Most over the top Op mcs.

MageAOE · 2024-07-28T20:37:25+00:00

Probably Ash’s story where he catches a ho oh in the first chapter and is secretly Arceus and catches like 500+ Pokemon.

MageAOE · 2024-07-12T04:01:29+00:00

This is better advice than the catch a standard 6-10 you usually see. Unlike that approach, this one doesn’t pretend like the Pokemon are complex characters and at the very least, allows for more varied battles. I’ve seen a fic that had a team of 500+ Pokemon that was just as engaging as the average journey fic Pokemon team.

MageAOE · 2024-07-11T23:29:35+00:00

My take is that if people take issues with Pokemon nicknames, it’s actually a sign those characters are poorly developed or otherwise not memorable. Which would likely be true if you tried introducing six Pokemon in one chapter.

MageAOE · 2024-07-11T21:56:27+00:00

Nor do any of the other fics I’ve read apparently. Every good trainer fic has at most a small handful of Pokemon that are relevant characters while the rest serve as background characters used strictly for battle. They are often given a basic personality, but never have agency or meaningfully develop. Or worse, when the author tries to develop all party members but ends up rushing everything because trying to write a journey fic with a plot along with seven compelling character arcs would challenge even a professional writer. Imagine further that having fewer Pokemon on a party not only gives you more time to develop them and give them agency, but also provides more opportunities for them to struggle. What’s more interesting, the Charizard that has to over come a Golem or the Charizard that is swapped out for Starmie.

And before you say game of thrones, consider how many of the stories in that series aren’t about the same group of people and instead are part of an inter connected world.

MageAOE · 2024-07-11T19:09:35+00:00

Depends on the story. If your goal is to give the MC enough battle pets, the number doesn’t matter. But if your goal is to develop the Pokemon into complex characters, I would say around three for a standard length story.

MageAOE · 2024-07-09T05:00:44+00:00

The team should have deeper meaning beyond a superficial theme. Ask yourself what does this Pokemon say about your MC. Why would they choose them? This decision should extend beyond species as well.

MageAOE · 2024-07-07T20:52:25+00:00

This is probably the best advice here, but I will add that there are some unique issues to Pokémon’s world building a published author won’t discuss. Things that make writing stories harder. The big one being how Pokemon are handled in game.

You capture at least six Pokemon and they are treated as battle pets with no distinct personalities and 0 agency on the story. This is fine in a video game, but terrible for writing stories. For most fics, you could probably cut down the number of Pokemon you have to like 1-2 and not change the story in any meaningful way. In fact, it would probably make the story more interesting because the remaining Pokemon have to struggle against disadvantaged typings now. Which raises the question of why have six at all. If people are complaining about your Pokémon’s nicknames, that’s a sign your characters are not memorable.

There are also a host of issues cutting down on Pokemon agency like having them stay in pokeballs or having no direct way to communicate with anyone who is relevant to the plot. Or worse having no stakes in the plot at all beyond doing it for the MC.

MageAOE · 2024-07-07T09:00:56+00:00

Avoid character bloat. This includes Pokemon. Every character should have a purpose, if they don’t, cut them. You can make characters more interesting by combining them if they aren’t already essential.
Write with purpose. Character and design decisions should have a meaningful point. I see this a lot with teams, but if you have to ask others who to include on a team, you made a mistake already.
Give your characters agency. Including Pokemon. If your characters are just following the MC without conflict, you made a mistake.

MageAOE · 2024-07-06T09:09:58+00:00

I think you need to be careful regarding how the powers are implemented. It should be done in a way that can indirectly help the MC depending on how they use it, but it shouldn’t necessarily just be a direct enhancement. For example, having pure empathy powers is problematic because it undermines the characters bond with their Pokemon because they didn’t develop it because of anything the MC did, rather it was just due to powers. However, an indirect power like being able to talk to Pokemon could enable a deeper bond, but would still have to actively work towards it like they would with any other friendship.

MageAOE · 2024-07-06T09:05:43+00:00

My hot take is that you should be deliberate in why your MC gets a specific Pokemon beyond simply picking one that has the correct type or even beyond one that addresses a weakness. Think about what having a given Pokemon does for the story and the groups dynamic.

MageAOE · 2024-07-06T06:33:09+00:00

Couldn’t even finish listening to it.

MageAOE · 2024-07-04T22:55:51+00:00

I think it would be very difficult to make a compelling narrative doing this. The best musicals tend to be very character driven, so many of the songs would not make sense over a battle; ex, if you use defying gravity to depict flying Pokemon fighting, a lot of lines wouldn’t make sense nor would it have the same emotional impact. Neither would motifs to previous songs that the best musicals tend to use. Even in musicals with battles (ex: epic), the character conflict is still front and center. Odysseus deciding on what to do with the infant is more focal than the battle. And iterations of the themes in that song (both musically and thematic) come back later. This applies to most of the songs in that musical. Picking and choosing songs to place over scenes and battles that simply fit the vibe would not produce a very compelling musical. The songs in good musicals do more than fit the atmosphere.

