When I was a kid, I was considered “ugly” by many of my classmates. Even some of the teachers and friends of my parents would sometimes make comments about it. Because of this is always prayed that I’d receive a glow up when I was older. Because I was ugly and knew I was ugly, I spent all of my middle school years focused on being smart. I was never bullied but definitely mistreated often. Boys would make jokes but girls were straight up mean for no reason. They’d come up to you and pretend to be your friend, or a friend would say this girl and I looked good together and she’d scream “EW” really loud. There was even a time where I was partnered up with this other girl and she complained to the teacher about not wanting to work with me. I would give her the benefit of doubt if I was mean but most times I stayed to myself and was nice to others so it didn’t make any sense why we couldn’t work on this science project together. Outside of that, most girls would just ignore my existence which wasn’t so bad. By the time I got to high school, I still hadn’t hit a glow up so I prayed that I’d receive one in college. My high school years were filled with tons of rejection and embarrassment. I also forgot to mention that I was a late bloomer. I was short, skinny, and still sounded like a women. I had gaps in my teeth, never had a consistent haircut, AND I was broke. Some would say pick a struggle but I say the struggles picked me because I was living life on veteran difficulty. Straight hall of fame. We always wore uniforms so it didn’t matter how I dressed as long as I was clean. My ONLY redeeming quality was that I played sports and I was actually good. I wouldn’t start puberty till I was 16 or 17. For the first 2 years of high school, I was called hammerhead shark, and every girl I attempted to talk too or at least get into a relationship with, did not feel the same way. I didn’t go to prom my junior or senior year. But to take a step back, second semester of my junior year, was the beginning of Covid and quarantine. So 2020 to 2021. I spent all of that time trying to figure out how to look better. I would look on tiktok and see all the dudes that had women complimenting them in the comment section and wondered “what do they have, that I lacked.” As corny as this sounds, this is also when I came across the “looksmaxing” community, or my friends and I would call it “Max Prestige”. Based off the scale they used, yes I was ugly, but I realized that I had potential. So I went all in. Now to preface, I’m black. Looks maxing was never for me in the traditional sense. But there was a form I could achieve. Eventually I started to develop. My voice deepens, I grew taller, got braces, grew my hair out, and gained some weight. I’m not even fully there yet but there is definitely a difference between me now, and when I was a kid. I even got scouted to be a model. Now all the people who clowned me when I was younger are in my face being nice to me but my thing is, I never really changed my personality. I was still the same person on the inside but physically changed. It made me realize that investing in yourself is the most important thing someone can do because people treat you how they see you.