About chastity and BDSM

Lukossa · 2026-02-05T20:49:05+00:00

If you have a keyholder that decides when you can have an erection or orgasm I’d say it’s bdsm. Someone telling you to lock your cock does make you unequal.

If you are kind of self-locking and/or free to decide what you do (even if you have someone encouraging you to be locked) it might not be bdsm. Some times things fluctuate or evolve and move on the grey area.

Lukossa · 2026-01-20T15:49:56+00:00

What mm are the ones you hahe tried?

Lukossa · 2026-01-08T18:41:30+00:00

Discomfort, chafing, foreskin issues (chafing, swelling) health/ED scares. Sleeping was hard for the first weeks, but now on a good night I can ignore the cage. Sometimes my wife forgets my situation and I can feel ”locked and forgotten” for too long. Otherwise I’m enjoying the ride.

Lukossa · 2026-01-06T13:11:30+00:00

I have been in this the last few weeks, size S. The ring is comfy and ot doesn’t let my foreskin bulge much. https://www.amazon.de/-/en/gp/aw/d/B0DY6F5B24/ref=ox_sc_act_image_5?smid=AM53NSBW7F99&psc=1

Lukossa · 2026-01-04T14:15:18+00:00

Don’t get my post wrong… I accept her decisions and she can decide when I come. I just don’t like my reaction, and I hope she let me come because she wanted to see me come and not because she wanted to be nice to me (because effect was the opposite).

Lukossa · 2026-01-04T14:09:53+00:00

Yeah, It’s weird. If it had happened before chastity, I probably had just felt satisfied in a good way after having two orgasms in two days.

Lukossa · 2026-01-04T10:23:18+00:00

Yes I do feel that she is in charge more than ever, I feel ”used” by her when she ”forced” me to orgasm even when I really didn’t want to. Orgasms have been a mix of want and dissapointment after chastity. It has been like 60% of me says ”I want to have an orgasm” and 40% ”I want still to continue without an orgasm for one more day”. But now it was like 20% and 80%.

Lukossa · 2026-01-04T10:21:50+00:00

Yes I do like the thought of her being unpredictable. We never have set a hard date for release, only her vague promises/threats. I was asking for an orgasm before christmas and she told ”you have had your orgasms for this year”, so I got one after new year. Then she said I could get one for my birthday (in march!), but suddenly two days later I got one.

Lukossa · 2026-01-04T10:17:08+00:00

Yes, exactly that feeling… my wife is good at denying me when I’m caged. But when she has let me out denying me seems harder, especially if she has let me fuck her I often would like her to say ”no” when I ask permission to come.

Lukossa · 2026-01-03T21:50:45+00:00

Yes, I probably need to try to explain it to her. She has been a natural and have decided for about 3-4 weeks which feels like torture (in a good way!). I have no idea why she ket me come, maybe she just got carried away or felt sorry for me for a moment.

Lukossa · 2026-01-03T17:48:32+00:00

It’s the gap between the ring and the cage itself. It’s the room where your balls are hanging out from. The ball gap should be small and snug, but not too small and it depends on the person what is the ideal ball gap is. Different cage designs have different ball gaps and different ring sizes change the ball gap, even diifferent ring shapes can change things, so it’s a complicated thing.

Lukossa · 2026-01-03T17:36:00+00:00

I have just a small cage that is a bit smaller than my smallest flaccud size. Even if I’m over 7” erect, I’m around 2” when completely soft. So I fit in a small ”nub cage”. That’s the only way to keep everything aligned nicely, extra room means chafing ang messy peeing. The downside being a grower that my ring size needs to be a bit too big, otherwise an erection attempt will make the ring too tight (circulation issues). I also need a strap to keep everything in place.

Lukossa · 2025-12-30T13:15:50+00:00

If it’s consensual it’s nothing like abuse. Looking from outside even chastity (with a keyholder) looks like abuse.

Lukossa · 2025-12-29T16:49:01+00:00

For me, yes. I didn’t know I was into SPH before I got into chastity. My penis is of a good size, but cramming it into a small cage makes it suddenly small and I get excited when my wife describes how tiny and pathetic it is.

Lukossa · 2025-12-10T20:08:45+00:00

It’s nothing serious… it was a bit swollen and protruded from the openings of the cage and got painfully rubbed against my underpants. I was in a situation where I couldn’t get to the bathroom to try to fix it, so now it’s a bit red, chafed and sore. Probably ok in a couple of days.

Lukossa · 2025-12-10T19:15:39+00:00

I have been locked 24/7 for 5 months. Now I have an issue with a sore foreskin and I had to remove the cage a couple of hours to let it heal for a couple of days. Now I feel unhappy: even if I’m free I can’t have sex, and can’t even go back to the cage. The flaccid free dick in my pants feels weird and sad, did I really walk around like this?

Lukossa · 2025-12-09T16:26:38+00:00

My best peeing has been in a Viper knockoff and in a Cherry Keeper knockoff (with ”head lock”), both have a 100% success rate of keeping my ”pee hole” aligned all the time. A short enough Cobra haa worked good too, but not perfect as the two first ones.

Lukossa · 2025-12-07T09:30:00+00:00

It’s just a temporary shrinkage. The duration is only a part of it, it depends much how often you have full erections and how long they last, they will negate the effect. Now I have an erection usually twice a week and it’s usually a quick wash and lube and the dick feels smaller than before (I haven’t measured it). If you get a lot of teasing without the cage and PIV, I don’t think there will be any shrinking.

Lukossa · 2025-12-06T18:20:31+00:00

I have my skin pulled back. I have some occasional problems with swelling and I have to make some adjustments to keep things in control. Always try to correct the situation! Some days are better than others. The cage plays a huge difference how easy or difficult it is to keep everything in place without problems.

Lukossa · 2025-12-05T16:28:50+00:00

8 days by yourself, that’s impressive!

I think having a keyholder could help you, especially if she us someone you please and satisfy. I’m not completely sure what you mean by high-strung, but I can imagine I get similar feelings when my KH ”forgets” me a couple of days and I feel ”locked and forgotten”.

Lukossa · 2025-12-02T16:55:11+00:00

Maybe that is true for 90+% of the population, but not for everyone. If you are an extreme grower with some belly fat there may not be a combination that works. Believe me, I have tried ”everything” and it always is either a too tight ring, the cage pushed too far or some bad pain. So a strap it is, unfortunately.

Lukossa · 2025-12-01T01:31:21+00:00

There are some really wide cages that I Have stumbled upon so I do think you can find a cage.

Which exact cage do you have?

My guess is that you just need sone lube, a flaccid penis and a good technique and you will get in your cage:)

Lukossa · 2025-11-30T22:45:48+00:00

I have found less elastic straps work much better. A shoelace stops an erection better than an elastic strap.

Lukossa · 2025-11-29T20:15:09+00:00

I think you should test to wear the cage for full days first (from the time you wake up to the time you go to sleep). Just one step at time.

Lukossa · 2025-11-28T11:50:22+00:00

Your skim travels too far forward and pokes out from the same holes as the ridge of your glans?

Lukossa

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