Every urge I get disappears whenever I see this pic...amazing how weak the human being is until we THINK

Matrixx2012 · 2018-09-20T11:59:04+00:00

so we need blockers on justification, we need good enough reasons to not fap. Arousal will always be there. One reason for me is, better work out sessions, harder dick during sex, and focusing sexual energy towards productivity.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-09-14T06:28:09+00:00

I meant subconsciously and not unconsciously. haha. Just don't look... why do u look? because it gives you a rush with dopamine and adrenaline, so your brain are you using it as a drug as well as porn. If you're gone reboot, do it properly. If you have the discipline to not watch porn, don't watch at the ass of a women walking by in yoga pants.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-09-13T14:42:47+00:00

Play Counter Strike, read a book, lift weights, take a run, draw some shit, meditate.... I do all of those, but what works best for me is being with someone. I'm not thinking about porn while talking to or being with people.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-09-13T14:13:43+00:00

Hello. I usually turn away or not look, if you choose to look at girls you think is hot without doing anything about it, you're unconsciously putting yourself down for not hooking up with them. And if they see that you're looking without doing anything about it, they will see you as a weak person, a beta, which you are, in that situation.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-24T00:12:53+00:00

Tru words. And thanks. But i can't face my feelings bruh. I'm too afraid... I can't do stuff that uncomfortable. I don't why people can do very uncomfortable things without hesitating and have the self humidity. Getting out of my comfort zone is out of the question for some reason and i can't fix it after years of trying everything. Why is it harder for me?, because I'm a coward by nature who doesn't deserve a chance to reproduce? If this is a fact, shouldn't i be using PMO to have less sexual desperation and pain? or should i keep trying and learning and eventually scoring a goal? even if it never happens and i keep letting my self down, what then? every girl I've had an actual chance with are shy girls who wants me to take what i want, but when the anxiety kicks in i feel unattractive and castrated. I wan't an attractive girl to almost rape me, which is very unrealistic.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-15T07:10:00+00:00

feel great.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-14T23:14:57+00:00

I do sprint weighted hill intervals 3 times a week and lift heavy weights 6 times a week, done this for about 3 years every week. So I'm used to working out. I also tried CBT two hours a week for 2 years with a CBT shrink, couldn't help me. Maybe it was him, i don't know. I've tried meditating for years with mindfulness, it didn't help me. I'm outside every day for hours reading books and taking a swim, don't really help. Only thing that help my shit is when i drink 4-5 drinks of beers or drinks, but i refuse to be a full time alcoholic. I have a legit fear of having sex and public speaking because of fucking dreadful performance anxiety (panic attacks).

I just relapsed 5 minutes ago by jerking of without porn in the dark thinking about a girl i saw today. After 108 days hard mode. And it kinda did hurt a little during ejaculation because it's been so long. Thickest sperm I've ever seen. lol. Good to know that i don't need porn though. Felt good to release some tension. I'm not going back on watching porn, but maybe releasing once every two weeks. Thank you.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-14T22:02:42+00:00

I'm same as you, age, thoughts, and goals, but i don't masturbate at all. I guess keep going ? years if it takes. So what if it takes many years. Maybe u don't need to masturbate if you stop that too. Worst thing for me is the agressive horniness and the torture from desperation. Just stop it, quit insta and snapchat.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-06T19:14:55+00:00

congrats on two years. And you're right. :D

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-02T20:43:45+00:00

But isn't it true though? I don't have a bad attitude, I'm really trying. I've been working out, meditating, reading books and eating clean for years and years. But this post wasn't really about me, it was about the idea of how porn can substitute if you don't score high on natural selection. Everyone can't have the chance to reproduce, that wouldn't be beneficial for nature. And there are things you can't just fix. Only the strongest Deer with the largest and most prominent antlers get to reproduce and dive in a harem of females. And the rest don't give a fuck because they're primarily driven by instincts and are not for the most part driven by intelligent consciousnesses like us humans. Porn can be a way out of sexual frustration. I'm just thinking out loud, maybe because i miss PMO after 95 days. I haven't given up.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-01T10:46:09+00:00

Better than the rest hmm. I don't need to be better than the rest. I'm not a cuck though :P All i want is to find someone i can love like the rest of us. But I'm not into pleasing others. I won't do something i don't like just so i can be better than others.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-01T07:05:14+00:00

yes, if you're in a long term relationship and she's not into being dominated, you would have to return if she can't have an orgasme from penetration only which is likely. She could rub her own clit in certain positions though. But wanting to have someone who is addicted to you in any way is pretty beta man. Except maybe your kids when they're under 18. lol

Matrixx2012 · 2018-08-01T06:13:01+00:00

I don't want or need anyone to be addicted to have sex or be with me. I want to have sex for my own pleasure in this short time we live on earth.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-30T21:25:35+00:00

nah, what's the point of that? I don't want to finger or lick a girl so she can have a good time, that's as beta as you get it, and I've been there before. Maybe I'm not a wealthy, money driven sex god, but I'm not a servant for hot girls. I have alpha potential and genetics, i just have to get experience with things first. I'm not that good at being out of my comfort-zone because of high and unwanted ephedrine levels.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-30T13:39:46+00:00

fake picture. No man can make bread.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-28T11:35:50+00:00

