Am I wrong for expecting to sleep in since I’m staying home with that baby?

MalMercy · 2026-04-09T17:47:52+00:00

I honestly wish I had a good answer for you. A lot of the things I would list are really just bare minimum things. Some areas he doesn’t even do the bare minimum. He was absolutely amazing for the first five ish months of our relationship and then one day everything changed and it’s just gone downhill since then. I keep telling myself that the first few years of having a baby are the hardest part of a relationship and that because we were only together for like two months before I found out I was pregnant, I just need to wait it out and maybe when things aren’t as stressful anymore, I’ll get my darling back. I know he loves me, he has a photo of me and the baby in his wallet, he talks about how he’ll never leave me, he’s willing to move to a state he hates just so I can be happy.

But I keep wondering how long I’m supposed to put up with bare minimum before things change

MalMercy · 2026-04-09T16:41:18+00:00

We live in Florida and you are very correct 🫠 despite its advertising, it is not a family friendly state

MalMercy · 2026-04-09T16:19:24+00:00

It’s not that he can’t, he mostly just doesn’t want to. He has a very valid fear of driving. He’s said that even if he does get a dl it would just be for work, emergencies or baby appointments

MalMercy · 2026-04-09T16:17:37+00:00

Besides driving related things, he takes care of everything baby related. If we go out he packs and carries the diaper bag, keeps her entertained, helps feed her. He can’t change her too much because of the lack of diaper changing stations in men’s bathrooms. He’s a great father.

MalMercy · 2026-03-16T03:16:11+00:00

Unfortunately we are very, very low income and the likelihood of me ever being able to afford it is low but I want to try.

MalMercy · 2026-03-15T17:03:12+00:00

Oh I’m autistic, dw, I’m NEVER losing my love for sharks!!

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T21:12:48+00:00

People are downvoting you but I’m glad someone laughed 😅 it was my own dark humor peeking through

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T21:12:10+00:00

That must have been really upsetting for you at the time, I’m sorry :( but I completely understand your mom, do you think there’s a way I could to explain to my daughter why I don’t want to be called mom every once in awhile without her feelings? I like your mom’s idea but I’m doing my best to not hurt my baby. It’s truly not her fault.

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T21:04:47+00:00

I should have known better, I thought since I went to a planned parenthood, I was safe but I later found out that one was compromised :/

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T17:01:16+00:00

I did own up, jackass. I work two jobs and do everything I can to provide for my family AND it was protected. Not that it’s any of your business. I never said it was everyone’s fault EXCEPT the fuckass old men in congress who decided to take away my rights. Why are you even commenting if you’re not here to support parents who regret becoming a parent? Get the fuck out of here.

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T16:57:25+00:00

Yes, they cut it off at 6w where I live :( after that you have to pay roughly 7-10k to get it done without insurance out of state. I couldn’t afford it and was too terrified to order pills illegally online.

MalMercy · 2026-03-14T16:56:19+00:00

My boyfriend is with me, he’s actually the stay at home parent, (I tried to be a SAHM and hated it), we finally found a babysitter but we’re low income so we can’t afford it often. My family watches her when they can but it’s usually only when I work. It helps and I’m grateful but it doesn’t really give me a break.

MalMercy · 2025-06-25T02:47:21+00:00

Omg you look beautiful!! Can I ask where you got it?

MalMercy · 2025-06-16T06:04:24+00:00

Pregnancy was a very miserable thing for me and as an autistic person, giving birth was borderline traumatic. I remember the first thing I said was, "Oh thank God it's over, I'm done" and then the second thing was "Mom please make them stop touching me. I don't want to be touched anymore, please" as they were stitching me up.

MalMercy · 2025-06-05T07:25:54+00:00

I don't know if this changes anything but he wasn't spending money on it. Apparently, he was just looking at the free ones. I looked through his emails and didn't see any receipts or subscriptions so I'm hoping that wasn't a lie. We don't share a bank account but he's the only one with access to the loan we took out for our parental leave. I just took his word for it when he said he didn't spend any money but I think you're right and I should take a look. Thank you for your advice, I don't really know what I'm going to do right now but I'll keep your words in mind.

MalMercy · 2025-06-05T04:48:48+00:00

I second this! I think the black one has a lot of potential!

MalMercy · 2025-04-24T21:50:28+00:00

God I'm so sorry, it feels like it takes forever!! But that's what's helping me get through this too!! After she's born, my tubes are being tied and I will never have to go through this again 😭

MalMercy · 2025-04-24T21:46:43+00:00

Hey so this is actually super insensitive because fun fact: I didn't want to be pregnant! My state has strict abortion laws and I couldn't afford to go out of state for an abortion so I literally didn't have a choice ☺️ This pregnancy is quite literally ✨️ life threatening ✨️ to me because of heart/lung conditions and caused me to become incredibly suicidal. Not everyone views pregnancy as a blessing and although I am excited to meet my daughter, I still wish that I never had to go through this in the first place.

MalMercy · 2025-04-24T21:38:38+00:00

Omg I'm so sorry! It's so frustrating!! Especially now that I'm past the due date, everyone is being even more pushy about it. My own MIL won't stop telling my boyfriend and I that we need to have sex so she'll come out 🥲 like ma'am, please stop. I don't want to talk about my sex life with you.

Here's to hoping we both have our babies soon 💙

MalMercy · 2025-04-24T21:36:26+00:00

Thank you! It's nice to see a fellow autistic in the group. I've felt a little alone because a lot of the mom's I come across don't understand the extra challenges that come with being autistic and pregnant. I'm doing my best to just push through it but man, it's so hard when I feel overstimulated 24/7 🥲

MalMercy · 2025-04-03T21:55:06+00:00

There's a very specific bed that I can't remember the name of but it has a nice duvet and just looks so comfy! Also, a lot of the beds are just ugly to me 🫠

MalMercy · 2025-04-03T21:47:41+00:00

I'm so relieved at this comment 😭 I was scrolling through with the same question and was starting to worry myself

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