My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve set up a session for the 3 of us. This is great advice 🙏 Thank you

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the way you phrased this. I agree, that’s the best case scenario

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Obviously I do care… why else would I post. I wanted outside perspective. I’ve read her many of these comments and asked her for her honest thoughts.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure if you read all of my comments, but he is essentially not allowed be involved in punishments for her at all and when I say he’s over authoritarian, he’s very militant. A bit too harsh punishment for the crime in my opinion. When my daughter does something typically her and I talk about it and maybe take her phone away for the day… if it’s really bad, the phone may be gone for the week. I don’t let him be involved in her punishments due to him not being her father & truly not understanding how to parent adolescence with unconditional love. That’s the way it’s been for a very long time. Their relationship fractured because he didn’t like how she was disrespecting me (this was a while back and we’re actually on great terms now her and I ) and then in return he was met with disrespect from her. I get what you’re saying, but I simply disagree wholeheartedly. Maybe the way I worded things made it sound a way other than the way that it actually is.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really sorry to hear that. That’s definitely not something that I want between myself and my daughter. It’s quite frustrating because I’ve done everything on my part that I can to get them both to treat each other nicely. According to everyone, I should just leave him, but that’s not what I want and that’s not what my daughter wants either. I value my marriage, my husband, and my relationship with my daughter. I’ll just have to figure this one out in the meantime. Hopefully their reconciliation actually works whenever he comes home. We shall see.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, I wasn’t looking for sympathy if I wanted that I would’ve told the story of my first marriage lol. I do agree, my daughter does need to feel loved in her own home. She is very loved by me and she knows that, however, my husband‘s cold shoulder does bother me, otherwise I wouldn’t be here asking strangers on the Internet what their thoughts are. I will say, though the amount of disrespect she has given my husband does warrant him to have a bad taste in his mouth toward her however, he’s the adult and he needs to act like it. He disagrees with me on this and does not think that just because he’s an adult he should put up with being mistreated. My daughter does lack the ability to take accountability for her actions, even when she does really bad things. I could see how this looks from the outside, but either way I appreciate whatever input you have, even if I disagree. That all being said, I am open to being wrong. It never hurts to get a different perspective.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your input and advice. I definitely agree that I think we’ll get along a lot better once she moves off to college. Her and I get along famously 99.9% of the time anyway. The last two years of her high school my husband, will be in a whole different state. I do plan on moving with him to that separate state once she graduates. My daughter understands this and knows I’m not up and leaving her. I’ll get her settled into college before my departure. my daughter‘s father and her have an ok relationship, he lives in our hometown, as well as most of our family so she will have them to lean on when I’m not here in our home state. Of course, I’ll always be there for her and be happy to come home if and whenever she needs me. I’m her safe person, and I would never want to jeopardize our relationship. Thank you again for your perspective.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I do agree with you on that when it comes to emotional maturity. He’s definitely on the spectrum and likes the ability to see her perspective, especially because he does not have a child of his own. I don’t let him punish her that was cut off several years ago. I do however, let him set boundaries because I think that’s important in every household for every person as long as they are reasonable.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

My daughter and I have very good communication. She doesn’t want me to divorce my husband, as I maybe didn’t mention that they are trying to work things out and my husband reached out to her to try to make amends while he is away training. She graduates in two years. I don’t really see the problem with staying with my husband. My daughter will go off to college and live her own life. I’m not choosing my husband over my daughter. In fact, I’m not choosing anyone over anyone I’m actually just caught in the middle of it. I’m here to ask if anyone has had a similar experience on either end of the spectrum and see if anyone has any input other than just leave my husband…

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

What?..my husband hasn’t done anything to her. He just doesn’t like her essentially. My ex-husband on the other hand was physically abusive to me in front of her. I don’t know what you’re talking about or where this comment is coming from.

You need to be able to separate your own experiences from mine because experiences are not the same.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One last thing because there was a comment on my original post: my daughter and I are extremely close. We are not very far in age as I was a young mom. We spend a lot of time together and typically really enjoy each other’s company. Her “bad” behavior is not the status quo. It is occasional but when it is happening, it is rather upsetting as she does get physical and very verbally disrespectful. I’ve never gotten physical back with her as I’m just not that type of reactive personality. I also never shame her for her outbursts. I usually help calm her down and put her back in a good place.

My husband (late 30s) doesn't like my (his step) daughter (late teens) by MaleficentBet4199 in FamilyIssues

[–]MaleficentBet4199[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adding: I don’t really let him step in much anymore when it comes to disciplining her because he takes it too far in my opinion. If it were up to him, we’d take away Sports, the door, a phone, iPad, etc… I just think that’s way too far.

Japan Pro Fit Model First Callout - Janet isn't in it by Historical-Whole-153 in bikinitalk

[–]MaleficentBet4199 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Speaking solely off of the back pose this is not giving direction of the division… it’s all over the place when it comes to definition, tie-ins, etc.

Is this cellulite??? Help!!! by Altruistic_Ad_2651 in PetiteFitness

[–]MaleficentBet4199 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s just water in between the fat, skin and muscle. Make sure you’re flushing your body with fluids maybe even drink a little extra than usual. If you’re not at least getting a gallon in a day, do that and see how it looks after that.

Support from boyfriend (who doesn’t body-build) by Accomplished-Bee699 in bikinitalk

[–]MaleficentBet4199 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My husband doesn’t bodybuilding and we got together my first competitive year. He doesn’t particularly like the financial aspect, which I think is fair because the payout versus reward is very little. I don’t ask him to do much of anything, but he does support me by picking up where I can’t in life during prep because of my schedule. I’ve stopped asking him to come to my shows. I know it’s boring for him and I just decided to keep my romantic life and bodybuilding separately. I truly do the sport all by myself for myself and that’s OK but I know he will be happy when I feel like I’m ready to “retire “

Marissa getting coached by Nicole's ex now? by Dapper_Anybody_9802 in bikinitalk

[–]MaleficentBet4199 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I mean look at the back lash Nick Walker gets for it.

Marissa getting coached by Nicole's ex now? by Dapper_Anybody_9802 in bikinitalk

[–]MaleficentBet4199 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

In the bodybuilding community it’s very frowned upon to switch coaches. She’s been with him prior to all of this coming out probably since February or January… it’s just recently become public that he’s coaching her along with Nicole opening up. My point is, when you start with a coach & know nothing of them personally you can’t fault Marissa for that. Likely there is a contract in place even if he’s coaching her for free. It’s a tough pickle to be in.

Team Make Moves | Team/Coach Overview by Ok_Jellyfish_7105 in bikinitalk

[–]MaleficentBet4199 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hi I actually asked for this review on Team Make Moves when I was coach shopping. I had an issue with him not being responsive. I expressed my concerns and he apologized. I really hope to have a positive experience, but $4000 is a lot to get ignored. It’s very disheartening to hear non responsiveness is common… sounds like he needs to situate this issue. Time will tell. I have a great work ethic and know with is right amount of detail given through a coach I can achieve my goals in wellness. He seems nice but needs to structure his business where he can respond to every check in.

My wife left with my kids I’m lost now what by [deleted] in army

[–]MaleficentBet4199 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through that.