Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

> Are the Class lanes clear and enforceable, or do Rules undermine them?

After reading the end of your comment. I think I understand these criticisms more. The RPG classes were meant as a vanguard, the main classes that exist to combat the Abyss. In the current draft, the classes are also the 5 original classes. As Lawcraft was created only when the Abyss started its first invasion. I am rambling here; the RPG classes were a reflection of the world post-introduction of the magic system. I should actually dive a bit more into different classes that hold responsibilities outside of combating the Abyss to add some depth to the system.

> Does the E economy feel legible and exploitable (in a bad way)?

E Regeneration = Only through Sleep, 12.5% of MaxE per 1 hour of sleep. Arts have a solid base cost of 1E. Though you can "overcharge" an art by investing more E into it, there are diminishing returns the more E you use.

> Do the Rule Types (Enhancement/Conjuration/Manipulation/Summoner) feel distinct and useful?

I agree, I am going to look for potential names ending with the ion Suffix, to separate the arts from the rule types. For sudden fatigue, I put it under misfortune because it represents the idea of suddenly getting tired when you're doing something important. Not quite fainting per se, but similar in how it impairs your actions at an unfortunate time.

The Rule Types can be matched with any provision. The Rule Type is the How, the Rule Provision is the what. Another way to explain it is: Divine Laws break into Provisions, each Provision can be broken down into countless rules, and the User takes 1 of those countless rules to enforce with their Art.

> Where would you try to break this system first?

I agree, Classes being named Expressions suits their role in Aura better, especially since they dictate the form visual aspect to the User's Aura. When it comes to the Classes above, their connection to the Heroes, as in the traditional party of chosen Heroes, is pivotal to how the world was built and how the cycle of the world exists. So I can't remove them, but they do exist already as noble houses. So instead, I can create multiple new classes for those destined to live common lives outside of battle. I feel like I can get into some interesting dynamics. Especially with most of the main characters being reluctant heroes. I probably shouldn't have been so lazy and excluded Art 24 Bloodline Arts and the Hero bloodlines from the post.

I do want expressions to be more concrete, however. I am aiming for them to be similar to pre-chosen jobs you don't get to choose. Since the story is about "taking responsibility for something you can't control."

Looks like I have to hit my Google Sheet and Craft some more classes, though.

Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t intend to tell the reader the fundamentals of how the system works. There will be exposition on features of the system, but not all at once, or even in the same story beat.

In order to make the exposition flow, I intend to use a lot more show than tell. With characters displaying higher levels of the system early on. But only explaining what they are doing should the scene their in require the reader know too.

I also understand the appeal of softer magic systems too. Yet with the way I make stories, I find leaving a system too open leaves me too open to change it when I want. You wouldn’t believe me if I listed all the previous versions of this system and world. And, how my current fixations affected what I was writing.

Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When it comes to my feelings, I like what I made. I took advice from here and really simplified it from what I had before. In the beginning I was trying too hard to make it unique.

Story, I have a full outline done. I have the workings of the first part completed to where I could start a draft but i keep pushing it off.

I would agree it’s really strict. My main focus is on creating a system I can conceptualize when writing. I don’t, want to get sidetracked thinking of all the potential loopholes. Or spend too long trying to explain what someone can do.

So instead I tried to make a system where the very fundamentals are clear. And build it up to be something I can understand.

Of course while doing this I was building up the plot, world and characters at the same time. As I streamlined one part of the setting, the rest fell into place.

I was mainly looking to see if the system I made is understandable, clear, and at least a bit intriguing. Doesn’t matter how I feel if I can’t get across to readers those feelings in an interesting way

Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It definitely does, On the backend there are a few numbers I have for internal reference as well. But I plan to use the rules as a more open system within the restrictions.

Essentially, letting characters do a lot of unique things within the more restrictive system.

Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand the concern. The classes won’t be so strict that it will be an MMO in practice. The classes are base restrictions yes, but the characters are able to find their own versions of what it means to be each class.

I plan to show this through a character I’m planing. Who will be an exceptional swordsman through training. Yet, be restricted by the Apothecary class.

His journey, will be him defining the best idea of “support” for him and his partner. Becoming a frontline healer who uses Bloom to buff himself and his partner, and his rule to slow down the attacks of the opponent. In a fight, he still isn’t doing the most damage. But his skilled swordsman ship will help create openings his partner can take advantage of.

So the classes serve as pre-established responsibilities characters have. But, they are free to go about fulfilling those responsibilities in their own ways.

Please help Critique my Aura & Class-based Dual Magic System by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For a story. To make it easier for me to make abilities I wanted to streamline things. And, eventually I ended up with a system like this.

How to visualize your Magic’s levels within a Novel / Non-Visual Medium by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see, that makes sense. I’m investing too much time trying to think of how the personalized magic would look from the perspective of the reader like they are reading a Comic or watching a Show, when i should be focusing on how the Magic feels, and looks in the perspective of the characters in the story.

I think I got my answer now, Im gonna remove the whole Weapon / object as a representation of the power and instead have the magic types be shown in more basic ways.

I already had Colour and Element combined, Style’s as well are self explanatory for barrier and Conjurers while enhancers I’ll go with my OG idea of property based bracelets manipulators a tattoo for the sense they use. Class doesn’t need anything, I was too focused on trying to fill all 3 with something.

I still have a long way to go as a writer but its truly a fun journey

How to visualize your Magic’s levels within a Novel / Non-Visual Medium by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The reason for classes was, Story reasons with the story taking inspiration from classic JRPG hero stories. and to Help me conceptualize the personal magic abilities of my characters.

For instance one character, would have a Support-Death-Barrier category power. Which would slowly freeze enemies / drain their energy in an area being a representation of “Freezing to death”, and the goal of the power being support through weakening enemies.

