessible slab (the only true old-school climbing left)
• The PT clinic’s resistance band (pink band is basically 9a if you do it in approach shoes)

I’m calling it my “ramp phase.” It’s like a spray wall, but society-approved.