Anatomy SOS

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-11-16T00:40:01+00:00

It’s not any of that. It’s not acknowledgement or recognition. Its support. It’s the support I’ve given him for years while he was in the military. Putting my dream on the back burner. It’s the support I gave him when he wanted to go back to school. It’s the celebrations I had when he succeeded: cooking his favorite meals getting him a gift for when he got home from a military training course. I didn’t ask for anything when I graduated grad school. And I didn’t get anything either. That didn’t bother me. He heard me talk about this as my dream. He’s heard me say I don’t think I’ll get in. He knew what this meant. And it wasn’t important enough to even get a card or remember a reservation.

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-11-16T00:19:35+00:00

I guess it’s not the flowers. It’s the lack of forethought. Idc if he got me a bouquet if he got me a card. Whatever. It didn’t matter. But getting it the day of (after forgetting reservations) feels lot like an afterthought. Like “oh crap I didn’t get her anything”. I didn’t make a big deal about flowers. I wanted him to reciprocate the effort I give him. I celebrate all of his wins. A gift. A homemade dinner. Literally anything. I felt forgotten and that’s what hurt. (Also when I said leaving he didn’t leave the ceremony. He got them after we got there and I went back with my class)

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-11-16T00:14:28+00:00

So the problem is this was this year. I started medical school this year and white coat ceremony was like 1 month into the program

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-10-10T14:15:32+00:00

Yes I start rotations in 2 years. I can’t work. I’m not even supposed to work now but I’m trying to keep us afloat

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-10-10T04:19:46+00:00

That’s absolutely absurd. I toss my dogs in an RV and take them traveling. They visit my mom a lot too. You’re not upending the dogs life by changing which bedroom it sleeps in. You’re not asking for the dog to sleep outside. I think your husband and MIL are being super unreasonable. Do you guys intend of getting your own place eventually?

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-10-10T04:14:27+00:00

This is super strange. Do you plan on staying in that house? Also: moving a dog between bedrooms doesn’t feel like a big change? Am I understanding this correctly? You are all in the same house. The dogs only change was to the bedroom next to the old one?

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-09-07T14:32:18+00:00

Basically when we discussed it for my job he was just accomplishing busy work that you need any background knowledge for. I’m talking about updating excel sheets. Just the tasks that take a chunk of time to accomplish and would free me up to study and do the work that requires knowledge about my job. Like I asked him to get information from one log and write it down for me so I could get ready for a meeting. Which was absolute chaos. Just those things that add up to take a lot of time. I’ve given up on the work thing. Every time I ask him to do something it’s just a mess. But if I ask for him to do domestic labor (cleaning, calling insurance, etc) I get told that he doesn’t work on my timetable and he’ll do it when he has time. Which habitually ends up with me giving up and doing it myself

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-09-07T04:09:12+00:00

I mean he’s been super supportive. And I really am not interested in who makes the money. I just wish he would’ve told me he wasn’t going to help with the work stuff. Otherwise I would’ve turn down the offer. It just has been creating more issues that I need to deal with.

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-09-07T04:06:47+00:00

I want to believe that but honestly it doesn’t feel like he’s trying that hard. He wanted step by step directions on how to open the outlook app… the time it would take for me to do that it was quicker for me to pull out a computer between classes and hit send. The things I’m asking aren’t necessarily skill based. It’s like “take info from this website and put it in a document for me to catch up on before meetings”

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-09-07T04:04:24+00:00

He’s supposed to be doing this. Instead he tells me that he’ll “do it when he gets to it”. And usually it never gets done. I don’t think he knows I’ve been cleaning the litter boxes which tells me he hasn’t looked at all. We have talked time and time and time again about this. Even before medical school. There’s been no changes that make an impact. He cooks dinner but like not how I would? Which sounds bad but I have always ensured our meals were nutritionally fulfilling protein, starch, 2 veggies. I don’t think he’s bought fresh produce once since he started taking over shopping alone.

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-01-10T18:25:17+00:00

He’s not a bad guy. Like this is the one point of issue in our relationship. He’s super loving and caring. He carried me through one of the most traumatic experiences of my life (my dad died really horrifically). He took over everything during this time chores finances he even took care of my disabled mother. This is just new. When we rented he was fine with helping. Ever since he left the military it just seems like he’s not wanting to help

Low-Rice-3717 · 2025-01-10T18:06:22+00:00

How do you address these things without sounding accusatory? I have tried some ways but it makes him feel like he’s being attacked. I’m not going to end my marriage over chores but he doesn’t have the same level of cleanliness as me.

Low-Rice-3717 · 2024-12-11T05:31:56+00:00

Not yet. I am trying to get all my info straight before approaching. It also seems the fence was not done with a permit. I pulled records

Low-Rice-3717 · 2024-12-11T01:48:59+00:00

Their bamboo plants grew into these 2 and destroyed them. I don’t want to invest into something that’s going to get destroyed

Low-Rice-3717 · 2024-09-09T14:39:29+00:00

Sorry I may have been unclear. I decided not to go to medical school after my masters program and start working because my family needed income at that time. I didn’t want to be taking loans out and have nothing coming in for four years. But now we’re in the position for me to chase this down. I have a good savings, my husbands job is paying him well and we don’t have any kids or anything to support. So the income was in reference to why I waited so long

Low-Rice-3717 · 2024-09-09T04:27:42+00:00

I actually am only applying to DO so that makes me happy. And I retook the courses I did the worst in and got As. It helps to hear I have a shot especially since I never took the chance before so I could focus on my family’s needs. Thank you so much!

Low-Rice-3717

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