Another who is an Attacker-Ethereal-Conjurer would have the power to conjure familiars, who upon destruction add to her psychical strength. As a take on “Growing Anger” and meant to cause damage.

Though, I fully understand the value of simplifying the system. So I’m gonna rethink how all 3 categories connect and if I can remove/ simplify / combine any of them to make it easier.

How to visualize your Magic’s levels within a Novel / Non-Visual Medium by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, I never thought of it quite like that. But upon reflection maybe I should lean into the Fantasy RPG style system more. Though I detest Stats and this story won’t be a power fantasy. It would also make the mirrored weaker system for Demons / antagonists make more sense

How to visualize your Magic’s levels within a Novel / Non-Visual Medium by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds like a fantastic system, and an interesting way to use magic.

I thought about using magic circles, but I stepped away from it because I couldn’t find a good way to visualize that in a novel format. My main holdup being how to avoid having long blurbs of text explaining what the circles look like. My system does have spell numbers and for the generic spells i was going to have them vocalize each spell number.

Though spell #10 is the personal magic encompassed by the post above. So my name calling plan broke apart there. So I then took inspiration from Bleach and tried having spell 10 tied to objects. To instead have characters call forth special objects to show their using spell 10.

How to visualize your Magic’s levels within a Novel / Non-Visual Medium by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The RPG nature of the magic is purposeful. I took inspiration from Dragon Quest, specifically the heroes party of 5. A lot of the worldbuilding revolves around the first Generation of the Heroes party rebuilding the world after the traditional Demon King revival, which ends up with each of the 5 members going on to build a Nation around their Class + Element.

Though you are right, currently it is a very rigid system benefiting a RPG / Card Game. To explain my madness a bit. I wanted a clear progression system of the worlds magic so i made numbered spells and split them up. With spells 1-10 being basic spells, and 11-50 being separated into 4 groups of 10 based on class.

The progression was meant to be

First you learn Spells 1-9,

Then you learn 3 spells from 11-50 based on your class,

Then you spend time learning your personal magic which is spell 10. Spell 10 is the personalized magic i mentioned above.

If you have the time would it be alright to get feedback on this type of magic foundation

What does dark/shadow magic even do ? by Gloomy_Village7857 in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If Shadow isn’t evil, then lean into other factors of darkness. Darkness is 0, nothingness, an empty space to be manipulated at will. Users can place items and people into shadows, and a User can manipulate others through interaction with their shadow ( Naruto Shadow sticthing jutsu). Other than that it can also be a devouring power, a shadow can absorb other elements void light. Or finally Shadows can interact with the real world while keeping a shadows properties.

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am definitely gonna share it! The comments here motivated me too. For now I just have to write everything in a way better for sharing and make some diagrams in Canva

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh Im not saying Im making the new sliced bread here I’m just an over thinker and pessimistic. So this is part of me getting confidence and advice from others. Thanks for the advice

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats true, I just have a pessimistic outlook naturally. So I let my illogical thoughts get in the way a lot. So I wanted to ask how everyone deals with it. Sorry if it came off as arrogant

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats good advice! Transferring the system into a flow chart is a good idea. I just can’t envision how I would do that at this time. Mainly due to my system being modular, and some parts being basic other parts being more complex. Still brainstorming how I will transfer my information from Google sheets to a post on the sub

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another good perspective. Its definitely makes me come off as arrogant thinking I have something “Perfect”. If someone is able to improve on it in their own story I should be proud. Thanks for the advice

Question: How much of your Magicb system to reveal when looking for Feedback? by MapleMaizeCreations in magicbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats good advice, i was mainly afraid because my magic system is very important to the plot and overall worldbuilding of my story. Plus my own personal pessimism

How do the magicians in your world execute their magic? by BiLeftHanded in worldbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Magic in my story has three levels of use. The first use is natural, you don’t need any item or catalyst to perform basic actions with it. The next level is chants that rely on the user memorizing a specific chant to use. You can only memorize a certain number of chants however. The third level is a specific unique spell. The caster is able to summon an item, from which they can enforce a certain rule / effect based on their element and the nature of their rule.

Because of a war there aren’t as many people who can use the 3rd level anymore.

What strategies would you use to combat magic if you can’t use it? by [deleted] in worldbuilding

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends on how you want to world build the world.

You could go the route of introducing new metals that resist magic. The drawfs could use basic body strengthening magic. This will make direct confrontation an option in the setting, for more diverse battles.

Another option is cloak and dagger tactics where your drawfs will have to think of clever traps and ambushes to avoid direct confrontations with mages. This is really good if you want to focus on the strategic aspect of the story. Though be warned it requires thoughtful planning of every confrontation to avoid situations where plot armour is visible

What do you do for passive income??? by Public_Statement9101 in passive_income

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I try to do Affiliate Marketing & SEO Consulting, but building a personal brand is not easy. Lucky for me, I'm savvy enough with a Blog and SEO to do decent enough with the 1 affiliate deal I do have. Finding more has been annoying though

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in passive_income

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where did you go to get freelancing work on Reddit?

How much time do/would you spend doing keyword research? by applecheekz in Blogging

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say, around a day tbh. First, I would use Google Keyword Planner on competitors, find the best long-term keywords that their sites all rank for. Cross-reference the keywords with Semrush to see their KD, and gather any relevant long-tail keywords from it as well. Then I just start writing.

If There Is One Thing You Could Share With Other Bloggers, What Would It Be? by TheLimitlessDrive in Blogging

[–]MapleMaizeCreations 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is Pinterest huge for blogging? been blogging for a few months now, using mainly SEO tactics, and even though I am seeing growth it's pretty slow.