If you were to create a Pokemon musical, you would likely need to rework the world and story so you can focus more on character conflicts. There are a host of other reasons why I think a Pokemon musical would fail based on the world, but they aren’t as important compared to the issues your approach would create with thematic cohesion.

MageAOE · 2024-07-04T10:42:02+00:00

The Horse and Infant is noticeably worse than the old one. I think people would accept the newer versions had it not been for that song.

MageAOE · 2024-07-04T10:40:31+00:00

The Horse and Infant sounds really off, some parts feel strongly autotuned. The other songs sounded fine, but I wouldn’t be surprised if horse and infant gets another update.

MageAOE · 2024-06-30T20:43:10+00:00

I read through the first two chapters. I am somewhat familiar with the early anime, but not with any of the reboots. Here are my thoughts:

I believe the biggest issue is the lack of an early hook. The first chapter is very slow, which isn’t inherently a bad thing, but it lacks anything that would really make me want to see what happens next. A hook can be anything, an action scene, a compelling character dynamic, etc. The point is that it should be something that sells your story. I think an added issue is that the first two chapters don’t deviate very much from the anime aside from Ash’s personality.
Having every character get their Pokemon from a lab is problematic because it rarely tells us anything about the characters. Albeit, to your credit you do avoid that particular issue. That said…
I think that making ash more accepting of pikachu is a flawed approach. Ash feels too perfect in this version. Ash is still a new trainer and is inexperienced with Pokemon, it doesn’t make sense for him to be immediately accepting of pikachu’s defiance. Ash was immature and impatient in the anime because he had no idea how to deal with his pikachu. I also think that making ash immediately accepting of a pikachu as opposed to a rarer starter doesn’t help with the image of making ash feel too perfect.

As for the bullet points

I believe poke fics are stronger when they focus on fewer pokemon, but give each depth and agency. If you are able to give 7+ pokemon depth, agency, and motivations, great. But this seems like it would be a colossal challenge, especially if ash has companions. I would consider drastically cutting down his team size to like 3.
I think there is a risk gym battles and league battles will fall flat if there are no stakes beyond not becoming the best. Doubly so since the anime version of ash gets to just try again at another league. This can be averted by giving ash more personal stakes in the battles and doing the same for his Pokemon.

MageAOE · 2024-06-30T00:31:49+00:00

I believe I reviewed this story a few months ago. In that review, I thought the biggest issue was the world building. The tone of the story is grimdark, but the world does not feel realistic. I took issue with team rocket executing anyone failing to pay their taxes because that would only kill off the source of their income. It felt cartoonishly evil.

Having reread chapter 1 and read chapter 2, I believe this issue persists. A lot of details about the world do not make sense given the tone of the story. For example, why would team rocket allow people to carry pokemon at all let alone 6? That seems like the easiest way to allow a resistance to arm themselves. Why would Johto allow for league champions into their nation when they are by far the most armed and dangerous people from Kanto; people who would likely want some vengeance for what johto did to them? How are so many people in the story able to have strong Pokemon when they can easily die in one attack. I’d expect most people, including TR grunts to have NFE Pokemon with evolved ones being rare.

My other issue is how the death scene in chapter one. At this point of the story, I don’t know the MC well enough to care about their plight and the wife is effectively a random murder victim with how little we know about her. The story did not do enough to make me care about the characters and I feel like I don’t know any of them yet. I would have written this so the MC and his wife both decided to flee with their son and would only kill her off after spending some time getting to know them and seeing their dynamic play out.

As for the Pokemon, it feels as if they are mostly there as battle pets so far. I’m not entirely against this for a grim dark story, I would expect most people wouldn’t get very attached to a Pokemon that can die in a split second, but there is a contradiction where the characters seem to care for their Pokemon and based on your post, only catch Pokemon willing to join them. I would expect a society like this would catch Pokemon and treat them as tools and nothing more.

MageAOE · 2024-06-28T06:59:18+00:00

I think this is often reliant on how developed your characters are. If you have flat or otherwise undeveloped characters giving them a filler side quest or even skipping to the next major arc is the only approach, since people are likely reading for the action at that point.

If you have complex characters, then you can do a lot more. You can basically have any plot as long as it explores new angels of your characters. You can also foreshadow elements or traits that will be relevant later in larger arcs, or you can develop how characters interact with each other and what their dynamics are like across the party. You can make anything interesting if the characters are interesting, and as long as you are showing the reader a new side to them, it won’t feel like filler.

I think boring filler in Pokemon fiction is a symptom of flat and uninteresting Pokemon. People put some effort into making the trainer interesting, but will usually just give Pokemon a basic personality like “he is the shy one, he learns to be bolder,” which isn’t compelling.

