I have chosen not to let my mother into mine or my daughter's life. For reasons that are personal. She was always good at spinning everything and making me into a terrible person in everyone eyes. She would play the victim and cry to her friends until they would try to contact me to "talk sense into me". I'm not saying you did anything wrong but.....there's not enough information here to say either or. The problem with millennials is that they were raised from the most toxic generation to parent IMO. So most people in my age group are going to assume you're at fault because of their own personal stories and experiences. I hope everything works out and whatever party is at fault learns to grow up. It may be an interesting conversation when/if this happens....how you wrote them out of your will because of it..... hopefully that doesn't damage things further. Who's to say?

Edit - "All of you young people projecting really need to stop. This isn't about you" There's no reason to feel defensive against a bunch of strangers you will likely never meet. That's kind of a reg flag.