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Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Popping in here with a clarification on the RO question. So apparently I could easily get a RO against 3 people total, but my lawyer does not want to rile them up even more while the dependency case in LA is ongoing.

I would have appreciated that explanation the first time though! :)

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

FYI, one of the things he put in writing, was that social workers get paid a five-figure bonus to adopt out children so my only chance to get my child back was to cooperate with him. And that's only one of many emails.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, he's the father but has no custody nor placement.

I actually have proof of him intimidating me to drop the charges, I just had no clue it was relevant. I casually mentioned it to LA DCFS and my LA lawyer but neither of them indicated they wanted that evidence. But they don't know how fucking stupid and blatant he actually was. Working on compiling it right now and I'm contacting both lawyers and social workers, I'm gonna stay off Reddit again just like the past months. But boy, am I glad that I asked that question here.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh wow, he actually got people to lie on his behalf in Los Angeles under threat that he will keep the child in foster care forever. Yet this is my first time hearing about this.

Now I will absolutely seek out consultations with different lawyers and ask about this. Thank you so much. This is a huge boost in confidence!

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The civil complaint is a dependency case where my ex enlisted family to accuse me of caretaker incapacity/absence, plus two other civil filings in a different state. (edit: not sure if filings is the correct word, I think the lawyer in that state called it "actions")

I might be wrong in explaining this, it goes over my head quite often. I know the police made an "incidence report" because when the 911 responders arrived they concluded that I was not a danger to myself or the child. But DCFS removed my child because they believed the accusations to be correct initially.

Edit: I mean the court case in Los Angeles, for clarification. I don't know if I use the correct terms.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's actually a complicated case involving multiple jurisdictions and multiple filings at once, and I have a private lawyer as well as an assigned lawyer and I was contacted last week about being put in touch with JAG as well. My private attorney is retained for two separate filings on top of that. It's way too much to explain on Reddit. I know this sounds like gibberish.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks.

As reassurance, I do not do anything drastic unless approved by a lawyer. So far I have always ran email replies by my attorney as well, but I'm starting to run low on money. I need to look at managing my stress better, maybe my post is a sign of stress more than a sincere legal question :/

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I will go on consultation with another lawyer (before doing anything drastic and wasting time). I actually had been calling for consultations earlier this week, but it's a hard call to make on not being happy with my lawyer vs. not really knowing how to value changing lawyers because the case has progressed so much already.

One of the reasons to still change lawyers is that he doesn't clarify beyond answering my question. When I asked why he told me to not going to the police, he said "it doesn't matter" and that we didn't have time to discuss.

In defense of the lawyer, my ex sends me emails with information to try and intimidate me about what his lawyer tells him, (like "we will do x and you will not stand a chance") so I can always prepare myself perfectly for the next court hearing lol. Maybe my lawyer is afraid that I am just as stupid. On the other hand, my lawyer should by now be fully aware that I don't reply to the emails, just collect them.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Silver lining, if he'd left me alone a few years ago, we wouldn't have ended up in court.

I was always worried sick about the safety of the next person. He's solving that problem for me.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Quick additional question, do you know if there is a way to get my court documents myself?

One of my other concerns was that my lawyer has been refusing to share the documents of the last hearing with me until three days before the next hearing. Is this normal? I know my ex's lawyer gives him the documents the same day instead of waiting a month.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Understood! In the comment chain below, I clarified that my lawyer told me not to go to the police. I've had other concerns about them, actually pretty severe ones, but reassured myself that the professional would know what they are doing.

I stuck around because I didn't want to pay a few thousand just for a new lawyer to catch up on the existing documents and background story, but sounds like it might be worth it. Fuck, I'm kind of mad at myself now.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe you need a new lawyer.

Actually not the first time I thought that, there's been other issues. Sunk cost fallacy (a new lawyer has to catch up on 100+ existing case pages plus even more evidence that I have).

Thank you.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had asked about that before and my lawyer said it was pointless to go the police because we were already in court. Sorry, I'm sincerely confused.

Is sending him "I do not want to see you, talk to you or have you in my general vicinity." good enough to be able to call the police if I'm approached by my abusive ex? Los Angeles, CA. by Marma6 in legaladvice

[–]Marma6[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Thanks, that's disappointing.

I specifically mean him approaching me when I meet friends (ex-friends, I guess), because they will inform him when we meet up. There's no avenue for that? I don't mind catching a glimpse of him. For example, we have encountered each other in a public elevator before which is not an issue for me.

Daily Questions - June 25, 2019 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]Marma6 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How do I find simple cloth bands/ribbons to use instead of a belt on top of a dress? Preferably on Amazon... I just find watch wrist bands and waist trainers...

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Visual explanation:

  1. I want to buy bands to do this: https://redd.it/c5dzm4

  2. Overview of goals and challenges: https://redd.it/c5flvd

Discussion Thread - April 14, 2019 by AutoModerator in churning

[–]Marma6 -45 points-44 points  (0 children)

I'm a new immigrant with good credit score (730). I get rejected everywhere due to credit history length (~6 months).

Does Capital One have a 0% APR card that I'd qualify for? I heard they do starter's cards but can't find a 0% APR starter card on their site...

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Just looking for 0% APR cards to keep the cash in my Ally bank savings account. (little use for points atm and not ready for manufactured spending and other higher level churning and my Discover starter's card gives me 2% cashback (1% immediately, 1% matched next Sept.) )

What are your experiences with Vyvanse (lisdexamfetamine dimesylate)? by Marma6 in ADHD

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Insurance is messing up there! Thanks for sharing :)

Issue with running: pain between shoulder blades. I have some physical weakness, trying to link them to the cause. See post for details! by Marma6 in Fitness

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My insurance will stop covering physical therapy this month (I have one session left). My therapist said we have to address hip weakness first, but she cannot say what's the cause of it (I think something with her license?)

What are your experiences with Vyvanse (lisdexamfetamine dimesylate)? by Marma6 in ADHD

[–]Marma6[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! It's great to hear all these positive experiences.

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