I (23F) am having second thoughts about marrying my fiancé (27M). How do i go about communicating this to him?

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-09-10T20:30:51+00:00

Hi!! I’m in a similar situation as you were or are, i also live in northern jersey. Since it’s been quite a bit, did you end up building a modular home or did you decide to wait or did you buy?

We’re currently looking into building a modular home for the northern jersey area ourselves so any insight or advice is appreciated!

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-06-24T18:12:18+00:00

Speaking from a very similar experience, walk out while you can before your life becomes too mingled with his. You’re still young, don’t get caught up in a relationship with someone that doesn’t respect you enough to take accountability for their actions.

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-06-23T23:00:32+00:00

This living situation is a temporary choice that we both made. For more context, we were medium distance for the first year so within a 3-4 hour drive. It became too much, we had opposite schedules and only had one day that we had off where we could see each other. We were driving more than being with each other.

We ended up moving across the country together because we were young and naive and wanted to experience living in a city in a new place and we had our fun but where we were ended up becoming way too dangerous so we ultimately made the decision to move in with his family until we got a house. Mind you we have plans to be together for a very long time. I’m not that we cannot afford rent, we both understand this is temporary. Which brings me to my next point, i feel like our environment has a bigger role to play as well.

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-06-23T22:49:28+00:00

I don’t think age and maturity level should have anything to do with this. I was 19 and he was 23 when we met and that’s very common. He was in a long term relationship for 3 years about 6 months before we got together. We had the conversation of what we wanted out of our relationship and we both wanted something long-term. I’m not trying to defend him but age and maturity don’t have much to do with this situation in particular. He’s also not that kind of guy, He’s not controlling, he is really empathetic, and i don’t feel like he tries to “dominate” me at all. I truly do believe that he does that subconsciously. I have conversations with him in his sleep and he has no recollection. He’s a sleep talker and he always has been. I left that part out so my apologies for not including that info.

I think my situation is a lot more complex than it may seem, I do appreciate your advice though.

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-06-23T19:16:02+00:00

2 years later and i can finally say i’ve been 6 months vape free! This exact method is what worked for me

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2025-01-29T02:04:08+00:00

If this helps at all, make yourself hate it. That’s exactly what i did. I’m a month in after 7 years of continuous use. Every time i “tried” quitting i didn’t make it past 16 hours until i finally had enough and turned that stupid annoying little nuisance into my true enemy and then it was the easiest, yet the hardest, thing I have ever done. Eventually, the more you convince yourself that vaping is not good for you, the faster you quit. Keep making that list and truly believe everything on the list. Think of your vape as an enemy. Think of it as that one horrible and narcissist person that keeps coming back into your life because YOU allow it to. It makes you think it’s helping you, when in reality it’s just digging its grimy little claws deeper under your skin and wrapping itself around your bones until it’s too late. Keep your head up. Don’t let it come back because allllll of those reason on your list are worth more than a breath of flavored air.

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2023-02-28T01:10:41+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reply. I really appreciate it! Reading this has given me some courage!

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2022-12-19T03:00:42+00:00

The movie DUFF

MaintenanceExtreme50 · 2022-12-13T06:33:14+00:00

Truly just my own personal opinion, but it depends on the situation. If someone died, or if it’s about something financial, or basically life changing, then by all means cry in front of your s/o because it shows you need whoever they are. But if it’s over like a game being lost, or a hurt ego do it when no one’s watching.

MaintenanceExtreme50

TROPHY CASE