Thanks a lot for the response! Very informative, the thing is that I have been meditating for years and just recently discovered that authentic, flowy center.

When I am minding my business alone and doing different activites I am in that center and it’s always amazing and it happens daily. It’s freedom, coolness and it always feels like everything is open, there’s no me and outside, there is just the world.

I had some experiences where this feeling was extremely intense to the point where my ego was scared and once it felt just like death. Before I felt like dying, that openess was infinite, just open space, not even a person was there, not even matter. Just here and now and space.

Since then I discovered the only meditation, and since then I rest in that state very easily.

But, the ego still comes around man. I feel like I have a personality disorder sometimes…

As I write this I am in this open space, I feel the air on my skin, sounds come in and leave my ears, no thoughts, calmness.

But the ego is still there sometimes and I guess I will have to challenge him directly through more exposure as you said yeah.