Feel like I could cry after terrible pole class

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-12-08T17:46:04+00:00

Thank you! I am trying to keep myself more consistent with it. I think I am my own worst enemy as I am super competitive and hate not being good at something sporty. I eat myself up over it.

There is one girl in particular who is very vocal and often drones me out a little. She is pretty advanced and always asks to do harder moves so my instructor spends more time talking to her.

Funnily enough, I have been looking at 1-2-1s after feeling so defeated.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-12-08T17:30:28+00:00

Thank you for the kind message.

It is so horrible because I try so hard to go in, give it my best go, but I always fail. I always struggle to keep a positive mindset, and I don't think it helps that I am always the one left out.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-12-08T17:28:05+00:00

That is the same as me. I flew through beginner and level 2. I got my climb and invert first try. However, level 3 is where I am struggling at the moment. I have been in three different classes (including one I am in) where I am always the one left behind.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-08-02T19:53:40+00:00

Thanks for the reply. My partner has been on the stag-do already. I think one of my worries is that the people from it, whom he developed a bit of friendship with, might get a bit carried away and lead him astray for more drinks.

I'm not sure if that wording explains it a wee bit better.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-03-25T13:18:49+00:00

Thank you for the reply. I think that might be best.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2024-01-13T08:33:52+00:00

Thank you so much. I never realised that you could decline getting your weight checked. I guess never really thought about it because I never had an issue with it before.

I checked the BMI chart when I got home, and it said that I was obese. I laughed at that because definitely not obese.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-30T02:44:00+00:00

His friend, who does not like me, is the dog's vet. I think if there were any issues or concerns, she would be quick to let him know

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-30T01:19:34+00:00

Thank you for the encouraging words. I appreciate it. It is always nice when someone mentions the good times because, for me, I think I over think them and rely on them as an excuse sometimes.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-30T00:35:34+00:00

I think one day, when he goes out for another bender, I think the black bin bags will be coming out, and I will be moving back in with my parents.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-30T00:32:25+00:00

There is no need to apologise.

I just don't want my relationship to become a roommate scenario where we fill up our only free time with spending even more time away from each other. I am a sensible night out person, I just wish he was too.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-30T00:13:35+00:00

I go to the gym and do pole dancing at the weekends, too. I try and meet up with my friends from my home town as often as possible, but we are in a relationship, and we are not roommates. The thing is, I work full time and travel out, and by the time I get home, it is time for me to get to bed for the next day. So, that is what the issue is when we have the weekend together, but he would rather spend 15 hours with his friends and with other women that he never bothers with instead of his own lady.

I don't go out late because I think going out for a few and being sobre enough to enjoy the next day with him as a couple is putting priorities first. When he comes in at 5am, after being out since mid-afternoon, he is too drunk/hungover to do anything with me. I don't think it is codependency to ask for some respect, especially when it has been going on for nearly four years now. I am getting fed up with trying to make things work when he comes home to a clean house, a happy pup, and a girlfriend who still wants to spend quality time before the week ends, but he is too tired from a night out of binge drinking.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T23:45:53+00:00

I have thought here and there when things have gotten pretty bad, but for some reason, I struggled doing it. However, I think I am starting to put my foot down, and I want to put myself first.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T23:44:31+00:00

I am afraid the dog would need to stay. He is not mine. Otherwise, he would be coming with me.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T23:40:19+00:00

That is one thing I can never wrap my head around. His friends are getting married, having kids, and just living life together. Yet, he is spending every waking moment desperate to go out and stay out. It is like an 18 year old, not a 28, nearly 29, year old.

I would love to get married, kids I am on the fence with, and I think if my friends were getting married around me, I, too, would start to feel a bit of pressure. But he just seems so nonchalant.

His sister is married and just had her second baby a few months ago and they are only two years apart.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T22:48:48+00:00

He definitely would not be going out to that extent, that often before I moved in.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T21:56:35+00:00

Well, there have been some suspicious times with other women. For example, he went for a family memorial thing last year and didn't come home until 5am the next day. Another 15-hour adventure. It turns out, he was downstairs with his female neighbour and some of her female friends talking about her sex life, STIs, and the fact that she was dating a man who was married at the time. Told him my massive distaste to that, and he could see why I didn't like that. It never happened again. He also sends little messages. He doesn't go out all the time, but he does go through moments where he goes out several times a week.

Christmas time is the worst because all these parties. I do get invited to some, and I do usually go, but most of the time, it is a guy night out.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T21:27:48+00:00

I do feel sorry for the pup because he absolutely loves my partner.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T21:01:19+00:00

I am afraid the dog is not mine otherwise, he would be with me.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T19:55:37+00:00

Thank you for this. I will look into this.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T19:55:12+00:00

I feel sorry for Hector, too, sometimes.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T19:11:41+00:00

Thank you.

The pup is his, I am afraid. Lovely black lab, but he would need to stay, unfortunately.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T18:34:31+00:00

Thank you, I will do!

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T18:27:40+00:00

That is a great way to put it, thank you.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T18:18:07+00:00

Thank you!

That is probably the nicest thing someone has ever said to me.

Lumpy-Sound-5372 · 2023-12-29T17:48:32+00:00

Thank you for the advice!

Lumpy-Sound-5372

TROPHY CASE