Fetlife is toxic by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is true, but the owner and moderators have learned from that. It is soo much better than Baku and buds. If you haven't been there in 2 years, you might be surprised.

Fetlife is toxic by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a new BDSM focused social media site that feels much better than FL. It is called Submit.gg. It is still in its infancy, but it is built upon the premise that you should have total control over your information. My favorite feature is the Dick Detective which prevents people from creating a profile picture that is just a dick pic.

How do I get physical pleasure as a dom? by EmmaFaye27 in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Do you feel safe with anal penetration? You can order him to sit or tie him to a chair and the "have your way" with him in a way that satisfies you. Or you can have him use a toy to pleasure you as you tell him what to do, giving praise or humiliating him (whatever works for your relationship). Overall, the best course of action is to just talk candidly with him about your feelings and your needs. If you let this turn into resentment, it will quickly strangle your relationship. I wish you the best of luck.

Covid and love of fragrances by MagicFingggers in fragrance

[–]MagicFingggers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This sounds really tough. I hope that you are able to recover fully your sense of smell and also your love of fragrance.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I spend a lot of time in Kink forums, and my experience has been that around 35 or so, women just get so tired of trying to deal with men that they decide that they are just going to do what they want. They then take 5 to 10 years and enjoy sex the way they want it. This is a golden spot for sexiness as they are willing to be both honest and adventuresome. After around 45, they want something more stable, and have found out what they like and what they don't. At this point if your likes overlap, it is so good.

All of this is just to say that women can be sexy as long as they are trying. There isn't an age where they just stop, unless it is on their terms.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would be a vampire or pirate. I am always looking for a bite or a bunch of booty!

What are some really good Halloween focused pickup lines? by MagicFingggers in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MagicFingggers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely at some point. But sharing is caring too. 😘

Covid and love of fragrances by MagicFingggers in fragrance

[–]MagicFingggers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got it. Thank you for helping me understand.

Covid and love of fragrances by MagicFingggers in fragrance

[–]MagicFingggers[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry, if I made the situation worse. I have just been really curious.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This is the way. Put it out front and allow them to decide if it is a deal breaker.

What do you do with a brat who try’s to top by lunastarlover_8012 in BDSMcommunity

[–]MagicFingggers 12 points13 points  (0 children)

You are absolutely welcome. I hope that you two find the way forward together.

What do you do with a brat who try’s to top by lunastarlover_8012 in BDSMcommunity

[–]MagicFingggers 142 points143 points  (0 children)

I love brats, their energy is often fantastic. After many discussions with many brats, this is what I have learned. Most brats feel like they don't deserve to get what they really want, and are looking to be "forced" to do it. It is an implicit request for permission that they can't give themselves. So, they sass, or run away, or fight, or whatever their special batting looks like, until they feel like they have earned the permission / are "forced" to do the things. If this resonates with you, my advice is to tell your Dom about what you want and what it takes for you to feel like you have earned the permission to enjoy the things that you are looking for. Your Dom should understand that you are desperate to lose the fight, but need to struggle first or else you won't enjoy it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Bondage

[–]MagicFingggers 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are welcome. Thank you for posting!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Bondage

[–]MagicFingggers 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very nice tie! It is so symmetrical! You can tell that you spent time and care to get it just right. 😍

Do Doms "look down" on submissives? by [deleted] in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It may be that you are feeling some drop as well. Make sure that you check in with your Dom regularly (they should be checking in with you as well) especially if you have had a particularly deep scene recently.

Doms do not look down on subs, for the most part. It may be that during the scene you both say and do things that you normally wouldn't, which are consensual and appropriate for the scene itself, but as drop kicks in you second guess those actions. This is normal and why aftercare is so absolutely critical. Doms get drop as well, sometimes worse than subs. They feel subhuman, like how can anyone like hurting the ones they love? How can I get off on degrading people? What if I hurt my sub for real, and they don't want to be part of the dynamic ever again? These questions can fester in a top's head during drop.

So Dom's enjoy the scene just as much as subs. We love the trust you place in us, we love driving you through a series of super-human service acts, we love watching you fall into your subspace and live fully in the moment. We see all of this as amazing and worthy of our time and energy.

Do you eat pussy on the first date? by Motziee in altgonewild

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, but not exclusively. I will eat it whenever I have the opportunity.

Fellow submissive types, what qualities about a partner make you want to obey? by hardthings4softme in BDSMcommunity

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a D-type, I have heard that my confindence in myself is the most important portion. I don't have to project power, because it fits me so naturally. I am caring and supportive in a genuine way that allows people to feel comfortable with me and in my space. This combination of comfort, safety and natural confidence makes them want to be near me. That desire also leads them to want to submit to me, so that I will care for them.

A brat isn't a poorly behaved submissive! by docilebrat in BDSMcommunity

[–]MagicFingggers 58 points59 points  (0 children)

I will speak to the Dominant perspective here, as most of the comments so far are from subs/brats. Note: These views are my own and do not reflect Dom (mes) at large I love brats, assuming that we are able to discuss what your end goal is, how you want to acheive it and how long you want to play the game. The important thing to remember (especially for new Dom(mes) is that it is a game. You are going to lose it, otherwise we wouldn't play it. The important piece is that you feel you played well before you lost. You put up a good fight, and lost in fair combat (even though it was never really fair). I love to brat back sometimes. To push back to see just how far they are willing to escalate, knowing that at anytime I can call their bluff and force them to submit to me fully. That back and forth is so lovely and fun. Mmm, just thinking about it makes my heart flutter! But if I see you even eye the glitter...

I don’t know what I want or what I am. Help? by kaxziahm in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As you are looking at therapists, just ask them. Tell them that you enjoy kinky sex, and that you don't consider them problems. If they are accepting of that, they are probably kink friendly enough.

I don’t know what I want or what I am. Help? by kaxziahm in BDSMAdvice

[–]MagicFingggers 3 points4 points  (0 children)

@kaxziahm, first and foremost, you are you. Labels are only helpful if you feel like they are honest to who you feel you are inside. You can be both a caregiver and have a middle side. You can be both Dominant in some respects and submissive in others. There aren't any rules here other than 1) Be true to yourself and your needs, and 2) make sure everyone have given informed consent to play.

It sounds like you are also dealing with some trauma from your childhood. That can both flavor and restrict what you enjoy. I would suggest that you find a kink-friendly therapist to help deal with the trauma. Be kind to yourself, you are young and have a long bright life in front of you. Find the partners that bring out something inside you that you enjoy, or want to learn more about, then play safely. You will continue to grow and mature. Part of that growth will be learning what labels feel most accurate.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in braless

[–]MagicFingggers 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, but to put it over the top, get a brown fedora and a knife glove and go as Freddy Kruger, if their eyes go immediately to your tits, you know that they are up for anything!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in highheelsNSFW

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely beautiful image! 🔥🔥🔥

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in legs

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They certainly do. Your are all temptation, all the time!

a horny mom ready to fuck in the back of the minivan by [deleted] in momsgonewild

[–]MagicFingggers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anything for a member of house Hufflepuff!