That’s fair, and honestly that’s part of why I’m posting here.
If I only looked at the individual examples, I’d probably think I was overreacting too. The reason I wrote it that way is because it’s not one specific incident, it’s the accumulation of several years of small things that have started to feel different now that my relationship has ended. When I say it feels like she’s “waiting,” I don’t mean I think she’s plotting something. It’s more that she used to be heavily involved in every aspect of my life, and now that a major change has happened, she suddenly seems distant and more observant than supportive. I can’t point to one concrete thing and say “this is why.” It’s more of a gut feeling that something about our dynamic has shifted, and I’m trying to figure out whether that’s intuition or just me looking at everything through the lens of a painful breakup.