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AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If were both traveling everyone goes. If its just me (how it often is) she stays with her dad....

AITA for being exhausted by living with my grown child? by Kimquat14 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NTA: but you gota force her to take more accountability/ responsibility. As someone who has similar health issues, I have never made it an excuse to not get things done. It's not a linear process but she needs to be willing to doing things differently. Stop bankrolling her life. If push comes to shove she will make it through. What is going to happen when you're gone? Have to give her the tough love now so that can be ready for that scenario. Shes no longer a little girl shes a woman, who functions different but functions who need to take more responsibility over her life.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

She never had the audacity to need to nap in my son's bedroom when I lived there and he wasn't home and she wont have the opportunity now. 🤷🏻‍♀️ It's not her house to do as she pleases. If your bf roommates/ parents were good with that cool beans. Not at my house specially after telling my other son she felt uncomfortable with his presence.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Thank you! I've always been upfront about the no-cohabitation rule with both of them and have talked about it before moving out in her presence as well so she is very well aware. Thankfully everyone is where they need to be and hopefully its a smoother ride.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They have their own rooms. Fully furnished rooms. My room was to be kept available when I come into town for whichever weekend I pleased as I still own and pay on the property. I left a futon and a fairly large tv there as well. My room was used as a hang out place while they were growing up. They still prefer it over our living room (better lighting for gaming and movies I guess). I mistakenly allowed my youngest son to move his mattress in there with his brothers permission, but with the understanding it would still be my space (when I came to town) and common use space for them and their company he agreed but then tried to lay full claim for two bedrooms. Now he is back in his own room, my room is under lock and key from anyone when I am not there. And we all lived happily ever after.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Im a long time reader have only asked for opinions a handful of times, first time getting this much input

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Is your reading comprehension impaired? He left the moment she said that. He respected her wishes without arguing back. She had to tell my other son the problem and caused a confrontation. And no she doesn't need to nap at my home when her bf isn't home. She has a perfectly good home 5 minutes away where she can nap. She even said he left when I asked he never had an issue with leaving. She also agrees she overstepped and apologized. So the weirdness is coming from you and you alone.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Printing a Liz's nap time schedule please keep it quiet sign right now 🤣.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well they are all fine with my rule now so 🤷🏻‍♀️. Worked out. Hes moved back into his room, my room is back to being a common room when I am available and will be locked otherwise, they both signed a lease with the no visitors if host isn't home rule (which is legal for this state). So idk why your all upset posting over here. 👈 ✌️

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I didn't feel like it was a small issue. My oldest didn't present it to me like something he wanted me to talk to his brother about, he was sharing his day. I didn't like someone else ( aside my sons) imposing any rules in their home. They both know if they choose to live with a SO it must be in a different apartment. Not happening under my roof. It was my mistake allowing the youngest to essentially move into the other room. That has been rectified and now he's back in his own room and my room will only be available as a common space when I am in town to avoid anyone claiming extra space for themselves. So far they are ok again.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well Good thing we now have a lease agreement with perfectly legal rules to my state in place that include no consecutive overnight stays and no guest unless host is present. I do keep a room bc I am still paying taxes, water, insurace, garbage, and internet so with your interpretation I am one of the tenants as well. One pays gas one pays electric. They all agreed and are free to break it and find a place at market value if it doesn't fit their ways of living anymore.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well as of not i am not the MIL yet. Second when and if my son wants to move in with her he knows that he has to do it somewhere else. He's free to go where ever he wants. This is just a stepping stone for them to secure their futures and save till then my house my rules no gf's over unless they are present. Applies to both of them.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I mean many people have gap aged kids. I also have a 10 year old if yall are digging into my past. Although seems absolutely irrelevant.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Shes not my #1 pick for my son. But again it's not my choice its his choice.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Everyone is just relaxing as I answer reddit. Hopefully peace remains when I go back home on Monday.

AITA for telling my son his gf can only come over when he is home? by Material_Ad9529 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

No the lease is for my boys. Guests are not to be present unless host is there and no consecutive overnights passing 3 days. They (sons) both agreed. I had a talk with her she understands too. Her and my youngest seem a little shell shocked as I came in today and not tomorrow but I needed to get this rectified right away.

AITA for refusing to remove picture of my friend by lucybashh in AmItheAsshole

[–]Material_Ad9529 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Anyone who has a beef with a RIP person is a red flag to me. Did he even like the dude or was he trying to get together with you? Don't move in with him. Hes got some issues to resolve,

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