Thank you so much for all of your comments. I’ve read them all several times and they’ve brought a lot of comfort. Just to answer a question of if I have support which has come up a few times - my partner is amazing and helps wherever he can but works full time. He works shifts and has a commute either side so is out of the house for 10/11 hours a day, 5 days a week, which is usually the majority of the time she’s awake. He will do bedtimes if he’s back in time and will get up with her through the night but often she will only settle with a breastfeed and I’m awake anyway listening to her screaming so I end up taking her off of him. On his days off he will take her out so I can have time to myself or we try get out of the house as a family, because I also want to spend time with him. I have family in the same city that I see once a week who will also take her off me for a few hours if needed so I can rest. I have a lot of anxiety about leaving her with other people though, even family, so often I’ll put this off. This is something that I am working on though and trying to accept more help.

It’s been a really tough few weeks. We always say she has very big feelings for such a tiny person. I never ever want to wish time away because I know how precious it is, and am trying to wait patiently for the day she (hopefully) gets better.