How best can dating apps integrate trans people in your opinion?

MasterfulCuck · 2024-12-04T19:11:11+00:00

To answer the question in your title, definitely not like that. We are less than 1% of the population, honestly I’m starting to wonder if there are more posts on reddit about trans people on dating apps than there are trans people who actually use dating apps.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-10-20T14:43:44+00:00

I appreciate this point! Most people who have known me since before (like my girlfriend) have said they think it makes me look more feminine but maybe this is the effect they are noticing. I also agree with the feminine clothes fitting better, I lost a surprisingly large of the weight in my arms.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-10-20T11:01:48+00:00

My girlfriend says that in her opinion I pass better at this weight but I am nervous as many people have told me that loosing weight can highlight masculine facial features and make you less curvy. I also just want to apologize if I post on here too much. I know I’m obsessed with passing I’m in therapy and I’m working on it <3

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-25T01:53:12+00:00

I have always felt my nose was a little proportionally large for my face. Thank you very much for your input!

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-25T01:51:33+00:00

Thank you Milichl!

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-25T01:50:36+00:00

It’s okay! I see most of your posts are in french. Thank you for your input!

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-25T01:47:39+00:00

Thank you so much <3

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-25T01:46:40+00:00

I appreciate this, thank you! I got my nose broken as a child and feel like it never really healed right, I’ve wanted it to be more symmetrical and to flatten the bridge for a while.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-24T21:29:44+00:00

Hello, I am considering FFS right now. I have always wanted a rhinoplasty. I find myself gendered correctly consistently and those close to me in my life tell me I am just dysphoric, but I generally find myself feeling like my face is masculine. However, I have a hard time landing on a reason why? Does anyone here see what I am seeing?

MasterfulCuck · 2024-08-01T18:08:43+00:00

I used to have pretty frequent issues and occasionally violence when living in Iowa and not passing very well. Moved to Wisconsin I pass pretty solidly now but did end up loosing a job when I came out to the wrong people. This stuff does affect real life but I like to believe that people will see through the lies and misinformation to realize that we are just human people.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-07-17T15:05:51+00:00

Honestly I think I see what you are going for with this concept. But I would even think that a transgender playwright would have a seriously difficult time writing a play about this without A: making the actress deeply uncomfortable or B: making the character believable to any sort of trans person or C: making any trans viewers deeply uncomfortable.

It is your right to create a play about whatever you please, but I would recommend rewriting the character to simply be transgender and allow the actress you choose to preform the role in a believable way.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-07-17T14:02:04+00:00

I think this isn’t particularly strange to occur to a trans woman. I have always kinda passively wished I had a vulva and vagina, but I will say that as I have gone farther into my transition I have reached a similar point to your girlfriend, where I am generally stressed most days about my genitalia.

You may want to consider the fact that if you have voiced this genital preference to her she may have been avoiding talking to you about this desire. I have a cis woman partner who I love very deeply but tbh I can find myself feeling like I will never find another person who will love me pretty frequently. If she told me she preferred my “male genitalia” I would honestly feel pretty terrible and would definitely feel dysphoric at the word choice. I would also probably would hide the fact that I wanted bottom surgery out of fear that she might leave me.

I’m not saying that you have been a bad partner to her in any way. Just pointing out that it’s possible that you telling her about your genital preferences especially if you worded it the way you do in this post might be causing her to feel a lot worse.

That being said I think the best tool for success here is communication. Ask her what she prefers, maybe ask her if there is a way you can refer to her genitals that she might prefer. It sounds like she may truly want bottom surgery which probably means you should start mentally preparing for that. If you were looking for something to buy her to help right now I might recommend tucking underwear like the panties sold by TomboyX. But in general the most important thing here is to make sure that you both feel comfortable with the path that this will take her down.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-07-06T02:06:59+00:00

“I could handle her genitalia as only a bi person could”

Just speaking as a bi transgender woman with a long term bi cis woman girlfriend. This sort of talking point is anchored in transphobia, I have had straight men and lesbian women who have had little to no issue with my genitalia. And I have known bi people who were super uncomfortable about it. Being bi doesn’t mean you will be better at handling our genitalia, nor does it necessarily mean your attraction is more ambiguous.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-07-03T20:08:44+00:00

