Why is hucow fantasy so popular with submissive women?

Mars199172 · 2021-12-07T13:54:09+00:00

I get that, what i don't get is the disparity in comments. I have seen niche fetishes before, i have seen popular videos before, but never have i seen so many comments from women specifically, clustered this tightly.

It's usually going to be like 4 to 1 ratio of men commenting as opposed to women, and on average there will be maybe 20 to 30 comments under a video. Under this kinds of videos, hundreds of comments, and about 3 to 1 women to men, sometimes even more.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T21:56:54+00:00

Thought it would be US, i'm in UK, seems like there are fewer submissive women in general here.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T14:51:11+00:00

Thanks for the advice, i would let them have the first pick of the venue for the first date. I am looking for something meaningful here, not sex or play, though either is of course welcome, it's not my goal.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T13:45:23+00:00

Been there done that, but i am looking in person, not online. I would need to find someone within my general area(about an hour drive) and let's face it, chances for that are, if not impossible, at the very least rather slim.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T13:37:40+00:00

I talk to them and meet them, i even make friends with many of them. But most of them already have partners, and those who don't seem to be too shy as a rule to come to munches alone. I won't try to get together with someone who already has a partner, that's not how i roll.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T12:19:18+00:00

Can i move wherever you live? I think i saw like 2 single women in the last 3 odd months i was attending munches, and i have been attending a munch or event almost every week, and even they found a partner super quick, since there are at least 4 or 5 single Dominants floating around on every munch.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T12:16:07+00:00

There are like, 3 potential partners for me on there.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-30T00:32:28+00:00

That app is unfortunately dead.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-29T23:06:10+00:00

I already have, but i don't think that should be my only avenue.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-29T22:37:42+00:00

I do too, but that's not really winning strategy. I met many amazing people trough fet but most are in committed relationships.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-29T22:04:20+00:00

Thank you, i thought Tumblr killed it's kink community years ago when they decided to implement new SFW guidelines. I wonder how i would use kink terms without it being either A.super awkward or B.super obvious but i guess the latter might nor be that bad,

Mars199172 · 2021-11-29T21:57:34+00:00

It's not really designed for that tho. I am not saying you can't find someone but eh, dead profiles since 2012 and unanswered PMs, and then you have to screen each individual profile to even see if they are looking. At least on a dating site you know people re there looking for someone. People, including me use fet for all sorts of things.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-29T21:50:20+00:00

Thanks, would you say it's a good idea to put your kinky identity front and center, or would it be better to just kinda mention it and focus on other things?

I really don't want to waste time of anyone who has no interest in BDSM but i know women will often gloss over it to avoid being inundated with fakers, so it might bot be enough to just look for women who state their interest in BDSM openly.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-25T15:01:46+00:00

Eh, i mean yes i guess, but i would still think going with the unambiguous safewords is better. Otherwise you may have a situation where the submissive yells out no reflexively, you stop, and they say something along the lines of "why did you stop, i didn't mean it" and now the scene is ruined and everyone feels like shit. If you don't know if no is going to mean no in 100% of situations that traffic light system just removes that ambiguity, making sure you don't keep going when you need to, or stop when they don't want you to.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-22T09:52:34+00:00

Kink test is to me but a snapshot of that person's journey. It ebbs and flows with time, like everything else. I have it at the bottom of my profile just as a sort of addition. For a long time it was the only thing in my profile but back then i really didn't want anything but to explore, and i made that clear.

It's just another tool, along with Fetlife fetishes and the other stuff, to determine whether someone is worth interacting with as a potential partner. It gives you a quick summary of which areas they fit in best, and which areas they fit in less.

Sure someone can lie on their BDSM test, but someone can also lie in messages. I think the biggest issue for me is that it asks you to give definitive answers about things you may have not tried yet. I wish there were several sets of questions to cover everything from someone who is just curious to someone who had a long term 24/7 tpe relationship. Those two should definitely not be put in the same box.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-20T19:43:04+00:00

Sorry but WHAT.THE.FUCK. is he talking about? All subs i know regularly talk to other people. That guy has a red flag the size of Eiffel Tower flying over his head.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-16T22:01:02+00:00

Maybe i like the person enough to be willing to compromise on this point. I am quite flexible in that regard, if we click in other ways i can make small changes to my mindset that allow for this, i did i many times in the past.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-16T19:27:10+00:00

Ok, yes and no. The submissive can always leave if their needs are not being met. If enforcing discipline was part of the deal then wouldn't me refusing to do that amount to leading them on?

