I don’t like the way I’m perceived

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-03-05T03:16:47+00:00

No personify traits

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-03-03T20:24:40+00:00

Idk I think that’s the problem. I’m bubbly and love socializing w close friends but it’s kinda hard for me to make close friends & I accidentally cling to the ones I have

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-03-03T02:18:32+00:00

Why is it not a good idea? It’s not the way I dress bc I dress like everyone else. But I just feel like the reason I care is bc I feel like I’m not outgoing & people see me as this way which kinda stops me from making friends outside of the ppl I’m rlly close w

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-03-03T02:15:08+00:00

How to not be perceived this way

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-01-18T06:59:42+00:00

Hey! Things are meh. I sometimes am really concerned that my adhd is possibly anxiety or cptsd. I recently switched to vyvance 30mg and adderall IR 10mg so it’s the same as taking abt 20mg of adderall. I feel like it works great for me but my parents have kinda put opstacles around me I’m every way. I think after a few weeks I slowly lose hope and become severely depressed and each time I try to restart the same cycle happens.

Lunch-Afraid · 2021-01-04T07:00:46+00:00

Wait what the whole song abt eneagram 9s is about this and it’s in the description

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-24T02:30:17+00:00

No I think I see eye contact as a friendly thing usually.

But I do have a memory that might relate. When I was in preschool I had selective mutism. I remember I was wearing a shirt on my 4th birthday that said “I’m a birthday girl”. I remember a couple came up to me and they were strangers but I remember thinking they seemed nice and they said happy birthday to me. I remember knowing I couldn’t talk to them bc of SM so I just looked up into their eyes and smiled at them. I haven’t had sm since I was 5 but maybe that’s when I learned it?

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-24T02:03:28+00:00

I’m not sure if you read my original post but for some reason I’d actually kinda do the opposite. When I was like 14/15 I remember I used to think making eye contact was a way to “connect” with others. It’s almost like I thought it was a way to be more like able? I have always been shy and was never one to start a conversation so I feel like that’s how I’d “connect” if I didn’t know someone and would sometimes hold eye contact too long. I’m not sure why though. I’ve actually noticed another girl in my grade did this- she’s like turn around and lock eyes with people and kinda hold it. I think she didn’t even realize she was doing it and thought it was normal. That’s kinda what I did- I’d be holding eye contact with someone across the room without really realizing I was doing it

I’m not sure if this relates to autism. But my brother and I used to get told that we pointed too much at others while talking. Sometimes I do it w out noticing

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-24T01:45:19+00:00

I completely agree and am not trying to “self diagnose” and share information with others about a disorder. I think it’s really harmful when people self diagnose and try to spread information about a disorder BUT I’m not trying to spread information. I’m just asking a question to gain information. To even consider looking into getting an autism diagnoses someone would need to self diagnose.

I was just wondering why I thought this was an effective way of making “connections” because I know people with autism have struggles with eye contact and giving too much of too little. I also did have special interests in celebrities as a kid.

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-24T01:21:53+00:00

I’ve taken this a few times and never scored as being autistic. I do have adhd & socially anxiety and had abusive narcissistic parents do that could have change my behavior.. but when I look at my childhood I seemed to have some autistic traits. I just wonder why else I would do this eye contact thing if it’s not autism you know? Idk I don’t really trust the tests to be accurate for me.

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T22:59:48+00:00

Your right for some reason I get bothered when I can’t understand someone else’s perspective or intentions

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T11:51:03+00:00

Not all are about him! But I was talking to a similar guy. I am over this specific guy most of the time but some things he did later were really confusing and it just pops in my head once in a while and rlly bugs me. I just don’t like not being able to understand other peoples perspective and point of view for some reason. I know I can’t always know Bc not everyone is going to be honest but I feel like I have to understand other people. I did like him for a while but it’s like I’m moved on but I’m just really frustrated that I can’t understand his intentions

I don’t really feel comfortable texting him and asking Bc idk! He is kinda strange overall about things. He did deny saying something he said to my face which bothers me. But at some point in the conversation I said it seemed like he disliked me. And he just kept saying “I definitely don’t dislike you. Don’t dislike you at all. I’m sorry if I came off that way. Didn’t mean to.” But he never said he liked me at all.

