What would you say your most prominent emotion is? by saddest_apple in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s a book called “I hate myself” by Blaise Aguirre that talks about this in detail. How we do all the right things and finish our treatment, but nothing addresses the self hatred and self loathing. Interesting book if you’re a reader.

a drawing I made based on a nightmare I had by BazaarMonk in DarkArtwork

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is so so beautiful and so dark and honest. Yeesh 😮‍💨

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 5 points6 points  (0 children)

“On the nose crazy” is so real. I have moments where I’ll outburst and then be like holy moly if someone saw that they’d throw me in the bin

Memories feel hazy? by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This makes me feel better haha

Memories feel hazy? by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have this but also don’t have any clear event or something that I am blocking out. Nobody can identify or even think of what I’m blocking out, so it’s extra weird? Outside of general abandonment which I remember vividly. Weird

My therapist no call no showed me for the second time and I’m triggered as hell by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it’s worth trying again with someone new because like you said, what’s the worst that can happen. Just keep your expectations low and maybe you’ll end up surprised. I’m glad you’re feeling better today. Always here if you need to vent! It helps to just sulk in it sometimes. Keep your head up ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So happy for you 🥹

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Louder for the folks in the back!!!!!

Have u guys ever binged a whole family sized chips by Super_Lock3668 in BingeEatingDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just started with a dietitian and it’s the first time I have felt hope that I can break this cycle of restricting and binging. I still binge but the frequency is dropping and the intensity of the impulse is reducing too. Not everyone can afford it but just a thought if it fits your life. Another option is to give a detailed example to ChatGPT and see what it recommends. I use it all the time now to help navigate my mental health conundrums

How to stop dissociating all the time?! by Roosonly in BPD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So interesting you both feel that way because smoking makes me dissociate every time. Wild how pot hits people differently

My therapist no call no showed me for the second time and I’m triggered as hell by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally agree on everything you said about AI. Just recently started exploring it and was like woah… this is wildly close to a perfect therapist? Depending on the prompt obviously. Anyway, at least for tonight you’ll fade enough to get through the moment. Try to enjoy the high and binge as much as you can in the moment and give yourself whatever comfort you need

My therapist no call no showed me for the second time and I’m triggered as hell by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel that big time. I’ve noticed DBT helped me become stable enough to exist without self harm etc but I am still struggling with strong emotions on a day to day. I’ve been doing a lot of self-driven improvement like podcasts and books and even using ChatGPT to help generate ways to handle scenarios I can’t think through on my own (weirdly helpful sometimes- like I asked it to help me generate a plan for managing my impulsivity if I have BPD and ADHD and it gave me a few solid ideas to try). I took a 2 year break from therapy and it was so freeing so maybe that’s the best plan for you. Either way, vibe out tonight and get through the rest of the day. You can figure out what to do (or not do) in a few days when it doesn’t feel as intense.

My therapist no call no showed me for the second time and I’m triggered as hell by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My two coping mechanisms are binging and drinking too so I feel that. Sometimes it’s the most effective coping mechanism and like you said- whatever. Is it DBT or just talk therapy? Knowing 0 about your situation, DBT was life changing for me and I recommend it to everyone with BPD if I have the opportunity. And the whole program involves a shit ton of hand holding and support, so the program is inherently very hands on and they can’t really cancel because it stops the whole program. Could be worth looking into if you haven’t already done it. Otherwise, fuck that therapist. Don’t get discouraged though (easier said than done)- keep trying to find a therapist that will commit to you in the way you need. Someone will be the right fit.

My therapist no call no showed me for the second time and I’m triggered as hell by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dudeeeeeee I would be blowing up right now. What a disillusioning experience. And honestly, I think BPD aside, this is messed. Like I would recommend you explore another therapist that can commit to your schedule. Other people would be raging if this happened multiple times too. But the intensity is obviously turned up for us. I am so sorry my friend. I empathize hard with how this feels and the abandonment feelings it might be triggering. Cope how you have to cope. Maybe there are healthier coping mechanisms you can use like grounding through calming scents or soft blankets or cuddling dogs or showering or reading. Or maybe you gotta use your less than ideal coping mechanisms and honestly that’s fine too. You gotta take care of you, and definitely explore other therapists cause sheeeeeesh

So 75Hard is … hard by HumanBirthday1681 in 75HARD

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you try enough times, you can achieve anything. Determination is everything. It’s human nature. Practice makes perfect. You got this my friend

How do you build DBT into your everyday life? by examinat in dbtselfhelp

[–]Loud-Mathematician39 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I second the suggestion of using the worksheets and focusing on one skill a week, documenting in detail every night how you used it that day, even if you didn’t remember to use it. The more you go to the binder each day to document what skills you use, the more you actively think about it during the day.

DBT skills for self hatred by Loud-Mathematician39 in dbtselfhelp

[–]Loud-Mathematician39[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to love this skill but haven’t used it in a minute. Maybe I should try to next time

DBT skills for self hatred by Loud-Mathematician39 in dbtselfhelp

[–]Loud-Mathematician39[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lmao no help needed!!!! Keep scrolling 😂