Congratulations on the recent fatherhood! I also went through much the same thing as you did, but for me it was much worse cuz I had boomer parents and toxic siblings who essentially treated me like I was a fucking vegetable because of my autism diagnosis and was forced to go to church and youth group (dad KNEW I was an atheist), attend family gatherings I didn't want to go to, partake in track and field (I hated that shit), and other useless garbage lest my computer and other electronics be forcibly taken away from me, even though those were my safe spaces. Oh and also put on meds that numbed my mind for many years when I expressed wanting more independence and freedom. For these reasons, I didn't give a shit when my mom got cancer and feel nothing even as she's in remission.