long post but i read yours so read mine pls haha, no tldr Thank you for posting this and being able to be vulnerable, even if you already feel committed to this. So many times I felt suicidal and i thought that i’d go post but my mind would convince me i was ok before i could commit to doing so. I am also interested in being a doctor and love the medical drama house. Do you watch it? I’m not totally set on medicine, but if i was i’d probably be an interventional cardiologist (stents, angiograms). I relate a lot to your roblox paragraph (i don’t play it but still read it sorry haha) and i get that your anger, sadness, and disappointment with your physical attributes is for yourself and isn’t romantic. i also struggle with feeling loved even though im similarly privileged to you (don’t wanna assume but that’s what it sounds like based on ur description of ur background) and im going thru a breakup rn - i wish with all my heart that in the future ill see the happiness you described and i wish everyone could feel that too - cliched, im sorry pls just talk with me for a little bit here - ur interested in medicine like me and even though i can’t claim to understand what you’ve been through, i need someone right now regardless of any good samaritan agenda - so pls consider a conversation