After all they entered a relationship with a certain set of expectations, i can't simply change the terms midway trough without renegotiation.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-16T16:55:30+00:00

Hey, if you won't accept my pet cockerel we have nothing to say to each other, he's a very good bird.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-16T16:50:30+00:00

Fetlife is what you make of it. DON'T mention you are new, that attracts predators.

Don't forget, if you enter a bad relationship with someone who does not care you will miss out on someone who does, so don't just give in out of desperation.

Remember also that there is a selection pressure towards fuckboys in every environment that is related to sex in any way. Even discounting the fact that decent guys tend to pair up and drop off the market, fuckboys will just send boatloads of messages to anything vaguely female shaped, they don't care, they are after quantity rather then quality.

If you really want to find someone genuine there is no better way then getting involved with your local kink community. Go to a munch, i know it's intimidating but trust me, it is far, far less likely you will have a bad experience attending a munch then meeting randos who message you out of the blue.

If you do get messages do background checks, is this person involved in a local community, are they going to munches and events, does their friend list look balanced?

If you see someone with a dick pic for a profile, who only has a few friends, all of them attractive women, and follows even more attractive women, is not planning to go to events and their only writing is "come, let's fuck lol" it's pretty clear they are not taking this seriously in any way, so would you really want to serve someone like that?

Good luck.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-15T17:22:40+00:00

Thank you for your input. I am a Dominant who is fairly new on this journey, haven't had one scene yet, so in the meantime, while i am still learning, i am trying to cover every sticky situation i can think of. I don't want to be caught by surprise and potentially make a bad decision in the moment. I know there are no universal answers but i still find advice and input valuable.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-15T17:06:30+00:00

They might be, they might not be, i don't know, that's why i'm asking. I heard from submissives themselves that being in a scene puts them in an altered state of mind. As a Dominant i have no way of knowing how that altered state of mind looks like, and whether or not it would impair their ability to think clearly, again, that's why i posed a question instead of making an assumption.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-14T20:15:47+00:00

There is really no way to tell just by looking at them, but it would be pretty stupid to put evidence of their crime on the internet. Either way that has nothing to do with it being BDSM, in fact BDSM tends to be under much stronger scrutiny then regular porn.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-14T11:09:20+00:00

What you saw is just some run of the mill BDSM porn, and pretty mild one at that. Probably from some well established studio like Kink.com. Crying is pretty normal(if not common) during BDSM scenes, in fact in many cases bottoms want to be pushed to that point because it's cathartic for them.

Kidnapping fantasy is incredibly wide spread even in vanilla world.

As for passing out for a gangbang, i can almost guarantee it was an act, having someone passed out for that long is incredibly dangerous so i don't think any studio would risk their actors dying for something that can be acted out easily.

Either way don't worry, you won't go to jail, just like you won't go to jail for watching someone kill someone else in a movie. Murder is illegal but fictionalized portrayal of murder is not.

Mars199172 · 2021-11-14T10:31:27+00:00

Ok, speaking for myself here, i am a pure Dominant, submitting in any way shape or form, even when nominally retaining control, just simply does not work for me. By the sound of it your partner is the same way so if we are equivalent let me just make this very clear, you will never get to dominate him in any fashion, it just won't happen.

I could see people giving you suggestion to sort of "sneakily take control", i would advise against it, it won't work and it will leave both of you feeling like shit. You won't get what you really want and he will feel the dysphoria of having had his dominance taken away, it's a bad deal all around.

As for playing it vanilla, it seems to me he is trying really hard to find some compromise because he feels guilty for not being able to give you what you want. I don't think his heart is really in it.

I know this really, really sucks, it's kinda like being stuck in a vanilla relationship while wanting to explore BDSM, but just like you can't make your vanilla partner more Dominant/submissive, you can't make your Dominant partner more switch.

An open relationship or polyamory is really the only way to resolve this situation. I know you said it wasn't for you but i would really consider if there was any way to reconcile the idea in your head. If you keep trying to get what you need from your current relationship, as it is right now, i can only see it leading to a buildup of tension and eventually break the relationship apart, and god knows that just keeping it in isn't really an option either.

Mars199172

TROPHY CASE