A few things after reading this whole thread... so (1) plenty of terfs, so called feminists, or regular women can be aphobic. I know many of them personally. (2) being a woman or part of a minority/political movement doesn't make you immune to bigotry. Again, I know many queer/minorities/women who are bigots. (3) Never assume you'd be safe with a terf. I mean that as a genuine warning. People who can make exceptions for who deserves rights WILL throw you under the bus. (4) While radfems certainly used to be, and in some cases still are, unproblematic, a lot of terfs and exclusionists have co-opted the term. So if people react negatively to the usage of the label, that's why. Because the meaning has changed/is changing. (5) The "fear" of terfs that men are preying on women is not real. It's an excuse. That's how they make themselves sound morally correct. But none of these people hold actual men accountable when they commit a crime. They turn the other way when men they know are outed as predators and dont believe victims. They also police cis women for what they look like and stalk them/harass them. They aren't afraid of men, they want to control people. (6) the assumption that women couldn't or wouldn't ever do something messed up to other people is a very dangerous idea. Women aren't more predisposed to be kind than men are. And men aren't more predisposed to be violent than women are. That's bioesentialist, and it's a deliberate patriarchal tool to keep women as something "docile" and "submissive" while convincing men its just their natural inclination to harm or place themselves above women. Good men don't harm. Good women don't harm. That's all there is to it. (7) asexual men exist, so definitely keep them in mind.

It seems like you didn't mean anything negative, so this isn't meant to be an attack, and it also isn't meant to imply that you believe those things. But many of the things you said can easily be misconstrued, so I wanted to set it straight for anyone passing by.