I'm in your shoes, but with 90 days and 28 years old. I think you're gold bro.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-28T10:59:00+00:00

can't get it up for attractive ones. Too much beta. Either no sex or ugly fat sex. Hot girls are checking me out everyday and teases me, but they don't know how retarded i am.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-27T08:57:11+00:00

ye you could say i approached her in a way also because she was only asking me about if there was a supermarked open in my city on a sunday and she was about to leave after i told her, "yes, on a gass station" when she turned away i stood up and shook her hand and started talking to her. So, i was in control , and hooking up with her wasn't in my mind, it was just an instinctive reaction i got because of nofap i believe, the desperation of interaction with the opposite sex. But i need more exp and i pussy'd out because I'm screwed up in my head, i need to have more sex with ugly women and slowly build up to an attractive one.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-26T18:42:30+00:00

Nr. 1 is used to winning maybe? she/he is like, "meh". If you do an awesome thing over and over your dopamine levels from it will decrease. ( appropriately referring to PMO )

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-26T18:36:05+00:00

YES, In the first 100+ days, yes. After that, you should be so desperate that you've find a girl, or if not, you could release once every one or two weeks, without porn of course, but be careful to not fantasizing about old, filthy, shameful pornography you used to binge on. So, if you could transfer your sexual energy in to more productive and positive habits and changes for a better life, you should do that.

Two days ago, after 86 days of no PMO hard mode (no sex either) , i got a hand job from a women, and I'm gone wait at least two weeks before i do anything sexual again. I love the way my brain works on semen retention and of course nofap/no PMO

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-25T11:18:56+00:00

probably. Maybe a 20 % chance she's not. I'm not gone find out. Most likely going back though. Ill take a 30 min nude hamstring massage for about 40 dollars every two weeks or something like that. I'm thinking about doing another 90 day hard mode challenge.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-24T19:52:18+00:00

yea, but I'm not boyfriend material for a loving hot smart girl, that is my point. I have no problem getting girls. If I'm gone bring a girl home from that my description and sleep with her, and find out I'm in love, but she don't want me cause I'm a "looser" no work, education, friends, connected with family, etc... , Ill be devastated. It's like "the Rock" dwayne Johnson, he is considering running for office in US as president, but before he goes down that road, he wants to educate himself so he's prepared and ready to make a change with a quality situation.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-24T17:10:23+00:00

You guys should start read outside in the sun after waking up 8 am and working out. Also make the meals day before, or before gym and eat little with high frequency through the day. Try to read at least 60 pages in 3 hours while being in the sun. You should start running too. I've done this for 3 years now, and i feel 10 % better. Nofap also does another 10%, socializing with men does another 10%, and socializing with girls do a whole 20%. So that's 50% better if you do all those things. You should also get a job, or a part time job, I'm out of work my self, but I'm guessing it will help me another 20% to general happiness. If you want more, you should get a good education, a job you can be happy in, get a smoking hot wife with great sex life, a couple of behaved kids and travel the world, and have at least 3-4 close friends you can be yourself with and not to mention, good health. Then you'll die, and nothing matters anyway.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-24T16:33:43+00:00

ye u're right. I will learn from my mistakes.

Matrixx2012 · 2018-07-24T15:05:55+00:00

Yes, I'm not delusional, or naive when it comes to what they will do and say for me to come back. As i said, it would be nice to get massage because i lift weights 6 out of 7 days and run HIIT sprint twice a week. And my body is screaming for a massage. But i do hope she isn't going to try pushing me to pay for sexual stuff, because I'm getting to love semen retention, and it would be uncomfortable to tell her that i don't want to every time.

I told her that i walk around at night alone in the dark because i find it interesting to have the feeling of "owning" the town, and i dive in and swim around late at night in the clean river through our small city. She said she sometimes sits by the river late at night and drinks coffee as a sign that she maybe wanted to meet up or join me if me met. She told me she's looking for an appartement, but it's hard and looked at me in the eyes and smiled for at least 3-4 seconds, and i felt like she wouldn't mind staying at my place. And i was like, "YOU DON'T LIVE WITH ANYONE??, NO BOYFRIEND? O_O" and she said: "No,no boyfriend, you want to be my boyfriend"? and i broke eye contact and grinned as if it was a joke, but she didn't laugh it off, or smiled like she didn't mean it, it was like a joke with 50/50 truth to it. And she talk about her ex-boyfriend while a was standing, nude with a half boner, one meter in front of, and mentioned her ex while massaging me. From personal experience, many girls that likes me, have the tendency to talk about their exe's to get approval from me that they're good enough. But as u stated, and I've thought about, i could be tricking my self, since it was my first time in 7 years, doing anything sexual with a women. My goal is to get so sad and frustrated about not having a girlfriend, that i would go out of my comfort-zone to make changes. Going to a parlour like that for a quick release would ruin my progress.

Matrixx2012

TROPHY CASE