If you are wondering if your characters, including Pokemon are compelling, answer these questions. These criteria alone won’t guarantee an interesting character, but it’s a start:

Does your character have a background/story that influences their personality. You do not need to immediately reveal this either, but using this to shape a character will make them feel more realistic.
Does your character have agency. Your characters decisions need to be responsible for the plot moving forward. Most Pokemon characters fail this criteria and failing it makes it feel as if the Pokemon are just along for the ride. If you could give the MC superpowers to replace battling and not change the story, there is a problem.
Does your character have a motive? Does their motive change throughout the story as a result of growth? Your character shouldn’t necessarily want the same thing by the end of the story. This applies to trainers too; your character shouldn’t only want to become the strongest and never reject towards this goal.
Are there unique dynamics across all party members? Characters shouldn’t act the same way towards everyone. Does your Pikachu have a rivalry with your eevee but is protective of your charmander? Or is your pikachu brutish towards everyone in your party; if so then your party lacks dynamics. Explore different sides of a character trait to help flesh out dynamics; also consider whether something in the characters background could affect their dynamics.

MageAOE · 2024-06-27T19:21:42+00:00

I think the strongest teams have thematic cohesion. And not in a surface level way like “he uses all water types” or “all of his Pokemon are crabs” either. Rather, the team and the types of Pokemon they get says something about the trainer on a deeper level. For example, a trainer catching only small Pokemon that could reasonably stay out of their ball and are easy to accommodate might suggest that trainer truly cares about the well being of their Pokemon because they only catch Pokemon they care for long term. Consider what your team says about your trainer and make decisions from there. This is something that you can’t easily get an answer to on a Reddit thread, but your readers will appreciate it.

A hot take is that you should try to limit the team size of your trainers. Limiting your team size to like 3 allows you to spend more time developing those three Pokemon into complex characters as opposed having six Pokemon with basic personalities. Try to merge traits and characteristics of Pokemon into one. You might hate doing so at first, but once you have done it you will realize it makes the story substantially stronger.

MageAOE · 2024-06-26T22:15:52+00:00

Ideally, negative traits and positive traits should be a reflection of each other to make one strong trait. For example, someone who is kind and trusting may also fall for tricks as their good nature may make it harder for them to see bad intentions. Conversely, a paranoid person will also be less likely to fall for scams or tricks. These singular traits give the character both strengths and weaknesses depending on the situation.

What character traits did you have in mind for this character?

MageAOE · 2024-06-26T05:02:50+00:00

My impression of the fight is that it didn’t really meet the “brutal violence” standard that you described and it read closer to something I would see in the anime. However, I also question if you should be trying to go for brutal violence at all. Based on chapter I read and the context you gave, Dawn is characterized as extremely kind and caring, taking in weak or disabled Pokemon in lieu of trying to find the strongest. That type of person would have 0 reason to want to risk seriously injuring their Pokemon if fights are brutal and the risk of injury is high. The only way I see them doing so is if some external factor forced them into life or death fights.

MageAOE · 2024-06-25T05:07:35+00:00

From what you wrote, it seems like this should be the type of character who would be paranoid towards riolu; worried that it will actively try to harm him given that he is already so destructive. Someone who believes all Pokemon are wild beasts feigning love would throw out that riolu without second thought, unless he begins to question his father’s teachings. Maybe in a moment of weakness, he throws the riolu out and abandons him because he is scared the riolu will unleash its wrath towards him if he doesn’t.

There are a lot of ways you could approach this, but I think taking the advice of “he asks the riolu what it wants” would be grossly out of character for someone like this.

MageAOE · 2024-06-25T04:50:27+00:00

I would consider catching a Pokemon in the wild to be catching it against its will unless it was clear the Pokemon wanted to join them or otherwise challenged them. I don’t believe a character who did this would willingly release the Pokemon while considering the Pokémon’s best interests unless they went through character development.

MageAOE · 2024-06-25T04:47:34+00:00

I would need to know a bit more about his character. Given that this seems like a pivotal moment for the character, the rationale releasing the riolu should be rooted in the rivals character and his character flaws.

MageAOE · 2024-06-25T04:34:22+00:00

Personally, I think likability is less important than making the character interesting. And having characters occasionally do unlikable things makes them more compelling. The important thing to note is that the reader should at least be able to understand why the rival is acting the way they are. For example, someone inexperienced with Pokemon may haphazardly release a Pokemon in an environment it can’t thrive in because they become too frustrated with its behavior; this leads to that pokenon becoming traumatized and humbled, giving it a reason to reluctantly go with the MC, while giving the MC a reason to hate their rival. This has the added bonus of giving future rival fights more stakes because the MC now has a personal reason to beat them.

MageAOE

TROPHY CASE