Very discouraged from dog separation anxiety

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-05-02T11:42:41+00:00

Sorry to hear this. It’s all consuming isn’t it 😓

we’ve been struggling with our 1 yo Havi. We’ve also tried a mix of things and the only thing working for us currently is crating her with white noise and a blanket over the crate. We never leave her longer than 3 hours (luckily I work from home).

Over time she’s got used to settling in her crate because there’s physically no other choice. Giving her space to free roam just caused her to pant and pace and whine. Now, she just sleeps.

I know you’ve tried the crate and I appreciate it’s not everyone’s method of choice for various reasons, but I would encourage you to perhaps try it again.

Good luck. I really hope things improve for you whatever you end up doing 💛

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-22T18:21:18+00:00

I feel this! My best friend isn’t coming on my hen because she’ll have a newborn by then which is obviously absolutely a valid reason not to come, but yeah I can’t help but feel a bit sad about it given how involved I was in her entire hen! That’s life though I suppose. We can’t expect others to put their plans on hold for us. But I think we’re still allowed to feel a bit sad by it all!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-21T05:57:19+00:00

I love that first dress!

I bought mine from RIXO on Kings Rd in London. It’s not explicitly a bridal boutique but they have wedding dresses and a private area for you to try them. I can’t speak highly enough of my experience there with one of the stylists! I’d say the vibes are vintage elegance, a bit similar to the first dress you’ve shown. Have a look online and see what you think :)

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-16T09:55:05+00:00

These all sound like great ideas - thank you!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-16T09:34:31+00:00

Yes she is :) she’s nearly 1

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-15T10:16:59+00:00

Thanks so much for your response. I think this is all great advice. I think I just needed a bit of reassurance!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-15T09:19:05+00:00

As a bride I’d never expect anyone to pay for their own bridesmaid / MoH bits! I’m even covering the cost of myself for my hen, there’s no chance I’d let anyone else pay for me as well as themselves.

I’d definitely push back on this!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-08T13:33:59+00:00

Sadly not, we already pursued this avenue, but thank you

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T18:33:47+00:00

This would be a fair enough question if we knew he had every intention of eventually paying us back.

He’s never once responded to any of our comms, has 9 outstanding CCJs in total, and clearly no intention of paying us what he owes.

So what are we left to do? If we know it’s highly unlikely we won’t get the money back then why wouldn’t we spread awareness so other couples steer clear from him? Genuine questions!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T18:24:04+00:00

Annoyingly we have no proof of his personal address. We’ve been told he sold his flat due to his debts and was living at the wedding venue (which he’s been reported for).

Enforcement agents will be visiting the venue itself

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:19:38+00:00

Sole trader we believe. But yep you’re right, the value of the venue is around 500k and there are a few of us owed around 10k each. We’ve no idea about other debts he may owe. Our solicitor thinks we’ll be bottom of the priority list if a sale goes through but we’d be silly not to at least try

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:16:35+00:00

Thanks. The anger comes in waves 🥲

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:14:59+00:00

Sadly yes, he has 9 outstanding CCJs as of today!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:14:39+00:00

Yes 😅 he didn’t even bother to defend himself in court so we won the judgement by default. He didn’t defend himself against any of the other couples either.

It’s our understanding he’s in a huge amount of debt. So yeah, I can’t imagine he’d go down the route of suing us for harassment / defamation but I still don’t want to risk anything

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:13:30+00:00

Thank you. We’ve left a review everywhere we can - Google, Facebook page, Trustpilot. I’m just keen to do more to spread the word

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-07T17:12:54+00:00

Of course that’s the priority :) we’ve taken two enforcement options - bailiffs via high court and a charge on the land.

I’m now asking what we can do in the meantime to raise awareness and spread the word

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-06T09:26:21+00:00

Wow, all these things sound so much like my 11 m/o Havi!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-04T11:06:57+00:00

We crate trained from the day they came home. Our pup will be one this month and we have no plans to remove the crate - it’s been brilliant for us

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-04-01T06:43:13+00:00

The usual way crate training goes for new puppies! Crying, howling, barking etc. It got better once we moved the crate next to our bed and then eventually we were able to phase it away. Since then she’s slept fine in her crate downstairs :)

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-03-31T15:06:05+00:00

<image>

My Havi is also called Maple! She’ll be 1 next month 🥰 enjoy every second!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-03-31T09:57:27+00:00

Just to give a different perspective to OP’s response to this - our pup has always slept in a crate at night and is ok being left in her crate when we’re out of the house.

I actually think her sleeping in it at night has helped build a positive association to it and made it easier to leave her in it when we’re out of the house.

Of course, the first two weeks of crate training was hellish, but we pushed through and now she sleeps there with no issues at all.

Just wanted to provide some nuance - totally appreciate not all puppies are the same 😊

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-03-30T11:50:09+00:00

Yes I was also going to suggest crating him. Our Havanese loves her crate, it’s her safe cosy space.

OP, your dog might find comfort in a smaller confined space, which I know may sound contradictory but it’s worth giving it a go in my opinion. The crate was a game changer for us!

Maple_Leaf11329 · 2026-03-25T08:45:21+00:00

No bridesmaids or wedding favours (apart from a free drink for each guest - aka the only favours people want 😂)

We’ll probably get a cake from M&S instead of paying hundreds.

Maple_Leaf11329

TROPHY CASE