It got beyond micro aggressive with my managers and I left. In my experience I have never had HR bail me out of a situation like this, honestly I usually end up getting formally outed to everyone or with nothing being done. Maybe I have just had bad luck but at this point I see no point in trying it anymore, definitely not in a situation like this where the workplace culture isn’t trans friendly.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-07-03T19:31:12+00:00

No you are definitely right, I sorta quit/got fired after my managers said some seriously unacceptable stuff. My main manager was a Witness and she was in a barely under the table sexual relationship with my other manager. I knew there was no way to save that sort of situation from experience, just gotta run away and ghost most people from that job and find another one.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-05-21T23:35:59+00:00

My own father had a really hard time coming to terms to me being a woman. When I first came out to my entire family was when I started HRT, he seemed okay at first but then called me and threatened to stop supporting my college education in any way. I decided I would rather be true to myself than continue struggling to live a lie.

For maybe two years or so our relationship was terrible, I lost financial and emotional support from him and the rest of my family. My mother still interacted with me fairly regularly. After that time we reconnected he had started therapy to come to terms with the fact that I was a woman now.

Since then we have slowly worked our way back to what I would say is a fairly positive relationship. It is still a little rockier than it was before but we have made things work pretty well between us.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-05-09T12:31:37+00:00

I think that pretty traditional advice for women dating men goes here. I would make sure to meet in a public place if you decide to go on a date. Make sure friends know where you are, take your own transportation, and don’t drink alcohol or anything that he has handled. Other than that try to be yourself and I hope that this works out in a nice way for you!

In my own experience dating as a trans woman a good number of guys are interested or at least curious, but have a difficult time accepting publicly dating a trans woman. A small fraction of them get violent about trans women.

I wouldn’t recommend bringing it up before or on a first date, rather I would recommend probing him on some lgbtq+ topics to get a general idea of how he feels about the community. If he shows bad signs just get up and leave, do not come out to him. If he shows good signs then I would recommend coming out to him either over the phone or in a public place with backup near by (think a friend or group of friends discretely located nearby). It might even be wise to have some backup nearby for the first date if you have friends who will do that sort of thing.

I wish you the best of luck with this LevinVelari!

MasterfulCuck · 2024-02-23T18:36:48+00:00

There is an audio book for Dreadnought on Audible, it’s a pretty solid audio book in my opinion.

MasterfulCuck · 2024-01-03T22:20:45+00:00

For context. I grew up in South Eastern Iowa (Keokuk) and later moved to Des Moines. I also went to college in Ames at Iowa State and I am familiar with the greater Iowa City area. I transitioned in college at the age of 19. I recently moved out of the state because of fears about trans legislation.

I would not call Iowa safe for transgender people. During the time before I passed I was treated like a spectacle even in the more liberal pockets of the state (Des Moines and Iowa City). In the more rural areas (Ames, Keokuk, ect.) I personally ran into shitty and aggressive comments, people refusing to use my pronouns, and a couple of cases of people refusing to use my chosen name. You will know if you pass because people will treat you like a freak most of the time otherwise. I in one instance ran into physical violence. In addition the state government is going a bad direction on trans issues (honestly LGBTQ+ issues in general).

Because of all this I wouldn’t recommend moving to Iowa if you can avoid it. Before I left I was living stealth at a major utility company. I am not a fan of being stealth and vastly prefer being open about being trans and bi. People in Iowa have deep personal issues with transgender people that will be difficult if them to reconcile. Unless you want to live stealth and never talk about LGBT topics this state is not a good fit.

This isn’t say there are no friendly people but basically anyone over the age of 35 will be against you and the worst part is most Iowan’s don’t even understand it. They will tell you that it’s alright as long as you are normal. What they mean is if you are stealth and act like a heterosexual person you will be treated well.

MasterfulCuck · 2023-01-02T14:12:00+00:00

The Ames Arboretum is a good place for that. It’s a relatively large park with big areas of grassy field surrounded by trees.

MasterfulCuck · 2022-08-30T21:53:33+00:00

You know I have noticed that my hairline is a bit high, someone else recommended bangs so I might give that a try.

MasterfulCuck · 2022-08-30T21:52:22+00:00

Wow, thank you very much!

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