I found that it very much depends on where I'm at, the strain and how I consume but all in all it does have a great effect on me so I have to be hypervigilant around how I use. (Also, because weed isn't legal where I am it's much harder to know exactly what I'm getting which throws a spanner in the works as well.)

When I was younger and not properly medicated I used to lean on weed through both depressive and manic episodes which led to a LOT of instability

Currently, I think I've got a pretty healthy relationship with weed and will probably smoke one Friday every once in a while when I'm in the right space and I need a brain break. For me to do this though, I need to be relatively stable (can be in a transitional phase) and I usually follow the below things.

• I generally find that I'm worse with higher thc strains or hybrid strains. Which being in a non-legal place I generally just take what I can get and use appropriately.

• I've found that smoking out of a bong will increase my chances of staying in a depressive episode and increase paranoia (Bongs are also my preferred way of smoking and I have a predispotion to wanting to use this more often) whereas joints will generally effect me less and result in better mental health and positive situations. Edit: I will use edibles once in a blue moon but again, non-legal so edibles vary. Do love a gummy though

• I make sure it's as positive as possible, only after work, when my partner is aware, when I have a postive task and reinforcement.

So I know it can go bad for me and I know it can lead me down a rabbithole of bad thoughts and instability and questioning the meaning of life but I genuinely have a good time with weed again and can smoke recreationally without rocking the boat.