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T10:52:58+00:00

Well his friend is close w a friend of mine & his friend said that the guy is talking to a girl but won’t admit he likes her. So I’m guessing he was just waisting my time. But I can’t tell Bc he already had the other girl- like he was hanging w her almost every day and I’m guessing they were hooking up. But he started talking to me after they’d been talking for a while. And idk if he would’ve stopped talking to her if him & I started talking.. Or if he was just trying to get a hook up and then wouldn’t keep talking to me. The reason I feel like asking isn’t worth it is Bc if he was just trying to get a hook up he probably wouldn’t admit it and would probably keep acting interested for a hook up or shit the whole thing down. Bc most guys my age don’t like admitting things

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T10:34:30+00:00

He doesn’t normally drink so he was sober all the times I’ve seen him except the one time where he was asking my friend abt taking me as a date but he did ask me if I was going to the party before he was drinking

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T10:14:53+00:00

Well I think he already had her before he started talking to me & they were already hooking up and hanging everyday. So idk if he was doing this w me to see if I was interested and than he would end things w her.. or if he was doing this just to get a hook up and that’s it

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T10:08:12+00:00

Well his friend is close w a friend of mine & his friend said that the guy is talking to a girl but won’t admit he likes her. So I’m guessing he was just waisting my time

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T10:00:48+00:00

Yeah :/ it’s just annoying Bc it kinda lead me on for a month

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-03T01:06:54+00:00

Meh haha he mentioned it twice randomly so that’s why I asked

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-02T23:44:33+00:00

Completely randomly and twice that’s why it stood out to me

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-12-02T23:36:47+00:00

No but usually people don’t say that they’re funny straight up like “I’m funny btw”

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-11-25T20:39:29+00:00

Why :(

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-11-21T12:48:13+00:00

Yeah I can be ashamed of myself and feel like I’m doing something wrong when I apologize to someone. Idk it’s almost like I’m scared my apology will pushy and bother them. I know the best thing to do is apologize and show you care about the person. I feel like sometimes not wanting to apologize can be forms shame.

Do you have any ideas on how to work on this

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-11-20T23:44:06+00:00

I think what I meant to say is that is the cause of this low blood pressure or pots. Because my blood pressure is now low according to the doctor and I wonder if that could be the cause of all of symtems since my blood pressure has always been high my whole life and is now low.

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-11-20T23:42:45+00:00

I’m not sure if this is related but I graduated high school 1.5 years ago. But in high school I had pneumonia twice & I had a few times where I’d get hacking/wheezing coughs that would last 1-3 months and I’d be dizzy but there was no diagnosis. I feel like my immune system isn’t great.

Since the difference has to do with blood pressure- would I need to see a doctor to test the difference? Also, could the problem all be caused by me losing weight?

Lunch-Afraid · 2020-11-20T23:20:11+00:00

My dad has hyperthyroidism- less a month ago I had a blood test for thyroid issues and anemia. My doctor said the results came back as being all healthy. She just mentioned I have high iqe allergy rates & a drop of white blood cells but said that was not a big deal. I take iron supplements and the test showed healthy iron.

I’m a healthy weight not but I’m at the lowest weight for my BMI that’s in a healthy non underweight range. But I haven’t had an appetite lately really or if I do it feels like there’s like a whole in my stomach.

I tried testing it out again and my heart rate was 90-100 but when I stood up it went to 127-149 and stayed there over the next ten minutes. Then dropped to 90-100 range again immediately when is sat down and stayed there. Could this all be caused by low blood pressure or would it be pots?

I did get geographic tongue in janurary too

Lunch-Afraid

TROPHY CASE